Dear Cisters: How do you voice concerns about trans people without getting lumped in with the transphobes? (Ten Trans Questions #7)
No one has ever heard this question before, so let’s work through it together
Welcome to Dear Cisters, the column that’s more like Dear Abby than the Savage Lovecast. I’m your host, transgender writer/editor/nerd Stephenie Magister.
Today’s topic comes from all the people who argue why someone doesn’t deserve to be called a bigot.
Especially not because they said something bigoted!
NOTE: (this article is expanded from an excerpt of the full TEN TRANS QUESTIONS)
DEAR CISTERS,
I’m so sick of people lumping JK Rowling in with the transphobes.
Well, they didn’t exactly call her a transphobe.
They pointed out how bigoted her positions on trans people are. But isn’t that the same as calling her a bigot?
They pointed out the harmful, abusive impact her words and actions have toward all sorts of women, whether those women have had transgender experiences or not.
So they didn’t exactly call her a transphobe.
But by pointing out the bigoted impact of JK Rowling’s actions, isn’t that the same thing as CALLING her a bigot?
Sincerely,
Sexist Egalitarian, Existential Mist of Externalities
Dear SEE ME,
You are confusing a person’s identity with their position.
Your position can be transphobic even if “you” are not.
Your position can be transphobic even if based on facts.
If you’re a progressive/liberal/reading this article, you probably got red (or green) in the face every time a friend or family member refused to acknowledge the racist impact of their position or behavior. They don’t identify as a racist — what a horrifying label, eh? — so the conversation ends there.
Labeling your position as racist or transphobic or whatever isn’t to indicate malice on anyone’s part. It’s to indicate that regardless of your intentions, your position has transphobic effects that hurt actual trans people.
Most racists don’t host shows on Fox News and run around with Tiki torches. They’re normal, decent people who never move beyond questions of IDENTITY. They get so caught up in whether they are a good person that they never find out what comes next.
Deciding you’re a good person isn’t the end of your journey. It’s the beginning.
Bigotry isn’t some seed to find and eradicate in us, never to be found again. You get rid of it in one way, you discover it remains within you in an undiscovered form. As even those of us among the most marginalized have discovered, there are always others who experience oppression in ways we never knew we took for granted.
There is no switch to flip that instantly transforms you into a different or better person. Jesus can connect you to your worthiness (I personally pray to Gwen Stacy), but it’s up to you to cultivate that worthy person day by day.
That process never ends. New kinds of people and the ways in which they are oppressed manifest all the time. But that’s not a bad thing. It is, as the tech boys say, a feature. Not a glitch.
THE END
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