Inspiration and Life

4 Steps to Handle a Challenge

How challenges strengthen you

Do you know anyone who has never faced a challenge in life? Such a person never has and never will exist. How can I be so sure? Because the first challenge we have after birth is to take a breath, and the last challenge in our life will be our final breath. Between these two breaths, every person faces a lifetime of challenges.

Though we always face challenges, be filled with great hope. Challenges are a wonder of the universe and create beautiful and amazing things in our lives. Read on to learn more!

The challenge of life

There is no question that life is full of challenges. Have you noticed how their complexity grows as you age? Early challenges are mostly about eating and staying safe. When you are young, you have the challenge of getting an education and finding a job. These challenges are only the beginning.

Everything in life that is important came into being because someone accepted a challenge. It is difficult to imagine where we would be today were it not for the countless challenges faced by so many in our past and present.

When you look at your life, realize you are where you are today because of the challenges you have already faced and overcome. You will be where you will be tomorrow because of these past challenges and overcoming new challenges ahead.

Be of good cheer, and don’t be afraid of the challenges in your future. Face them with excitement and enthusiasm for what they will help you create in your life and for making you a better person!

Let’s look at four steps to turn any challenge into a win.

At the end of each of the first three steps is a question and a choice to be made. Upon completing step 4, you will be well on your way to gaining victory over the challenge you choose to examine.

“Be your biggest competitor — challenge yourself each day to be better than you were yesterday.” Kaoru (1974-present)

Step 1 — Categorize the challenge

While the challenges we face are practically limitless, you will find they fall into a limited number of categories. A few of these include:

• Health
• School
• Work/Career
• Marriage
• Relationships
• Loss
• Failure
• Setbacks
• Spiritual Growth
• Personal Growth
• Life in general

What is the most typical category your routine challenges fall into? Take note of which are more common and choose one specific challenge in your life before moving to step 2.

“Everyone faces challenges in life. It’s a matter of how you learn to overcome them and use them to your advantage.” Celestine Chua (1984-present)

Step 2 — Response to challenges

How you respond to challenges says a lot about who you are. How do you typically deal with the more common challenges in life? Do you:

• Fight
• Flee
• Freeze
• Fawn
• Avoid
• Ignore
• Hide

For the challenge chosen in step 1, which response(s) on the above list applies most?

“Running away from any problem only increases the distance from the solution.” Anonymous

Step 3 — How challenges define you

The things you struggle with tell you a lot about yourself. To better understand how challenges affect your life, let’s take a closer look at some things they tell you:

• It’s important to me
• It’s not important to me
• Who I am
• Who I’m becoming
• My stress point
• My commitment
• My lack of commitment
• My maturity
• My lack of maturity

For the challenge, you chose in step 1, which of the above defines how you deal with it? What, if anything, does this tell you about how you deal with life? For the challenge chosen in step 1, which on the above list applies most?

“The moment you stop accepting challenges is the moment you stop moving forward.” Anonymous

Step 4 — Dealing with challenges

The best way to overcome a challenge in life is to conquer it!

“A challenge only becomes an obstacle when you bow to it.” Ray Davis (1941-present)

Please note this exercise is not a one-and-done thing. The more challenges you face using this method, the more you overcome. The more you overcome, the easier it is to take on future challenges, leading you to a better and more satisfying life.

For this final step, we will walk through the following process. It is best to write it out to help it create a greater impact on you.

1. Examine, understand, and make meaning of it
2. Name it (make it as memorable as possible)
3. Find the good in it
4. Assumptions made
5. Develop your intent
6. What good could it create
7. Experiment
8. Examine the results

Example #1

The challenge: getting out of bed

• Step 1 — Category — School and Work/Career
• Step 2 — Response — Ignore
• Step 3 — Define me — It’s important to me, my commitment, and who I’m becoming
• Step 4 — Process

1. Looking at how difficult it is for me to get up in the morning, I have no excuse other than going to bed too late. But I hate going to bed before midnight! I guess it is just the way I am.
2. I name this challenge “irresponsible” because I know I am not being responsible.
3. The only good in it is I will get my degree when I finish school, provided I don’t allow it to derail me. Then I may be able to get a good job and have a decent future.
4. The only assumption I can think of is assuming it doesn’t hurt if I slack off a little. Even though I sleep late, I still make most classes on time. I do assume I can focus in class, which is not the case when I am tired.
5. I could commit to getting a little more sleep.
6. It would be good to get rid of some of the stress it causes, especially in the mornings.
7. I’ll try to get to bed an hour earlier for a while and see how it goes.
8. I will check the first of the month to see if I have stuck with it and look at the results.

“We don’t grow when things are easy; we grow when we face challenges.” Anonymous

Example #2

The challenge: Getting promoted

• Step 1 — Category — Work/Career
• Step 2 — Response — I have frozen and avoided it
• Step 3 — Define me — It is important to me and who I am
• Step 4 -Process

1. I have been working here for two years and did not get a recent promotion. I asked my boss why, and he said it was a hard choice, but John had a master’s degree and a little more experience than me. I believe I put in more effort than John and am disappointed that I didn’t get the promotion and the pay.
2. I name this challenge “Never passed over again!”
3. I am rethinking what I am doing with my life. How can I ever get ahead? I know I can do what I put my mind to, so I will use this as the motivation I need never to get passed over again.
4. I assumed I would get the promotion because I put in more hours than John. I assumed the difference in education didn’t matter that much. I assumed I had earned it.
5. I intend not to allow this to happen to me again. I will use the company program for education assistance, enroll in the Leadership Development Program at the local university, and examine my options beyond that.
6. The next time a promotion comes around, I will be ready. This experience will help me become a more valuable employee.
7. I will use the leadership course and further study to improve my chances next time.
8. I will complete the leadership course in July and will put a reminder on my calendar to consider how well this path is working and what I can do next to build on it.

“If you don’t challenge yourself, you will never realize what you can become.” Anonymous

Example #3

The challenge: Becoming and staying healthy

• Step 1 — Category — Health and life in general
• Step 2 — Response — I have avoided it and tried to ignore it
• Step 3 — Define me — It is my lack of commitment and has become my stress point
• Step 4 -Process

1. I need to get in shape. I carry too much weight and know it will harm my health if I don’t start working out.
2. I name this challenge”Become healthy and live long.”
3. If I work out five days a week, I will lose a little weight and improve my health. Since heart issues run in the family and I want to live a long healthy life, I better get cracking.
4. I have always assumed I have plenty of time to get to it. Yet time is going by so quickly! I have assumed trying to eat healthy foods negates the need for very much exercise, yet what I am finding out is it is not entirely true.
5. I intend to set aside an hour each weekday morning to work out. I intend to become healthier and live longer for my spouse and children.
6. I may avoid some of my hereditary heart issues by eating right and exercising regularly. I need my family, and they depend on me to provide for them. If I am healthier, I will live longer and engage more with them.
7. I will start walking tomorrow morning and slowly work up to running. I will not push myself too hard, so I can enjoy it.
8. I will give it a month and see how I feel.

“If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.” Fred Devito (1964-present)

Final thoughts

The best way to attempt the above exercise is to find a partner. This will give you someone to discuss it with and add accountability, significantly strengthening the likelihood of accomplishing what you seek.

Once you find a partner and work on at least one challenge, that small success can help you for the rest of your life. Start now, conquer that first challenge, and move on to the next, and the next, and the next…

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Bill Abbate Leadership Writer and Editor in ILLUMINATION

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