LOVE | DEMENTIA | POETRY

For Somebody, I Love So Much, But Knows Me Not!

We remember their love when they can no longer remember.

“Where are you going, Papa?”, I asked. “I’ll be heading home now.” “But this is your home, why leave now?”

“My kins are waiting I must prepare my things!” And then he puts, his stuff in a tiny eco bag.

Curiously, I snapped back, “Wait, who are those waiting for you then?” Readily he answers, “My mom and dad, and my siblings!”

Poor old father! He thinks, like a little boy again. To lessen our arguing, I just helped him pack his clothes and crap.

And on and on, I kept telling him, “Be good, stay at home, for I will see you again soon.”

I set aside all these worrying thoughts, and left for work; later, when I got home that evening, feeling weary, I went straight to bed at once.

Moments later awakened again, by neighbors’ loud knockin’ and shoutin’; “Your dad is strolling in the middle of the night!” Annoyed by the disturbance, I ran after him who was then walking in the dark.

I got mad, stopped him, and told him, “I am feeling so tired and sleepy. You might as well get rest, too. Don't disturb me again, do please have pity!”

He just gave me, a cold blank stare and replied, “Who are you to say that?” “I have my own family and kids to take care of me.”

Little did I know, I just got a few days being with him, before he finally leaves us forever.

Wherever you are Tatay, forgive me for what I've said; I realized I have offended you but I don't mean to hurt you.

I knew you are an amazing dad, you took good care of us well; you gave us more than enough food and shelter and showered us with love.

Until that ill-fated dementia, separated you away from us, unwinding your life slowly, every single day, until you are out of reach.

Be patient, have no fear, and handle your oldies with the utmost care, You won’t know just when they will be gone.

For this a clue, I’d give, for you to chew over; What if a day will come; you too, will not be aware, of yourself and your cherished, dear?

I miss and love my “Tatay” so much! ( Tatay: Filipino endearment for daddy)

I am writing this brief poetry for him, to honor him for his coming birthday. And for all those who were taken early by Dementia and Alzheimer’s; and yes, for their caregivers, who need special care, too, and empathy.

Thank you so much for reading. Stay well and be good to your loved ones.

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