MEDIUM HUMOR
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A Deer Gets Lucky — And You Are There!
I was looking for a photo to illustrate a fairly dry article about the fact that the Pennsylvania legislature is thinking of raising revenue by taxing all the packages being delivered to resident’s porches.
I put the term “Amazon package” in Medium’s photo search engine and got a bunch of perfectly appropriate images. Like this one:
And this one:
And then?
On the 5th page of search results, the search engine presented me with a photo of two deer fucking.
So naturally I jettisoned my article about the PA legislature to address the all- important question of why on earth did a search for packages left on doorsteps result in a photo of animals having sex??
I don’t see any connection here. Am I missing something?
If this some kind of a joke? Does Medium randomly seed its photo search results with photos of animals having sex? And if so, why? Just for laughs? Because they can? To see if we’re actually paying attention?
To delve into this issue further, I decided to ask the Photo Search Engine for photos of animals having sex.
The result?
If you actually search for “animals having sex?”
You get photos like this:
And this:
I have no idea what that Water Slide billboard has to do with animal intercourse.
And while those two dudes jumping on the beach look like they are having some kind of fun? That’s so not what animals — human or otherwise — having sex actually looks like.
To summarize. Ask Medium for photos of packages being delivered and you’ll get a photo of Bambi getting laid. Ask Medium for photos of animals making whoopie and you’ll get photos of everything but animals making whoopie.
Basically there is no real point to this Medium essay except to share the news that a Medium photo search can be funny as hell, and that when you ask for photos about a particular topic, the search engine might, while providing you with plenty of suitable and appropriate images, inexplicably throw in random shit that makes absolutely no sense.
The takeaway? (This is a Medium essay. There always needs to be a takeaway.)
Life is full of surprises!
The other takeaway?
You can get a Medium essay out of almost anything.
Writing Coach Roz Warren can help you improve and publish your work. Roz writes for everyone from the Funny Times to the New York Times, has been in 15 Chicken Soup for the Soul collections, and has published 15 books, including a collection of library humor called Our Bodies, Our Shelves. Drop her a line at [email protected]. (That’s Ros with an “s,” not a “z.”)