Summary

The article discusses the increasing intelligence of flies, particularly house flies, and the author's humorous and exasperated attempts to deal with them, culminating in the mention of a NASA-designed space-age fly swatter.

Abstract

The writer, situated in New Zealand during summer, humorously recounts the challenge of dealing with increasingly intelligent house flies. Despite the use of an odourless, one-shot fly spray, the flies evade extermination, leading the author to consider more drastic measures such as traditional swatting and electric fly swatters. The narrative escalates to the mention of NASA's STS-51-D mission, where astronauts attached homemade flyswatter devices to the shuttle's Remote Manipulator System, suggesting that even NASA has grappled with fly-related issues. The article concludes with the author's resignation to the flies' superior intellect, supported by a tongue-in-cheek search for the IQ of house flies, and a plug for the writer's other works and social media profiles.

Opinions

The author expresses frustration and a sense of being outsmarted by house flies, despite using a supposedly effective fly spray.
There is a comedic tone used to describe the flies' ability to avoid being sprayed, likening them to having telepathy or intelligence akin to a Jeff Goldblum character from the movie "The Fly."
The writer is skeptical about the effectiveness of traditional fly swatters and electric versions, especially given the flies' apparent cunning.
The author is amused and somewhat impressed by NASA's extreme solution to fly problems in space, using a specially designed "fly swatter" during the STS-51-D mission.
There is a hint of despair as the author admits to being still plagued by flies, with no immediate solution other than the onset of winter.
The article ends with a playful acknowledgment that flies might indeed be getting smarter, as suggested by the author's search results on house fly IQ, and a self-promotional call to action for readers to support the writer's work.

Nature

Flies Are Becoming More Intelligent

How come?

There’s an old joke about the idea that Australians will bet on anything, even two flies on a wall. Doing what? That question was never part of the joke, but maybe it’s something to do with which one comes first?

Ugh!

Well, I’m in the Antipodes as I write. Not Australia, but New Zealand, and it’s summer. Breakfast time, and the pesky house flies are back.

And they are defeating me. I have a can of fly spray handy and it’s not working.

Musca domestica is what they are called.

…believed to have evolved in the Cenozoic Era, possibly in the Middle East, and has spread all over the world as a commensal of humans. It is the most common fly species found in houses. — Wikipedia

Commensal?

Of, relating to, or characterized by a symbiotic relationship in which one species is benefited while the other is unaffected.

You have got to be shitting me!

Who benefits? Me or the effing flies? I’m certainly very affected by the critters.

I’ll get them yet!

Odourless and one shot

The aerosol spray is supposedly odourless and it’s labelled ‘One Shot’. These flies spent half their time living on a pile of shit and the spray makers worry about it being odourless?

Do the flies really care?

No way.

Telepathy?

I’ve noticed that recently these flies seem to know when I reach for the can, even if they are on the other side of the room.

Are they telepathic or just smart? Or scarier still, intelligent?

Like Jeff Goldblum escaped from the lab.

The Fly (1986) - IMDb

The Fly: Directed by David Cronenberg. With Jeff Goldblum, Geena Davis, John Getz, Joy Boushel. A brilliant but…

www.imdb.com

Wherever I aim the can, the bastard flies are not.

Whenever I aim the can, the fucking flies acquire a cloak of invisibility.

You know the saying

‘Eat shit — a hundred trillion flies cannot be wrong’.

And the bastards are laughing at me.

Beating the problem

Or, more accurately, swatting the buggers.

I don’t like the idea of swatting, of getting squashed fly on the breakfast table but I may have to start before I lose my mind.

But I’ll have to be careful around my wife as she wouldn’t appreciate a juicy dead fly in her hairdo. I’ve heard of ducks arse and beehive hairdos, but squashed fly? Never.

And with what’s available for swatting the fly doesn’t get squashed, it gets made into the fruit fly equivalent of french fries:

But that’s old tech you say.

Everyone’s going electric these days

Go electric!

What? play tennis with the bastards? I never heard of electric tennis, but I live on a boat and it’s hard to keep up with the technology.

I have been around these kinds of gizmos before in butchers’ shops and I would not like the smell of fried fly with my steak, thank you.

And I’m sure that if they are smart enough to avoid a can of fly spray, then they will certainly not respond to ‘Anyone for electric tennis, chaps?’

It’s the space age, stupid!

But now I’ve found the ultimate space-age solution. I do not know how the hell it works, but my research into solutions turned up this marvel, labelled

STS-51-D Fly Swatter.

Now that’s what I call a fly swatter.

Here’s another view:

Fly swatter in action. Image credit: Wikimedia

Just look at the size of that fly! It must be alien, in orbit around the earth.

So, it’s clear to me that I’m not the only one plagued by flies. NASA obviously had to design a special solution to the problem for the 16th flight of NASA’s Space Shuttle program.

Was Jeff Goldblum involved again?

No, apparently not. Two of the crew, Griggs and Hoffman, went walkabout in space to attach homemade “Flyswatter” devices to the shuttle’s Remote Manipulator System.

Jesus. That is really serious shit, out of this world.

But homemade? I find that hard to believe, although I know NASA has always had budget problems.

So, at the end of all that I’m still still plagued by flies, with no solution in sight, other than waiting for winter.

zzz there goes another one zzz.

But why the hell are they plaguing me? I just don’t understand it. After all we’re not anywhere near a trash tip and I did wash last week.

Maybe it’s something to do with the problems we’ve had with the electric toilet?

Celery Spoiled My Day…

…by causing an unpleasant snarl-up

medium.com

So, on balance, if it’s not me and if NASA is really on the case then I have to conclude that flies are surely getting smarter.

But, as one final check, I entered ‘house fly IQ’ into the search bar. And yes, there were results, but I cannot understand them. These flies really are smart.

LOC101892690 IQ and ubiquitin-like domain-containing protein [ Musca domestica (house fly) ]

Gene symbol LOC101892690 Gene description IQ and ubiquitin-like domain-containing protein Gene type protein coding…

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Help!

About me: I write on a variety of topics including humor, tech and travel, together with daily news events and the minutiae of daily life on a boat. I also write techno-thrillers…and about…

…insect plagues, genetics and the Space Shuttle

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