How I Learned the Skill of Seduction from Sex Workers
Sex work is more than just sex
I used to have a shallow perception of sex workers. When I hear the words sex worker, my mind drives off to money for sex. Though this is the true definition of a sex worker, their job involves more than getting a man or woman to orgasm.
I have a few friends who are sex workers. Sometimes, when we hook up, our conversation is usually more about human emotions and our misconception that we can find happiness without human connection, which is a big fat lie!
In fact, a Harvard study proves that human connections and healthy relationships are the main causes of longevity.
Human connection is defined as the exchange of positive energy between people. The potential for you to feel and be understood through a human connection is one of the most valuable aspects of life.
It has the power to deepen the moment and the connection between people, inspire change, and build trust.
Human connection has been proven to reduce anxiety and depression. It helps us better regulate our emotions and leads to higher self-esteem and empathy, which is said to change our immune system for the better.
Sex workers connect with our emotions more than a therapist. Through my relationship with my sex worker friends, I learned how to be a better companion.
Most of the personalities I learned have a positive impact on my career and relationship with people. Let’s take a closer look at these lessons.
Listening without judging
One of the challenges we have with communication is that we often listen and respond based on our perception. But sex workers listen and respond based on the speaker’s perception.
That is how they are able to connect with their clients. They listen and make their clients feel wanted. They show their concern in their voice and expression.
How to be irresistible
Sex workers show off a dominant personality whenever they walk into a room. They know to make themselves appear irresistible to their client, first, by having a sexy appeal- from their fashion style down to their composure.
Second, by their action. They know how to make a man giggle no matter how self-composed he may be.
I learned how to make myself attractive even when I’m stressed or having a bad day. On a lazy day, I can still look sexy with a perfect blend of color, texture, and fabric that speaks to my audience. This is how a sex worker makes statements that attract men.
Sex work also involves getting the client to unleash their burden during a session. Our men are not equipped to express their emotions, but with a sex worker, they can rant about their worries without being ashamed of their feelings — this is why most men visit brothels when their heart is burdened.
Take responsibility for your own shit
We like to blame other people for the bad things that happen in our life. Whether we are having a bad day or a bad life, there must be someone responsible for it because it hurts less than when we accept we are responsible for whatever tragedy we face.
Sex work is not glamorous, but these workers don’t go about with the blame game. They own their shit. Most sex workers I know have had a really bad experience that led to their choice to give sex in exchange for money, yet they don’t transfer their pain to others.
They know how to put on a smile and give their clients good sex and sometimes act as an occupational therapist to make their clients happy.
Sex workers are the best companions
There are times when my self-esteem hits low. In those moments, being around my regular friends becomes intimidating. You know those times when we feel off, and all you need is someone to get into your soul and lift the heaviness?
Well, my gangs are the least set of people you want to talk to about your vulnerability.
They will give me positive self-talk without considering how I feel. Then they will snap my ass and say, “Get over it, girl.” “This isn’t the Jess we know.” As if I’m superhuman with zero weak points.
When I ever I’m feeling vulnerable, my sex worker friends are my best companion. Those girls know how to make you come clean with your deepest thoughts. With them, I don’t have to pretend or hide how I truly feel.
If you want to learn how to be confident in yourself, you should make friends with sex workers. Their strength and courage can put you through anything in life.
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