#29 — Dead or Alive

Hi, This Is Jim

Remember me now?

I received a strange letter this morning. It was from the grandson of a grandma I regularly play Scrabble with. “My grandma told me you’re a Medium writer. You must know Kristine, who pretends she doesn’t know me anymore; she writes on Medium too. Could you pass her this letter?”

I didn’t have the heart to tell him hundreds of thousands of writers write on Medium. I’m sharing his letter hoping someone will recognize the Kristine he’s talking about.

Here’s the letter.

Kristine, eh,

Jerry from Toronto asks if you know me, and you PRETEND not to?!

You ramble for hours about how many Jims there are in your town and how silly it is to think you would know the Jim Jerry’s talking about.

Kristine, you old Canuck.

After all the Sundays we spent in our housecoats, sitting in the Muskoka chairs, downing mickeys and two-fours, it hurts to see you pretend not to know me.

It hit hard straight in the Molson’s muscle, Kristine.

I might be a hoser on pogey, but I deserve better than the silent treatment after all these backbacons we ate on the chesterfield. It meant something to me, you know?

You even invited me to your stagette, for Saskatoon’s sake!! You know it’s no joke to bring a bannock like me to a stagette. YOU KNOW.

Eh, I’ll leave the tourtéire in the oven. I don’t want to kerfuffle and blush you in front of all your writer friends because that’s not my style. But I thought it wasn’t yours either, and I was wrong.

Jim.

PS: If you want to apologize, you’ll find me bouncing in the castle. I wear a red tuque these days.

End of letter.

*Edit* Thanks to the wonderful people at Medium, we found the Kristine Jim was referring to! It’s Kristine Laco, and she wrote an open letter to Jerry last week, which (apparently) explains Jim’s reaction. I’m a bit lost in all this, but I trust you young folks will find your way. I’m off to Timmy for a cocoa double double.

See you all on the other side of the Poutine.

Grandma Smillew loves her afternoon cup of cocoa, scrabble, and her grandson, Smillew Rahcuef. She’s also a pink belt in social media and marketing strategies. If you want to make her happy, follow her on Medium and write for one of her publications: All About Medium and Grandma Power.

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