avatarBritni Pepper

Summary

The web content humorously discusses the concept of "snart" (simultaneous sneezing and farting) and explains the cosmic origins of farts, likening them to stardust.

Abstract

The article titled "How to Make Your Farts Sparkle" playfully explores the idea that when one sneezes and farts simultaneously, the body captures a "screenshot" of the moment, known colloquially as a "snart." It emphasizes the contrasting social reactions to sneezing and farting, particularly in the context of the pandemic. While sneezing is seen as a potential health hazard due to the spread of pathogens, farting, although socially frowned upon, is portrayed as a harmless act that brings pleasure to the farter. The author, quoting Carl Sagan, poetically notes that the elements composing farts, like the rest of the human body, are made of stardust from long-dead stars. This connection to the cosmos is used to frame flatulence in a positive light, suggesting that farting is a way of spreading star-born elements, including nitrogen, ammonia, methane, and carbon dioxide, across the world.

Opinions

  • The author finds humor in the idea of a "snart," a portmanteau of sneeze and fart.
  • The article implies that the social stigma against farting is unwarranted, especially when compared to the fear of pathogen spread through sneezing.
  • There is an opinion that farting can be seen as a pleasant experience for the individual, contrasting it with the negative perception of sneezing in public spaces.
  • The author shares a sense of wonder and connection to the universe by highlighting the cosmic origin of fart components, suggesting a romanticized view of a bodily function typically considered vulgar.
  • The piece humorously suggests that by farting, one is metaphorically "sprinkling the world with stardust," which is presented as a positive and enchanting action.

How to Make Your Farts Sparkle

I blow stardust from my bum. You can too!

Bless you! (CC image by Per Olesen)

Little known fact: if you sneeze and fart at the same time, your body takes a screenshot. Or at least that is what it feels like. Apparently this is known as a snart.

Do not do this in an elevator. That is just wrong on so many levels.

In the current pandemic climate, a sneeze is worse than a fart. You can empty a train carriage with a sneeze, but if you fart, your fellow travelers will say “Bless you!” even if the 9:09 now smells like a mediaeval mortuary.

Seriously, you sneeze, you spray pathogens out of your face at high velocity, sending droplets of horror up to eight metres, coating your victims without a chance to escape, and leaving death suspended in the air for up to eleven minutes.

But if you fart, no viruses are released, just gases which promote a feeling of pleasure and well-being in the donor.

But the most amazing fact, which you may share with those around you at the appropriate moment, is that farts are literally made of stardust.

The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff. ― Carl Sagan, Cosmos

Apart from the hydrogen atoms, of course, which may be left over from the Big Bang and have not transited through the interior of a star, unless it is someone like George Clooney or Kaley Cuoco.

But the rest — the nitrogen, the ammonia, the methane, the oxygen, and carbon dioxide, and the payload of hydrogen sulphide — are products of fusion cooking in the hearts of stars.

Farting is sprinkling the world with stardust, and that’s a good thing, right?

Britni

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