Do You Think You Are The Exception?
And why exceptions prove the rule
Who is it that you admire?
It could be a business giant. An amazing athlete. A a magnificent artist.
Or it could be someone more humble. A parent who sacrificed hard for you. A friend who goes the extra mile.
Either way, decide on someone you do admire, and then think for a moment.
Are they an exception?
When we recognize someone as exceptional, what we are doing is recognizing attributes and characteristics that we don’t often see. It could be incredibly hard work, a natural athleticism, or an insightfulness that goes beyond the ordinary.
As we don’t see them very often, the rule becomes that most people are not like that. Thus these attributes and characteristics are exceptions to this rule.
That’s it. Exceptional people are exceptions to the rule that most people are not like they are.
Simply put, they have spent their lives focused on developing some skill or talent, putting in the work that most of us don’t. They’ve reflected, taken criticism, been knocked down and gotten up again.
They have embraced hardship, both physical and mental.
We can take this at face value and suppose that these people are exceptions. And in this sense, they are. And you may look at this rule and decide for yourself that you are indeed not an exception.
And, you are correct. You are not.
But not for the reason you think you are.
Are exceptional people all that?
What is the one thing in common about exceptional people?
It’s not innate talent; some have none.
And it’s not hard work per se; many people graft and grind away every day in hard, thankless jobs. But we don’t think of them as exceptional.
The one thing that is common amongst exceptional people is that they realise that they are not exceptions.
A contradiction in terms?
No. It’s not a contradiction, rather a shift is in focus.
We all know that an exceptional person is;
- Talented
- Hard-working
- Dedicated
- Relentless
- Adaptive
Those athletes training hard, year after year since childhood. The business leaders focus on the details. The artist that commits to their craft and reaches a state of mind where they can connect to the other-worldly.
But there is a difference between knowing something, and understanding it and then accepting it at an emotional level.
People will know that being exceptional means hard work, but still feel that exceptional people exist by virtue of some divine spark, fate smiling upon them from birth to success.
You’ve got to grind it out
The grind, day in and day out is hard. Each repetition in the honing of one’s craft is an exercise in difficulty. But what is harder is being consistent. What is harder is creating a space where exceptionality can exist.
Can you do one pullup, overhand, from a dead-hang with your chin reaching over the bar?
Most people cannot do a single one.
Think about how long and how much effort it would take for you to be able to do 5. Not 10, not 25.
5
If you can, then you know how much effort that 5 pullups entails. The grind, the working with bands, negatives, ring rows partials. It’s not easy and takes some time.
With that in mind, imagine the dedication that it would take to become the best gymnast at a local club. The hours of training from 4–5 years old. The missed video games. Passing when school friends ask you to join them for a Thursday wander.
How hard must it be to get to this level of gymnastic skill.
The skill on the rings, the levers, muscle-ups. This is way beyond 5 pullups.
But the best gymnast in a local club is not nearly Olympic level.
So when we look at exceptional people, we can barely comprehend how much work goes into reaching that level. Realising it is beyond most people, including myself.
Our normal is not their normal. Sure, it may be hard and tiring. Our normal is not stress free nor relaxing. But it is not at the same level. Not nearly.
And so we tend to put exceptional people into a category of ‘different’. It’s not that they have built their normal over years of dedication so that exceptional feats and success are par for the course.
They are just built differently
Can an exceptional person possess a physical characteristic that I do not?
Yes. I am not tall, and would not have found myself being able to compete in swimming or basketball.
But does that mean that there is nowhere that I can compete? Nowhere that I can excel?
No it does not. And anything else is cope.
The exceptional realised at some time in their lives that they were not in fact exceptional. That the abilities of exceptional people aren’t just handed out like participation trophies.
Instead, they realised that they weren’t an exception. That they’d have to put in the work. And lot’s of it.
So, the exception really does prove the rule. Look at Michael Jordan.
Conclusion
- You are not an exception
- Neither are exceptional people
- You have to admit to what you can do well and what you can’t
- Work hard at what you can do
- Then work really hard more
Enjoy my work? Then please subscribe here — https://medium.com/@michaelzwierzanski/subscribe
About me
- I will write for claps 👏
- I love to read your comments — keeps me mindful of my writing
- Always interested in reading new things, so let me know about your work
- Followers are in short supply (hint, hint)
- And, as always, I’m grateful for your time