How to Know If He’s Married and Lying About It
A lie is always clear but we ignore them out of love.
You met online, things are going great. He’s charming, caring, and romantic. He always texts you first thing in the morning to wish you a lovely day.
He mentioned he can only call you during certain hours because that’s when he’s usually free. You got carried away by his devotion to you but somehow your guts keep telling you that something about this man is off.
Well, if you feel this way, chances are something is really off in there. Women are very intuitive. But when we speak out our gut feelings, we get called crazy.
That’s ok! Because a little bit of craziness is good if you know you are right.
Men are deceitful more than women when it comes to cheating and love in romantic relationships. They will do or say anything to get a woman where they want her.
Additionally, society exonerates male infidelity, so men feel comfortable lying to get away with cheating when caught.
As for women, we don’t get such luxury. Women are humiliated when they cheat and if you sleep with a married man, you become the nastiest bitch among women. That’s why most women are curious to know if the man courting them is single or married before they accept a dating proposal from a man.
How to avoid dating a married man
As someone who has dated lots of married men, the first thing I advise women to do is to never believe a man over 40 who says he’s single and unattached. I know there are men out there who are over 40 and single, either separated, divorced, or never married.
However, the men you want to settle down with are usually happier married. So if this guy meets all your requirements you are easily tempted to believe he is single.
By not believing that he’s single, you become emotionally aware to recognize other red flags men hide when they married.
If he’s telling the truth that he is single, that’s great. But it’s better you believe him after your investigation than find out he is not after pouring your heart and soul into him.
I’m not saying you should abruptly tell him you don’t believe he is single. No! Don’t do that. If you do, he will change his strategy and make it difficult for you to know the truth.
So without further ado, let’s begin with the four signs that prove your boyfriend is married and lying to you about it.
“I don’t pick calls at night”
So your man says he doesn’t take calls at night but you never bothered to ask why. Or maybe you did and he made up a flimsy excuse about work and you believed him.
Too bad you fell for that lie because that’s a common code for cheating married men. They turn off their phones at night because the women in their lives would want to know why they didn’t come back home to them.
Men who have mastered the art of deceit, usually keep two phones. One is the number you have, which he keeps under his car seat or turned off when he returns to his family after work. And the other one, is his main phone, the one his wife or main chic has.
Although work can be stressful and you may need a quiet night or two to regain your strength without your phone buzzing. But if this becomes a daily habit, then he must be keeping another woman somewhere.
People who have nothing to hide don’t act shady and they certainly don’t off their phones or ignore their calls during specific hours…. consistently.
If you have been dating this man for at least six months and you are considering a permanent arrangement- say marriage or children, try to switch on his phone once in a while and see his reaction. You can turn on the silent mode to avoid waking him up.
If he gets mad at you, sister, run for the heels. But if he has nothing to hide, he won’t get offended. And if he’s intentions are true but he’s not yet in the same place you are, he will tell you right away that you’re going too far and where you stand with him.
Invading one’s privacy can be a red flag in relationships but a man who genuinely loves you will do whatever it takes to make you trust him, including breaking some boundaries.
“I live with my parents”
Your man is 40 and above, he has a well-paying job, takes care of his bills but still lives with his parents. [Coughs] That screams red to me.
Now some men do live with their parents even if they can afford to rent an apartment. However, these men also bring their girlfriends into their family home once in a while.
But if you have been dating this guy for six months and he has never, (not once) taken you to his house, or makes up excuses about preferring to meet at your place, that’s a big red flag to know he’s married.
Some will rent you an apartment if you are staying with your family or friend so they can come and go whenever they want without other people intruding in your business.
If he’s not taking you home it’s because he has a wife or children, maybe both living with him. Or it could be he doesn’t live with his family, but he definitely has another chic in his home which is why he can’t bring you to his house.
Sis, if you want to know if your man is married or not, do not make your home the meeting place. Do not allow him to move in with you until you are sure he isn’t hiding anything from you.
A man you’ve dated for six months and he has never for one day brought you to his home, and yet, he claims he’s single and unattached is a white lie you should never ignore.
You see the married rich guys don’t tell lies about their relationship status. They know they can get a woman whether they are single or married. And these ones usually don’t go for a committed relationship so they are upfront about the arrangement they have with you.
But you see, the insecure men will lie about their relationship status because they know they won’t get a loyal woman to commit to the relationship if she knows he’s married, so they lie.
If your man is working in a different state, away from his family, he may bring you home, which is why you need to look for two or three more red flags before you can conclude he is indeed married.
“I’m separated from my wife. Divorce is in process.”
Too many women fall for this lie and I keep saying it, don’t believe everything a man tells you on the first and second date. After three months, their lies will begin to expire, then you will know who is real and who isn’t if you are paying attention.
When it comes to my dating preference, I prefer married men. Yeah! Call me a bitch or whatever, it doesn’t matter. Some people get caught in horrible marriages and if they are cheating to make their misery bearable that is on them not me.
I simply go for what I want from a man and commitment is never on the table which is why married men fit in perfectly. With single guys, they are persistent. Even when you say you are not looking for any commitment, they think you are playing hard to get and bug you, which is annoying.
Anyway, judging from the many lies, I hear when a married man asks me out, 4 out of 10 always say they are separated but still living with their wives. But when I tell them I don’t mind if they are married or not, they quickly lose the mask and get real with me.
So if you ever want to catch a deceitful married boyfriend, pretend you are into married men for the first few weeks of dating him.
If he knows he has nothing to hide from you, he will call his wife or girlfriend in front of you exposing himself. He will be open about how many women he’s dating at the moment but he might say you are the only one he is in love with.
Well, I don’t need to tell you you are in for a surprise if you believe anything that comes out of this man’s mouth. However, now you know the real person you are dealing with, so it’s up to you to quit or ride with him.
If he’s telling the truth, ask for court proceedings. If he has filed for a divorce, then you deserve to know the stage the divorce is in before committing to this man.
“Don’t come to my house unless you call me.”
I don’t know how some women manage to be in a relationship with a liar and never spot the lies. But if a man warns you to never come to his house unless you call him first, that is a huge warning sign there.
Yes, because spontaneity is how you get to know the real identity of the person you are dating. You should be able to visit your partner at any time. I’m not saying you should be the creepy girlfriend that shows up at his door at 12 midnight. No!
But you should be able to visit him whenever you feel like it. Maybe you miss him and you want to be around him, or you bought him a gift and you decided a surprise was in order. Or maybe you are in his neighborhood and decided to see how he’s doing.
When a relationship has progressed to a certain level there are some boundaries that should not be a problem when your partner breaks them. It is true calling before you visit a person is the most courteous thing to do. However, most people who show up unannounced often catch their man on their lie.
So, if he issues a warning and snaps at you whenever you visit his home without invitation, then there is nothing left to say because you are definitely not the woman he wants to be with.
Even if he doesn’t have his wife or kids living with him, some men don’t bring their flings home because they don’t want any attachment from the entanglement. But if you’re looking for a serious relationship, then this man doesn’t meet the qualification.
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