How To Center (part 2)
Practices from the front line
Physical Center
One of the best ways to get grounded is by finding your physical center. I often ask clients whose bodies are expressing collapse (e.g., shoulders slumped) to sit tall in their chair and find their sit bones. The sit bones are quite literally the bones under the flesh of your bottom that you sit on. I then ask them to close their eyes and find the position in which they feel perfectly centered. You can do this by making micro-movements forward, back, and side to side until you feel the center point.
From this centered position, I often ask them to attend to the issue that was causing them to feel collapse and notice what changes have occurred in their attitude, perspective and sense of what they can do to address this issue. Typically, people’s perspective expands, their attitude improves and they see new options for responding to their circumstances. This is because our body affects our mind as much as our mind affects our body.
Connecting with the senses
Additionally, grounding involves connecting more strongly to the body and to the physical reality around you. There are a variety of ways to engage in physical grounding. For example, you can connect with your senses. Paying close attention and naming what you see, hear, sense (kinesthetically), smell, and taste[1] can be a powerful grounding exercise. Helping people ground in their current sensory experience is one way to stop panic episodes[2]. Another simple exercise is to walk barefoot in nature, on grass or sand for example, and really feel your feet connected to the earth. Using your imagination also works. You can, for example, imagine yourself rooting like a tree into the earth. This activates a felt sense experience of grounding.
Cognitive Grounding
A repetition of words can also create a shift in our mind-body states. I often use three simple words that can act as focal points to create a centered experience. These words are Silence, Stillness and Spaciousness (I have written a poem about these words). Repeating these words helps quiet the mind, relax the body and open the mind-body state to possibility. Adding imagery to the words can also amplify the effect. For example, with silence imagining the quiet of night, with stillness imagining the solidness of a mountain and with spaciousness an open field.
Mindfulness Meditation
Finally, I always teach my clients how to use mindfulness meditation. There are various ways in which one can engage in mindfulness practices but they all share the following features: present-centered attention and acceptance of experience (nonjudgmental attitude).
One version uses cognitive anchor points (adapted from a version that Thich Nhat Han teaches)
TRY THIS: Mental Hygiene — Mindfulness with Cognitive Anchor
Start by sitting tall (with a strong back and open heart) Name your intention to stay present for the next few minutes. Noticing your breathing. Noticing the breath in and out. For 1 minute say, “Breathing In” as you breathe in and “Breathing Out” as you breathe out. For 1 minute say, “Deep” as you breathe in and “Slow” as you breathe out. For 1 minute say, “Calm” as you breathe in and “Relaxed” as you breathe out. For 1 minute say, “Present Moment” as you breathe in and “Wonderful Moment” as you breathe out. For 1 minute say and experience, “Smile” as you breathe in and “Peace” as you breathe out.
Another version uses the breath and the body as the anchor points. Some people prefer one over the other so use the version that works best for you. If the words used in the cognitive anchor exercise don’t suit you, you can use either the repetition of a mantra (any words you choose to repeat), the centering prayer or simply count your breaths on prayer beads. A variety of guided exercises can be found on the internet and on my website: www.drharry.ca/products or YouTube channel.
The outcome of being centered
Research has shown that after two months of daily mindfulness practice, changes can be documented in the brain. These changes include an increase in metabolic activity and grey matter in the frontal cortex.
What transforms, however, is not the nature of your thoughts but your relationship to your thoughts. Let me explain what I mean. It turns out we have a lot of thoughts per day. Some estimates put the number between 50,000 and 80,000[3]. From your own experience, you know that some of those thoughts are brilliant and some are stupid, some are beautiful thoughts and others are ugly thoughts, some are sane thoughts while other thoughts are downright crazy.
It’s the nature of the mind to travel the gamut of possible thoughts. It’s what allows for creativity. Many people, however, are caught up repeating the same thoughts over and over having created a habit of thinking that is then reinforced through neural pathways. When we engage in mental hygiene practices we don’t stop negative thoughts from occurring. What changes is that these thoughts no longer trigger a cascade of associated negative thinking patterns. We simply notice and release thoughts that don’t serve us.
Footnotes
[1] Remember the eating raisins exercise described in the beginning of the book.
[2] Panic episodes typically involve people having catastrophic thinking that activates the stress response system and then creates physiological changes that are interpreted as life threatening. For example, the constriction of the pectoral muscles is interpreted as a heart attack. This creates further catastrophic thoughts and physiological activation. Grounding in present moment sensory experience stops the cascade of catastrophic thinking and thereby turns off the stress response system and the physiological symptoms.
[3] This range is often mentioned by both professionals and other writers. The National Science Foundation, however, estimated 50,000 thoughts per day as most accurate. All estimates are controversial because, let’s face it, this is difficult to measure. Nevertheless, we can, just by paying attention to our experience, appreciate that we have a lot of thoughts every day.
Part 1 can be found here:
