Writing While Black

Responding To Attacks: The Struggle Continues

Please read, then respond

I’ve gotten backlash from two men — about my article, Two Young Black Women Are Brutally Attacked By Four Men — Where Are My White Fems & Friends? Part I. I would love to hear from them, I haven’t thus far — which was the premise of my argument.

Perhaps, I expect too much, but I expected people to actually read my piece and give a thoughtful response or initiate respectful dialogue. I most certainly do not expect men to tell me I’m wrong for writing about my experiences or feelings. I welcome all opinions, but not accusatory rants. Again, I refuse to be told what to say or how to say it because you don’t respect, understand or like my opinion.

As I wrote in my first article:

NO man has the right to tell me or any other woman what or how to speak and if I chose to do it from a “high horse” you should simply make your concerns known in a respectful manner and tone and be mindful not to do the bidding of OUR oppressors. Perhaps you’re unaware that your response was hurtful. But when MEN of any race scold or reprimand Black Women it’s called “handling” us and it is a historical and racist practice to “put us back in our place” as if we are not human.

Secondly, please read the entire piece and:

In the future, I ask that you to take a beat before you react and only speak about what you know or seek the truth and facts. You don’t know me, so please don’t assume anything — try appreciative inquiry. In the words of Justice Sotomayor, “Just Ask, Be Brave…” It’s easy to accuse and attack, it takes wisdom and discipline to listen and learn.

I fight for a safe, equitable and inclusive world for my child and every marginalized person — including you because: “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly.” Martin Luther King, Jr.

This latest responder said:

“…Not everyone thinks it does a damn bit of good to parade their outrage in the streets, and it seems like you care more about that than the girls that were assaulted. Stop BEING your skin color. Just stop it.”

I agree! Everyone has a right to protest how they see fit — that’s why Medium and social media sites are important. They give provide options and access for people who can’t physically protest or simply don’t want to.

I urge you to read my pieces in their entirety before you respond again. I wrote about those ladies because, I do care and I wanted EVERYONE to care, too. I’m not sure what happened behind the scenes. Perhaps you were one of the people who sent a strongly worded letter to the AG’s office or made a phone call and if so, thank you. However, the Black community came out to support the victims and shut the station down.

I may be long-winded, but you’ll find that I’m fair. Once again, I write about intersectionality and my “skin color” is part of who I am. I understand that race and ethnic identity is nonbinary, it’s not a choice nor did I create this dynamic — colonialism and racism did. Telling me to “stop being [my] skin color is impossible and would require you to erase 400 years of slavery, bias institutionalized and internalized racism and ethnic, color and economic-based class systems across the African diaspora.

I had no concept of race or Blackness until I was called the N-word by an angry group of white people protesting when I desegregated my elementary school. That was my introduction to being in “my skin color”. It was scary and I didn’t ask for, nor deserved that experience, but it happened and my family taught me to forgive and to keep moving forward.

This is how I protest, but I know that dialogue is needed to make change…

I don’t mind you asking questions, but please don’t tell me what to say.

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