Summary

Earnest and Mable conspire to send their nephew Jr. on a wild goose chase for "double-wide toilet paper" to enjoy some alone time.

Abstract

In a humorous short story, Mable seeks her nephew Jr., whom Earnest has sent to town on a fictitious errand to find "double-wide toilet paper," allowing the couple to spend a romantic afternoon together. Earnest has even provided Jr. with a packed lunch to extend his absence. Later, they plan to send Jr. to a distant town, Spencer, under the same pretense, ensuring they'll have more time to themselves, much to their amusement.

Opinions

The author uses the idea of "double-wide toilet paper" to add humor, highlighting the naivety of Jr.
Earnest and Mable are portrayed as a mischievous couple who enjoy each other's company and are willing to play a trick on Jr. for their benefit.
The story suggests a playful and endearing relationship between the couple, as they collaborate on the ruse and delight in their time together.
The author likely intends to entertain the reader with a light-hearted tale of deception and romance.
The mention of buying the author a coffee via Ko-Fi indicates a desire for reader support and appreciation for the author's creative work.
The closing tagline "Wackemall" and the suggestion to continue with another story, "Throwin’ Rocks," implies that these characters and their humorous escapades are part of a series.

Double-wide

When push comes to shove you just have to do whatever it takes to get what you want out of life…

Previously, It Is What It Is.

“Have you seen Jr?” Mable asked, “I been lookin’ for him all mornin’.”

“I told him his big Uncle Joe Big is comin’ to visit,” Earnest answered, “an’ he needed to go to town and find some double-wide toilet paper.”

“But there ain’t no such thing as double-wide toilet paper,” Mable replied.

“You and I know that,” Earnest chuckled, “Jr don’t.”

“How long you reckon afore he gets home?” Mable questioned as she placed the dishes on the table.

“He’ll come home when he gets hungry.” Earnest chuckled.

“Well then he should be here any minute,” Mable said.

“I don’t think so,” Earnest laughed.

“Why not?” Mable asked, a perplex look on her face.

“I gave him a bag lunch,” Ernest grinned.

“I love you,” Mable giggled, “We’ve go the whole afternoon to ourselves. What you reckon we’re going to do with all that time alone?”

“I was hoping,” Earnest answered in earnest, “it might be something we ain’t done in a long time.”

“I was hoping you’d say that,” Mable giggled.

Hours later Mable whispered in his ear, “Honey, it’s almost supper time. We need to be getting dressed afore Jr gets here.”

“I reckon so,” Earnest mumbled as he tossed back the sheets and turned to get out of the bed.”

“So what about tomorrow?” Mable asked.

“I thought I’d send him to Spencer since everyone local don’t have no double-wide toilet paper.”

“But that’s liable to take him a week or more,” Mable asked with concern, “are you sure he’ll be alright?”

“He will be if you pack him enough to eat,” Earnest chuckled.

“I’ll pack him aplenty,” Mable loudly laughed, “aplenty!”

If you enjoyed this short story then why not buy me a cup of coffee via Ko-Fi so I can afford to continue doing these kinds of stories.

Remember, don’t just Whack ’em, Wackemall.

Continue with Throwin’ Rocks.