be slick not thick — add a graphic kick & READ THE CAPTIONS
What’s a Click-Pic? Rhymes with Dick Pic
It’s the latest annoying MuddyUm shtick
May 2023 update: We have two official branding pics, the classic 𝚁𝚄𝙽𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚆𝙸𝚃𝙷 𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝚁𝙴 scissors and the anorexic white cat.
Andrew’s AI now adds them automagically at the bottom of stories published here.
For the month of June, Mudditors’ click-pics were this Pride image, which others were free to use if they wished — we didn’t want to force it on anyone.
Why did the Captain Behind the Curtain mandate click-pics?
Because there’s no place like MuddyUm.
Susan Brearley wants all the clicks for herself and for *your* Muddy stories. Branding is a fine sort of selfishness. All Muddy writers benefit when our publication acquires new followers and subscribers to the Real Dirty Muddy Newsletter.
Misguided algorithmic magic may suggest other pubs’ Articles To Read Next, which tickᵉᵈ off Susan. To keep readers on MuddyUm, she initially asked Mudditors to try adding a link like this at story-end.
Credit David B. Clear + me for adding hassle — err, optic to the Cap’n’s flare of expanding branding brilliance. In May I saw two custom pictures in his comic in Muddy’s queue, which clicked!, so exclaimed on Slack,
LOOK at these pictures. How did David do that?
My notion was, writers could customize the click-pic visually to match their topic in a way that adds humor.
As it transpired, Susan had higher-level marketing plans for advertising Muddy & *you* consistently via audience development links & fishing for readers with three box-linked, click-baity Muddy worms — writer’s choice.
Our Resident Techie Andrew Rodwin was Slacking and quick-quick evictᵉᵈ the mystery. Did he ask David how he did that? Occurred to me later, *I* could’ve asked David.
Andrew may’ve shared his screen encouragingly the next Monday while Mudditors discussed the new click-pic-shtick, but Carol & I were plotting to figure out what he meant on our own. I know he announced, all you need to do is …
spreadsheet mumble click-clack paddy-wack blah blah google drive something
That’s why Susan added that tricky-dicky click-pic plank for us to walk. We’ve been explaining how ever since. You’ll thank her later. Feel free to follow these instructions to make your own images clickable, but Andrew’s AI now inserts MuddyUm’s branding image for you.
Captain Obvious points out,
If you copy an existing click-pic, it won’t still be clickable. That’s why Andrew emphasized Do steps 3–6 every time you insert the image into an article. Hovering over an image with your cursor shows its associated link. On my PC, the link appears in a black box on drafts and a grey box on published stories.
MuddyUm supports poetically licensed rhyming.
I learned the following in the course of discussing click-pics with Mac-user Carol Lennox⤵︎
- control-click is the Mac equivalent of PC right-clicking
- Mac users can right-click on their mouse or trackpad by enabling the secondary click function in System Preferences
If you have questions, please ask Andrew, not this action-flick chick techie-hick. Finding the Mac info online was interesting though.
☠️ B r a n d i n g 🦜
But but but — disclaimer
The Cap’n lets me customize a click-pic when I feel needy ’cause I begged & complained “but it was my idea!” until she caved. That’s either leading by example or letting me learn from my mistakes?
After Susan said I didn’t always have to use our standard branding, I felt less craving to customize. That’s how my brain works.
She relies upon *your* stories to promote 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕄𝕦𝕕𝕕𝕪𝕌𝕞 𝕓𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕕 in the classic manner, so don’t expect equivalent leeway.
The tail end of Elo N. Musky’s story depicᵗˢ Muddy’s Big Branding Bang prehistory. Clearly, click-pics rule. Dick-pics drool.
It irks my quirks that Muddy’s click-pics mostly feel dark or intense, vaguely threatening. Don’t we want to welcome and include humor light & lite? I’m thinking piratical boobs in a flowered bikini — Amy Sea to consult — or a nice cheerful parrot, against a millennial pink background.
Some writers might welcome a click-pic without the ﾒﾒﾒ grog bottle.🍾⁽ʰⁱᶜ⁾
Or a square, button-style Muddy-red grog bottle, urging 𝙲𝚕𝚒𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝙳𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙺 𝙼𝙴 — also against millennial pink?
Hey! How about Liza, my two-faced poodle? Note her lack of angst compared to the anorectic white cat.
Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Clickable
Oh all right — Gadzooks — have it your way, Cap’n. “Feast or famine” is my motto. Hello darkness, my old friend. I’ve come to click with you again. Let’s find out whether Susan approves of linking to subsets of Muddy stories.
Traditionalists may recall our first-generation click-pics, including one not-so-dark, the cheerfully playful psychedelic button.
