Four Shiny Life Goals I No Longer Aspire For
Even though one of them was my dream.
Three years ago, my life goal was to be a consultant in the corporate sector.
I wanted this because it looked so shiny — free travelling for work, big paychecks, growth prospects, and problem-solving.
Then, my uncle who worked for 3 weeks in India and 3 weeks in the U.S. told me how taxing it is to travel.
The ‘travels’ are full of meetings and there’s hardly any time to explore because you have to work, rest and repeat.
I thought he said that only because he’s older and wants to spend more time with his kids.
From then to now, my life has completely changed. From aspiring to be a consultant, I now just want to be happy doing what I love and making money online.
In that process, here are four shiny goals I’ve realised I no longer want from life.
A Busy Day
Today, I was telling my husband (feels weird to use this term as we only got married 16 days ago) how grateful I am to do what I do for a living.
We spent an hour together outside in the winter sun and had tea when he woke up, which is three hours after me. In the evening, we were sitting with his family and talking about his childhood tales.
I couldn’t do this if I was still at my corporate job or had a calendar full of meetings.
My work priority since the beginning has been to do quality work that pays me well and ultimately increases my passive income.
It didn’t start this way, of course. I had to do lots of freelancing and 12-hour workdays by side hustling with my 9–5 to have what I do today. But it’s slowly heading where I want it to.
Fitting Other People’s Definitions
Knowing your definition of happiness, success, and ‘enough’ is important. Leave it to society and you’ll lose your mental peace.
I was holidaying in Goa two months ago, the Indian state known for its beaches. My friend’s friend joined us. He works at one of the most prestigious universities in the country, but he’s a tech guy.
I asked him why doesn’t he work in the corporate sector instead. He’ll earn way more money.
He told me he shifted cities only because where he’s from is the IT and startup capital where everyone is talking about evaluations. He doesn’t relate to that world.
Here, he gets perks and can learn, explore, and get involved in service projects. He doesn’t want a lot of money. He just wants to do his thing.
To him, that’s what defines success.
To me, a 4-hour workday and owning my time is the meaning of success. To somebody, becoming a Vice President in a multinational is what success looks like.
But for some reason, the highest-marketed success is the American Dream. We don’t think whether it fits with our core values; we blindly follow it even it makes us unhappy.
Knowing your definition of happiness, success, and ‘enough’ is important. Leave it to society and you’ll lose your mental peace.
Fame
The person you see below is a content creator, Ankur Warikoo. He has
- 2 million LinkedIn followers
- 2.42 million YouTube subscribers, and
- 523K Twitter followers
We met for breakfast. In this cafe, 4 people reached out to him to politely say hi.
He’s insanely popular amongst India’s youth. I’ve heard people come up to him for selfies in malls and he gets bombarded by the youth when he visits colleges to give talks.
I love him. Everyone loves him because he adds so much value.
And while I create content too, I hope never to become so famous that people want photos with me. I’m so introverted that I prefer to hide instead of creating small talk even when I see a known person randomly, so this is a bit too much for me.
I just want my words to be known someday, if at all.
Lots of Friends
Meeting people takes so much time and effort, so why give away what’s finite to people who don’t truly matter?
I’m yet to figure out how big groups have actual conversations. How do you discuss your problems, fun incidents, or life in general?
How do you have a heart-to-heart conversation?
And if you cannot, then it’s a shame, isn’t it?
To each their own.
As a teen, I thought this is what I want because back then it looked cool on Snapchat to be around many people. Right now? A group of 3 is the biggest group I’d want to hang out in.
Anything more than that is too many cross-conversations and closing down instead of opening up.
Quality over quantity.
Meeting people takes so much time and effort, so why give away what’s finite to people who don’t truly matter?
I’m 26, but I just realised I sound 50 here…
I’m not sure if you resonate with them all or even with one. But if you do, I’d love to hear it in the comments to know that I’m not alone in this.
Perspectives change as we grow. Maybe mine will grow too.
Maybe I’ll have Ankur Warikoo’s patience one day to be polite, smile, and say hi to everyone I meet.
Who knows?
Maybe.
Maybe not.
