Hell Will Break Loose if I Write Angry
I call it: Writing with Passion
February tried to destroy me, but I survived it — mentally drained, yet slowly finding balance and harmony again.
It was one of those months where everything felt somewhat chaotic. One small thing, one event, one action triggered a chain reaction of other events, like a cascade of dominoes I never expected.
As I write this, I wonder: is it therapeutic or toxic to write when angry? Answering my own question, writing accepts all emotions; there are no rules, and it embraces whatever mood we’re in.
I don’t believe anyone is in their zen state of mind every time they sit to write. Are they? Are you?
I can almost hear what you’re thinking: “Relax, it’s just the start of March. Take in the new season and all the adventures it holds, blah blah blah. You’re right!
Just like it’s healthy to have disagreements with your partner, to have off days, it’s perfectly okay not to be okay. And I’m not okay. Life has me feeling burnt out, and every time I try to take a moment for myself, it gets taken away. It’s as if I’m always putting others first, forgetting about my own needs along the way.
Right now, my life feels like a giant pot of soup, simmering with unfamiliar ingredients that I never saw coming. Each day brings a new flavor, a new twist, and I’m constantly surprised by what gets thrown into the mix.
What the hell is this?!
It feels like everything around me is spinning faster than I can keep up. In those moments, I find myself yearning for a secret hideaway, a place where I can escape and recharge my spirit for a day or two.
Lately, I’ve felt totally disconnected from everything, so I picked up a book at the library: “Verity” by Colleen Hoover. Two days later, I finished it. It was my first time reading Hoover’s work, despite hearing mixed reviews. But I wanted to see for myself, and I’m really glad I did.
Granted, it was only one book that I read, and I’m not going to lie, I was hooked. I just needed to lose myself in some fiction. I’ll be reading “It Ends With Us” next.
You know, I can’t say for sure if my time spent reading and writing on Medium made me a speed reader, but devouring a book in just two days was a first for me. Also, taking a break from social media felt refreshing, which never surprises me.
I always keep my notifications off, but actually deleting the app off my phone was like freeing up space for things that matter.
Being angry wasn’t such a bad thing after all — it helped me break free from negative habits and discover some unexpected positives.
Today is my son’s second birthday, and I’m feeling excited. Last year’s party taught me a valuable lesson: not to stress over kids’ parties.
Just don’t do it. They won’t remember it anyway.
It’s a simple mistake many first-time parents make. But as the big day approaches, I can’t shake off the pressure. Why worry when it always turns out fine in the end?
It’s because we want everything perfect for our little ones without showing any negative emotions. Isn’t that what moms do? Hide how they’re really feeling and then scream into a pillow later when no one’s watching?
Despite the joy of seeing my son grow, I can’t ignore how tired I feel, both physically and mentally. So, this year, I’ve decided on something different: a fun day instead of a party. We could all use a little fun.
So, happy birthday to me too! I’m two years into this amazing journey called motherhood, constantly learning, growing, and striving to give my best every day while also acknowledging my humanity.
When I stumbled upon 𝓓𝓲𝓪𝓷𝓪 𝓒 latest March Prompts: “Write about who kicked you when you were at your lowest,” it hit me hard. Life — life kicked my ass a little.
But here I am, still standing, still showing up, and writing this, expressing it the way I want to.