Bottom Line: No Hitting

In response to Dancing Elephants Press Relationship Column

She said to me, “You have got to be kidding.” I was hurt, embarrassed, full of shame, and some emotions I couldn’t even identify.

How It Started

I was single and at a girlfriend's home. We were having a discussion that was not heated but intense. Suddenly, she made it about religion. She made a few statements that were completely baseless. I attempted to correct her while talking; I was preparing guacamole and had my back turned to her for a moment.

She finished her tirade, and I turned around just in time for her to kick me in a man’s least favorite spot to be hit. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her hand coming right towards my face. I grabbed her wrist and said, “Please STOP.”

I know it’s popular and most common to blame the man. I was married for twenty-six years, and right up until the time I grabbed her wrist, I’ve never laid a hand on or hurt a woman. Unless you want to talk about the time when I was six, and my 5-year-old sister clipped me with a brick, and I pushed her in the mud?

At the time, I was 6'3,” 250 lbs and I was at the gym twice a week. So, I was in good shape.

She Said

I said, “Why did you do that?” She said, “Because you’re bigger than me (she was about 5'4" and maybe 120 lbs.), and I think you’re wrong.“ I asked, “Did you hit your ex-husband like this?” She said, “Of course. He had it coming to him.”

Without saying another word, I went to the walk-in closet we shared to get my coat. I had stopped talking to her. I was putting on my coat when another blow came to my ribs. She said, “You can’t leave.” I said, “I’ll get all my things tomorrow. I’ll have my sons come help me.” I headed for the door, and I took a blow to the back before I could get out.

Embarrassed

I played football for nine years. I’m a big guy. I want to think that I’m a gentle guy. I had just resigned from the ministry less than two years earlier. I could go on, but it’s not the point.

Bottom Line

As a CEO for more than 25 years (at that time), I was very familiar with the bottom line. She had crossed mine. NO HITTING, not even in jest. No hitting. I was done. I moved out the next day, and I never saw her again.

My Opinion

I’ve been married more than fifty-five of my seventy-seven years—twenty-six to my first wife. My wife Margaret and I have been married twenty-nine years, and we’re working hard on thirty years. We’ll make that and so many more. We love and RESPECT one another. We communicate nicely and politely.

No Hitting

To learn more about me, go to www.DRRawson.com. And now:

Here’s Libby’s challenge for her relationship column:

Thanks for reading,

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©DR Rawson

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