Summary

A married sex addict reflects on her affair with her first love, Jack, experiencing a mix of emotions and justifying her actions due to her husband's lack of interest, leading to a complex marital dynamic.

Abstract

The narrative "Chronicles of a Married Sex Addict: After the Hook Up (Book One, Part Five)" delves into the protagonist's intimate encounter with Jack, her first love, following a period of marital estrangement. She grapples with feelings of relief, fulfillment, and guilt after the hookup, rationalizing her actions by her husband Ben's emotional and sexual neglect. Despite the thrill of the affair, she confronts the reality of her situation, including the need to maintain her double life. The story ends with a cliffhanger, hinting at the continuation of her affair with Jack and the potential for further complications in her marriage.

Opinions

The protagonist feels that her needs are not being met in her marriage, leading to her seeking fulfillment elsewhere.
She believes that her husband Ben would likely have behaved similarly if faced with a comparable situation.
The protagonist perceives her affair with Jack as less transient or superficial compared to a casual hookup due to their history.
She experiences a range of emotions post-affair, including happiness and guilt, and ultimately decides to accept her actions.
The protagonist notes Ben's hypocrisy when he expects her to be available for sex despite his years of neglecting her needs.
She is aware of the irony in Ben's sudden interest in her activities after years of disregard.
The protagonist reflects on the possibility that Ben's attraction to her has diminished, as he seems to only desire her in the dark.
She ends the day with anticipation for her next meeting with Jack, indicating the ongoing nature of the affair.

Chronicles of a Married Sex Addict: After the Hook Up (Book One, Part Five)

No regrets to new beginnings

**Author’s note: This is book one, part five in a series of articles. To start from the beginning, go to https://readmedium.com/chronicles-of-a-sex-addict-the-beginning-7a8b72d29a86. Missed a story? Go to the chapter listing page: https://readmedium.com/chronicles-of-a-married-sex-addict-chapter-listing-5cf51f0d2715**

We caught our breath for a moment and stayed intertwined while I felt him pulse inside me and soften. Finally, I said, “Back to reality, love” and had to dismount. As we separated and made ourselves presentable to the world again, I left my ripped panties on the table as a reminder of our time together. He held me in his arms and kissed me again before we said goodbye. I slipped out the door like a ninja, hoping no one in the parking lot saw me leave.

I wasn’t sure how to feel on that half hour drive home. I felt a sense of relief, fulfillment, happiness, but also guilt as I tried to come to terms with what my life had become. In less than 24 hours, I went from crying in the bathtub over a husband that no longer wanted me to elation in sexual conquest. Finally, I decided to just be okay with myself. I have needs like everyone else and the person that I wanted to fulfill those needs didn’t want me. What else could I do? What would Ben do if our roles were reversed? He’d do the exact same thing. I was pretty sure he already had at least one affair during our marriage. Maybe that’s why it was so easy to slip into this. Jack isn’t an ordinary man either. He was my first love and I still felt a strong connection to him. Somehow that feels less trashy than a barfly hook up.

I got home around 8:30 p.m. and Ben wasn’t home yet with the girls. I showered away all the evidence of tonight’s adventure and poured a glass of red wine before snuggling down in bed to wait for their return. I started thumbing through Facebook and a message appeared from Jack. It read:

Jack: “Thanks for the ‘coffee’. Hope to repeat it again soon.”

Me: “Ditto.”

Jack: “Meet me at noon?”

Me: “At your store?”

Jack: “Yes.”

Me: “See you then.”

Ben messaged from the car asking me to come get one of the girls. We tucked them into bed and caught up on his day. Then the questions started…

Ben: “How was coffee?”

Me: “I actually didn’t go.”

Ben: “Why not?”

Me: “It just ended up not working out.”

Ben: “Oh. So what did you do then?”

Me: “Had dinner and went to Barnes and Noble.” That wasn’t a lie as I did that before I saw Jack.

Ben: “Anything else?”

Me: “Well I came home, showered, and here we are.”

Ben seemed to be in a weird mood and oddly interested in my day. He hadn’t asked me about my day in a long time. I drank my wine as we chatted and then turned over to fall asleep. That’s when Ben turned off the tv and reached over to rub my lower back. He moved his hands up and down all over my body, massaging my back, legs, ass, and then slid his hand to the front of my panties. It felt good, but I obviously wasn’t interested. He flipped me over onto my back and started to pull off my panties. I said, “It’s late and I’m tired.” He was not happy with the rejection, which led to this fun dialog:

Ben: “You mean, you’re actually not in the mood for a change?”

Me: “Welcome to my past three years.”

Ben: “It hasn’t been three years.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I meant 34 months.”

He grabbed a blanket and pillow before he stormed off to the couch. Apparently, it was okay for him to disregard my needs for years, but he couldn’t take one rebuff. When I thought about it afterward, I realized that it was indeed my body that he didn’t like anymore. He only wanted me in the dark... I fell fast asleep and slept like a milk-drunk baby, dreaming of the day’s events and wondering what tomorrow would bring with Jack… Continue to Part Six: https://link.medium.com/lkKpBPnkcwb.

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