In the Kitchen with The Anxious Enthusiast
Fall Recipes: Gouda Grilled Cheese Sammies
Recipes for Anxious Chefs #9
Autumn sings to us the songs of the harvest, of plenty and promise, but also of change. My recipe for Gouda Grilled Cheese Sammies is a balm to the anxious belly. Whether you like to take a little heat with your sammie is up to you, but the delight of warmth is no option — it is a certainty.
This week has been hard. I write about anxiety and bravery, but sometimes I do not feel brave. Some weeks I do not feel brave.
I cope, of course. I do what I know is best for me. I try and sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t.
At midweek last week, I made a spectacular beef roast, the drippings and dregs of which I promised myself I would make vegetable beef soup.
At the end of the week last week, I tried to do this. It was an epic failure. As it was dinner that night, I ate it. Spoon after desperate spoon, I ingested the poorly-seasoned juice and unfit bits of veg into my disappointed maw.
It sustained me, but I wasn’t happy about it. I had been tired and exhausted, raw from emotion. When I am in this state, my creative juices do not flow.
I am an expert soup-maker. I can distinguish fine lines of flavor and add to them, blazing a path for the best ones to shine and extinguishing others that do not satisfy me. But when I am broken, drained, and desperate, I cannot taste to identify the subtle differences that yield the cozy, hearty, homely soups that I adore.
And so I took some time off. I shoved that trash soup to the back of the fridge and enjoyed my weekend. On Sunday, I sought to try again.
I was ready.
I was rested and armed with the most devilish of weapons, the grandest accompaniment to the tomato-based, vegetal, fall-driven soup, the ultimate seduction for the comfort-seeking, food-loving masses: the makings of proper grilled cheese sammies.
The promise of these sammies (read: sandwiches) was the impetus for what I can honestly say is one of the most fabulous vegetable beef soups I have ever made.
It is not in my learned nature to try again. I am putting in the work as an adult to reach a feeling of authentic acceptance of failure and to accomplish more joyful re-dos.
I’m not there. For now, I need an incentive. And these sammies are IT.
Let’s get in the kitchen.
The Recipe, Makes 2 Sammies
What you need for Gouda Grilled Cheese Sammies:
One Loaf of Sourdough Bread (I used Jalapeño Cheddar)
Salted Butter, 1–2 ounces
Gouda Cheese, 4-6 ounce portion
S&P
One Cutting Board & Bread Knife: unless you buy your bread pre-sliced. Bread knives are long and thin, with serrated edges for sawing through spongey bread middles without the effect of smushing them.
One Cheese Grater: like this one. Mine is older, but I have my eye on a rotary grater. A good cheese grater saves time and fingernails.
One Large, Low Skillet: mine is Teflon. With a lid or large ceramic plate to set on top.
One Spatula: sturdy and long is best. My good spatula broke, so I used two flimsy spatulas.
Loaf of Sourdough: our local market has the most delicious Jalapeño Cheddar Sourdough loaves. They are rotund, textural works of scored, flour-dusted art. Buy what you can, but if your market has a few parcels of this kind of cheesy, green-flecked heaven, give it a try. Browned in a sizzling pan with butter and gouda and you’ve got yourself a fall delicacy that will not disappear slowly.
Block of Gouda: grated cheese from the block is mega. When you buy pre-shredded cheese, you must deal with preservatives that keep your good cheese from melting properly. This recipe is quick, so buy a nice block of gouda from your local grocer or cheese artisan and shred it on demand for the meltiest of grilled cheeses.
Butter: a bit more than you think you need.
Salt & Pepper: just a few cracks of each, either inside of your grilled cheese before melting or over the top of your sammie when it is complete: brown, crispy, and sliced on a diagonal.
Step 1: Cheesiness
Take your block of cheese out of the fridge and grate enough for two sandwiches. Allow cheese to rest at room temperature for 15 minutes.
**Note: Room temperature cheese tastes better and melts more evenly.
Step 2: Sliced & Buttered Bread
Slice bread with a bread knife to your desired thickness. Slather one side of the bread with salted butter.
Step 3: A Hot Pan & Cheese Piled High
Place a large, low skillet on the stove and turn the heat to high. Add a small chunk of butter to the pan. When it begins to sizzle, distribute the butter around in the pan with your spatula and turn the heat down to just below medium.
Put a piece of bread in the skillet butter side down. Pile high with cheese. Top with the second piece of bread butter side up. Cover for 1–2 minutes.
Step 4: Finish & Serve
Uncover your delicious sammie, check for browny meltiness and flip so that the buttery top is the buttery bottom and the crispy, crunchy brown-butter bottom is the top. Cover for 1–2 minutes.
Remove from heat. Allow to rest on a clean cutting board or metal rack for 1–2 minutes to give time for maximum melting before cutting and serving.
Repeat with the second sandwich and serve warm. Bon Appetit!
Serving Options:
Serve it With Herbal Italian Vibes: adding a few leaves of fresh sage and a dusting of nutmeg on top of the gouda layer before the second piece of bread is perched on top for browning. For an herbal note that is entirely fall, an essence not unlike wafting a grand, steamy bowl of thanksgiving stuffing.
Serve it Extra Spicy: using chipotle mayo on the outside of the bread instead of butter for frying and cutting the gouda with part peppery, chili-laden cheese like pepper jack or rattlesnake cheese. For extra, extra heat, adding a few roasted red peppers or a thin stripe of chopped chipotles in adobo sauce to the inside of your grilled cheese pre-browning.
Serve it As an Appetizer: cutting slightly cooled sandwiches into fun shapes or triangles and arranging them beautifully on a platter for guests.
Serve it On Frigid Days As Gooey Croutons: chunking into small squares after the sandwiches have cooled slightly and dropping with tiny “plunks” into your favorite tomato soup.
Serve it Like The Anxious Enthusiast: as comfort food, to bring in the aromas of fall to her kitchen. Alongside rescued vegetable beef soup and her Lover. Enjoyed while watching the first movie of their Halloween/October movie marathon.
Please feel free to check out my profile: Brett Jenae Tomlin. Comment below if we have something in common, if you have anxiety or if you like what you’ve read. Do you have any questions for me?
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A Few More Articles for the Anxious Reader
More Fall Recipes: Easy Spaghetti Squash
On Comfort Food: Weekend Ratatouille
On Autumn: Equinox Love: A List of Mindful Ways to Feel Fall
On Wine: Ways I Wine Tour Like a Bossb*itch
On Sassy Self-Pleasure: When I Say “It’s My Pleasure” I Don’t Really Mean It
On Body Image: Summer Body, Part 1
