Everything You Ever Needed to Know about the 2016 Euros But Were Too Afraid to Ask

All broken down into nice easily digestible groups of five…

So Copa America whetted your appetite for great soccer but failed to deliver? You’ve come to the right place — the 2016 Euros are here. The stars have been saving themselves for this summer, and most of the world’s best teams will compete in a tournament that is more hotly contested than the World Cup.

The Euros are real, and they are spectacular.

The Euros start June 10th and run for a full month, so you’ve got a lot to learn and 52 glorious day games to watch. Below you’ll find at least one snippet about every team and a look at what to expect overall.

Everything is broken into nice easy sections so you can read it all at once, go section by section, or use Ctrl+F for the teams you’re watching.

5 reasons the Euros might be better than the World Cup

• Europe dominates the World Cup. The last 3 teams to hoist the Cup? Germany, Spain, and Italy. Nine of the twelve teams ever to make the finals are European, along with 27 of the last 36 semifinalists. At this point the World Cup is pretty much just The Euros!! ft. Brazil and Argentina.
• There are few easy outs. Albania is the worst team here, #42 in the FIFA rankings. Copa America Centenario has 6 teams (of 16) ranked worse than that. Each World Cup has 9 teams (of 32) from Oceania, Africa, and Asia. Albania is ranked higher than all but 5 teams from those continents.
• The domestic rivalries are great. Some teams like England, Germany, and Russia are loaded with guys that compete all year but are now teaming up. Many will play opponents they play with all year, so there’s plenty of inside information and domestic bragging rights at stake.
• The historical rivalries are even better. Ever heard of World War I or II? Many of these countries don’t exactly get along. The Balkans are still the tinderbox of Europe. Remember the USSR? Some those splintered countries literally aren’t allowed to play each other because it’s not safe. And these countries play each other over and over in qualifying and Euros and World Cup and “friendlies.” They hate each other.
• Germany and Spain appear to be on a crash course to the final. They’re the last two World Cup champs, they’re co-favorites here, and they’re the best two teams in the world. Here’s hoping they meet up.

5 rules for the 2016 European Championship

• The Euros happen every four years on the even years between World Cups. This year’s host is France.
• The tourney expanded from 16 to 24 teams this year for the first time, which still excludes more than half of the 53 European nations.
• The 24 teams are split into six groups of four. Each team plays the other teams in its group once, round-robin style.
• The top two teams from each group move on. Four of the six third place teams also advance. So yes, group stage eliminates few but it also ranks the teams which determines the knockout draw.
• The final 16 teams compete in a single-elimination knockout tourney to determine the champion. If a knockout match is tied, there’s 30 minutes of extra time, then penalty kicks if needed.

5 nations you won’t find at the 2016 Euros

• Netherlands: The Dutch choked in qualifying, not even making a playoff. This is a team that finished top 3 at the last two World Cups and won Euros in ’88. It won’t be the same without the Oranje.
• Bosnia & Herzegovina: Everyone’s favorite ’14 World Cup sleeper lost to Ireland in the Euro playoff.
• Denmark: ’92 Euro champs are always a feisty tournament out.
• Greece: The last non-Spanish Euro champs had their shock win in ‘04.
• Serbia: Winners of the recent under-20 World Cup, they got next.

5 teams you can safely check out on

• Albania: Albania is the worst team here. They almost never score. They aren’t good. But hey, they’ll always have Mother Teresa.
• Hungary: Hungary was the World Cup runner-up in both ‘38 and ’54 but this is their first major tournament in thirty years.
• Ireland: Ireland’s best player Robbie Keane plays in the MLS so. They block an incredible 24% of opponents’ shots, but they probably won’t last.
• Northern Ireland: Most of their players are in the English Championship. The conceded the highest % of opponent shots and 50% of their goals from inside the 6-yard box in qualifying. Just too many big chances.
• Slovakia: Marek Hamsik and Martin Skrtel look like guys you definitely don’t want to run into in an enclosed alley (above). Slovkia plays rough and tough but got a bad draw.

5 reasons to watch the minnows

• Iceland / Gylfi Sigurdsson: Sigurdsson is a midfield maestro who usually plies his trade for Swansea. He’ll be all over the field leading Iceland in their first major tournament and his free kicks are dynamite.
• Sweden / Zlatan Ibrahimovic: Sweden barely qualified, fouling the most of any team and allowing the second most goals, but all of that basically means they constantly need Ibra to do superhero things. And as one of the most incredibly talented forwards in the world, he frequently does.
• Turkey / Arda Turan: Turkey scored first in 9 of their 10 qualifying matches and has an interesting draw, but they’ll go as far as Arda Turan takes them. Turan is the metronome in midfield by which the Turks tick. He moved to Barcelona this year; he’ll need to do more for Turkey.
• Ukraine / Andriy Yarmolenko: Ukraine trailed in 27% of their minutes, most of any team here. 17 of their 23 guys play for three Ukrainian rivals so this could be interesting. They’ll need Yarmolenko’s crazy dribbling and creativity to open things up in a group that should see a lot of goals.
• Wales / Gareth Bale: Wales used 6 different formations in 10 qualifying games, and each of them revolved around Bale’s all-world talent and getting him in space to run at guys or shoot from anywhere. It’s a team that has truly learned how to play around one superstar.

5 Cinderella teams that could make a surprise semifinal run

• Austria: Austria plays in the most wide-open group and were dominant in qualifying. Built around the all-world play of David Alaba (below) and forwards Janko and Arnautovic, Austria is extremely patient. They took the fewest long shots and the most from inside the 6-yard box, patiently passing the ball until the final deadly touch presented itself. Austria hasn’t escaped a World Cup group since ’82 and has never even won a match at Euros. It’s time for that to change.
• Croatia: Croatia has never made it past Euro quarterfinals, but this may be their most talented team ever. Their midfield is loaded with Modric (below), Rakitic, and Perisic leading the way and Madzukic up front to knock the goals home. Plus, they have the best jerseys in soccer (above). If the defense can hold up, this team could go a long way — but they got a tough draw so it could be more pain.
• Iceland: This is Iceland’s first international tournament ever and the nation is hyped. They’ve been drawn into the most open group so there’s a real chance here. Also every single player on the roster has a name ending in -son including star Sigurdsson (above). So there’s that.
• Poland: Poland finished a point behind Germany in qualifying. They’ll keep jersey makers busy with players like Lewandowski (below), Szczesny, Błaszczykowski, and Krychowiak and they should keep stat trackers busy too. Poland averaged 3.3 goals scored, most of any team, scoring on almost half of their shots on target — while also allowing the second most goals too. Poland matches could be among the most entertaining in the tournament, but at some point all those goals allowed will bite back.
• Wales: For a nation as populous as Tampa-St. Pete, Wales sure can produce soccer talent. Swansea’s Ashley Williams anchors a defense that allowed only 4 goals in 10 matches, and Aaron Ramsey bosses the midfield with star Gareth Bale (above) leading the scoring effort. Wales play tight defense, tied for 69% of their qualifying minutes (most of anyone), relying on a moment of magic late to keep the dream alive. They had only 4 goal scorers, fewest of any team, and scored on just 22% of their shots, worst of anyone, but they have a knack for finding a way. This may be the highest variance team in the entire tournament.

5 teams that are fool’s gold

• Czech Republic: This team is pretty terrible defensively. They allowed the most shots on target of any team and gave up an incredible seven goals by header, four more than any other team. They were a perennial contender not long ago, but this team looks ready to Czech (Cech?) out early.
• Italy: These aren’t the 4x World Cup champs. After their ’06 win, Italy had only one win at the last two WCs combined. This Italian midfield is missing the ageless Pirlo and injured Marchisio and Veratti, so it is surprisingly thin, and the defense is not what it once was. The Italians allowed 86% of their goals in the first half, including 67% in the first 15 minutes, both highest of any team, so they can be gotten to early.
• Romania: Romania was unbeaten in qualifying, allowing only two goals in ten matches, best of anyone. They just had a 20 match unbeaten streak during which they allowed only 6 goals. The problem is they struggle tos core too and seem doomed to be eliminated 1–0 or 0–0 in penalties.
• Russia: Russia has only made it past group stage once in World Cup or Euros. 20 of the players are on five Russian rival clubs, so the players are quite familiar. Russia plays an aggressive style both on offense and defense. They caught opponents offside more than any other team, but that can come back to bite them too. They should be a fun watch.
• Switzerland: The Swiss made it out of 3 of their last 4 World Cup groups but have never made it past group stage in Euros, even when they hosted. Shaqiri and Xhaka are midfield studs and the Swiss tend to keep games close and hope to steal it, with 75% of their goals scored in the second half, highest of anyone. I want to like this team but I guess I’m… neutral.

5 strong teams built around a transcendent superstar

• Austria / David Alaba: Alaba is one of Pep Guardiola’s multipurpose toys. He’s a left back for Bayern Munich but can play any defensive position or anywhere in the midfield and even turns into an attacking winger at times. He’ll likely take on a bit of everything for an Austria team that needs every bit of his versatility.
• Croatia / Luca Modric: Modric is one of a handful of stars for Croatia, but he’s the one that shines brightest. His creativity, dribbling, and pace set the tone for the team, and it’s his final touch that so often opens things up for the entire squad just as it does for Real Madrid.
• France / Paul Pogba: Pogba is a young LeBron James on the field, a physical machine that can tear through defenders from one end of the pitch to the other. At 23 he’s already a superstar, yet it feels like he’s still just beginning to harness his incredible abilities. He can affect the whole game without even scoring, and yet those rare goals are absolutely exquisite too. Pogba could win player of the tournament and Juventus could find a world record sum waiting if they’re willing to sell.
• Poland / Robert Lewandowski: Lewandowski may be the best pure forward in the world, the guy you want making the final touch near the net if you can get him the ball. This is a guy that scored 5 goals in just 9 minutes against top German opponent Wolfsburg.
• Portugal / Cristiano Ronaldo: Maybe you’ve heard of him? There’s almost no one as talented — yet it never feels like Ronaldo can push his national team to the next level. Portugal have disappointed at World Cups but have made 4 Euro semifinals. It’s a top-heavy team, and they have earned their reputation as floppers, drawing the most fouls in qualifying. They’ll need Ronaldo magic to carry them as always.

5 contenders to win it all

• Belgium: The Belgians are ranked #2 but on the verge of going from trendy sleeper to overrated team that hasn’t won anything yet. Belgium has only won a knockout game at two World Cups and never more than one game at Euros. But this Belgium may have the most complete starting lineup of any nation here. They are loaded defensively even if their top four defenders all usually play centerback. Courtois is a stud in the net, and the midfield is stacked with attacking options Hazard, de Bruyne, Dembele, and Mertens, with Fellaini and Witsel set to dominate the airspace and hang back in defense. The one big question is which forward gets the nod, and can Lukaku, Benteke, or Origi produce consistently? For all their talent, Belgium tend to make things hard on themselves. They take over half their shots from outside the box, by far the most of any team, and they draw the fewest fouls as well — both inexcusable for a team this talented. Can Belgium put it all together?
• England: This is a veritable EPL all-star squad — but one that is missing its very best stars. This is a newer, younger team, the first England without Lampard and Gerrard in two decades. And maybe that’s ok. England has made it past the World Cup quarters twice, and just twice in the Euro semifinals too — and two of those four times were while hosting. Still, it’s hard not to talk yourself into this English squad being different. They ran rampant in qualifying, second in both shots and goals per game as well as in goals allowed, just 3 in 10 games. They trailed for only 2% of their qualifying minutes! Young players like Dier and Alli are starting to make their mark, and Kane is a star forward. But will Roy Hodgson let his kids play? And where will Wayne Rooney play — if he plays at all? Will England finally show up?
• France: France won the World Cup in ’98 and is a two-time European champion, but they’ve been out by the quarterfinals in four straight tourneys and stuck in a state of disarray the last few years — but not for lack of talent. The midfield is absurdly stacked with Pogba, Matuidi, Payet, Cabaye, and Kante among the top choices, and there are three unique options up front in Griezmann, Giroud, and Martial. This is an incredibly versatile squad that has a weak group and home field advantage, so there are no more excuses. France’s relative youth could be good or bad here. The one older area? The likely starting defense will all be 30+ years old and is clearly the big question mark. Will the D hold up? Can the French settle on a striker choice? Will the hosts go all the way?
• Germany: Germany is the world soccer superpower. 4-time World Cup champion, they’ve made it to the semifinals in 12 of the last 16 WCs. They’ve also been to 8 of 11 Euro semifinals — but have only won the tournament once. They’re defending world champs now and that could all change under genius manager Joachim Low. The midfield is dynamic. Expect Kroos and Khedira to be mainstays surrounded by waves of attacking options in Ozil, Schurrle, Draxler, Gotze, Sane, and others with Muller somehow always in the right spot to score the key goal up front. Germany’s defense is full of versatility too, including all-world keeper Neuer. Hummels will anchor the line at center back but he’ll play with guys like Boateng, Howedes, and Can who all push up the pitch at times and leave the defense exposed, struggles that sometimes came up in qualifying. Will the team miss the steadying hand of Lahm and Mertesacker on the back line? Can Low pick the right 11, and can Germany win the double?
• Spain: Spain bookended a World Cup win with two Euro titles, but it all fell apart in an embarrassing group stage exit in ‘14. A deep run here could solidify them among world soccer powers, but another early out could leave Spain as the product of an era. They were dominant in qualifying, scoring first in 9 of 10 matches and leading in 67% of their qualifying minutes, best by far. The Spanish are deadly with an early lead, passing the ball around effortlessly while the opponent tires. Opposing teams saw under 10% of their shots on target, lowest among all teams. Spain’s midfield is still dominant, though perhaps not what it once was as Iniesta and Fabregas begin to slow down. Still Koke and Thiago add new life and this is a squad that left Isco, Mata, Saul, and Cazorla off of the roster completely, an embarrassment of midfield riches. The defense is somehow even better with the best starting four in the world in Jordi Alba, Sergio Ramos, Pique, and Juanfran. Still Vicente del Bosque has two big questions. Who mans the net, Casillas or da Gea? And who will score up top? Will it be the veteran Pedro or an untested Morata or Vazquez — or will Spain try the false 9 that has left them wanting at times? Possession is great, but someone has to put the ball into the net. Spain’s middle 9 are the best in the world, but they need the guy at the front and the one at the back to come through if they’re to win it all.

5 group games that should be fun

• England vs Russia (Group B) June 11: Both teams should come out aggressive and this one promises to be very engaging and entertaining.
• Croatia vs Turkey (D) June 12: In a group with Spain, there’s extra pressure between these two teams vying for second. The midfield match-up here will be fantastic.
• England vs Wales (B) June 16: Wales finally gets a shot at big bro. You better believe both sides had this one circled since the day of the draw.
• Germany vs Poland (C) June 16: These countries have a “complicated” history. Plus Germany’s national team is basically Bayern Munich minus star Polish forward Robert Lewandowski. Bad blood anyone?
• Italy vs Sweden (E) June 17: Both of these teams are built around older players trying for one last shot, and both will desperately need this win. Ibra against an entire Italian 11 should be something to behold.

5 group games you should pay extra attention to

• Belgium vs Italy (E) June 13: If Belgium is the new guard and Italy are on their way out, they need to give notice from the get-go.
• Portugal vs Austria (F) June 18: Group F is the one group without one of the top 5 contenders, and these are the top two teams so this match determines the de facto 6th contender.
• Wales vs Russia (B) June 20: England should qualify, which means these two teams could be playing for one spot. Is it the end for the Welsh?
• Poland vs Ukraine (C) June 21: If Germany takes care of business, they should be coasting to a group win leaving these two neighboring rivals with their own history to duke it out for second.
• Spain vs Croatia (D) June 21: This could be the key match of the entire group stage if Group D is still up for grabs. The Group D runner-up probably has to beat Belgium, Germany, and then France just to make the finals. The group winner avoids them all, safely on the other side of the bracket. It would be disaster for Spain to lose.

5 teams that will surprise — for better or for worse

• Portugal will disappoint. In a weak group they should still advance but the team just isn’t balanced enough to make a real run.
• Belgium dominates in groups… but then disappear. It feels like this young squad still isn’t quite ready for the biggest stage.
• Italy never really gets it going. The Italians will stick around a bit like they always do, but it doesn’t seem like the right team and might be time for a youth movement.
• England somehow looks awesome and disappoints all at once. I sense some inconsistency coming for a young squad and an unsettled lineup. Could it be more heartbreak in penalties on the horizon?
• Wales makes the quarterfinals. I’m all in on Wales, quirky long shot that they are. The defense is stout, and Bale finishes among the top 5 scorers.

5 fearless predictions

• Host France struggles early but gets it going before losing to Germany in penalties. Group A isn’t strong, but there will be a lot of defense and the youth and home pressure of the Euros could equate to a slow start. They’re too talented not to make a run at home, but it ends in the semis.
• Austria wins Group F and makes a run to the semifinals. Why Austria? The group is open, the talent is there, and the time is right.
• Spain will have the easiest path to the final… but will blow it anyway. Spain could see the bracket open up in their favor with all of the other contenders likely to be on the other half, leaving a wide open trip to the finals. But I can’t talk myself into them finding enough goals to get there.
• The final will feature an underdog not among the top 5 contenders. The top half of the bracket opens up with a Spain loss, and someone unexpected will make it all the way to the finals before losing.
• Germany win the title! The world champions extend their domination to the Euros, peaking at the right time in knockout like they always seem to and finding just enough magic to finish the job.

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