Poetry

Atonement

Rewriting the narrative

Trying to get past deserving to be punished

Lessons learned so fast, through the trauma I must rummage

Living with wings cast means I’m destined just to plummet

Always coming last, never make it to the summit

Done it all in every way Nothing new no games to play under sun and through the day Cumbersome, what does this weigh?

It’s heavy this chip that is on my shoulder

So very I trip Goddamn it’s a boulder!

But beauty they say is in eye of beholder

And truth is the way Getting hotter not colder

Leading me down to the heat in my gut to the burning sensation pouring salt on the cut Can’t look away even with my eyes shut Now you can see why they call me a nut

But that’s what I was I am on a new path

All of the negatives add up like math

Double the sedatives lessen the wrath

Rewrite the narratives Soak in the bath

Wash off the all the dirt that’s been caked on for years off all of the crevices and behind ears Realize I’m not alone that I have peers People that help me through all of my fears

Support will appear if you don’t block it out if you open yourself perhaps open your mouth Asking for help is hard not like we tout when we feel weak and bleak and can’t but pout

Some people can’t handle they say we’re too much Keep at distance while we just need touch and needing they think that it is but a crutch bleeding and they don’t care “so what” and such

But the right ones will come and they will stay There won’t be a thing that will keep them away They’ll carry you through through the night and the day and whisper the words that you wish you could say

Like you don’t deserve this and did not deserve that Cleaning the mess up and scooping the scat Gotta get back up get back up and bat swing for the fences ignoring the spat

that you had with yourself in your head all alone Fighting with no one to just feel at home But that was the old stuff and now we’ve been shown to live differently and for mistakes atone

Instagram | Twitter | LinkTree

Thank you for reading and/or listening.

As always a special thank you to all the editors at Know Thyself Heal Thyself, especially Diana C. for the publishing space.

Already a member on Medium and interested in writing for KTHT? Click here!

If you’d like to read any more of my work, I have categorized my writing here by Theme & Publication: