Do You Have a Copy of “Henry Winkler and the Chocolate Factory?”

The Crazy, Mixed -Up Book Titles People Ask Librarians For

Part of a librarian’s job is helping people find a book that they’ve read or heard about. But sometimes our patrons get the title wrong. For instance? The woman who came to the library asking for a copy of “The Night Weasel.”

What book did she actually want? Night, by Elie Wiesel.

Here’s a list of actual messed-up book titles people have asked librarians for:

Hillbilly Allergy

The Great Raspy

Downtown Abbey

Less Miss Rabbles

Where the Crayfish Are

Nap of a Salesman

The Killer Mockingbird

The Count of Monte Crisco

Catcher in the Pie

Pride and Prejudice, by Erica Jong.

The Brothers Carry Matzoh

The Clan of the Care Bears

The Communist Manifestation

The Satanic Vices

Anne of the Seven Gables

Henry Winkler and the Chocolate Factory

Diarrhea of a Wimpy Kid

To Kill a Mockingjay

Grape Expectations

Madam’s Ovaries

A Sale of Two Titties

Crazy With Asians

Any book by Willa Catheter

If you can’t remember the exact title of the book you want? Not to worry. We can usually figure out what you’re looking for. And we promise not to crack a smile — until after you’ve left the library.

( Writing Coach and editor-for-hire Roz Warren writes for everyone from the Funny Times to the New York Times, and is the author of Our Bodies, Our Shelves: A Collection of Library Humor, and Just Another Day At Your Local Public Library. If you want to buy inscribed copies, ask her to speak at your library’s next “In Service” day, or just want to say hi, you can reach her at [email protected])