Are You The Main Character In Your Own Story?
How to not be an NPC in your own life
In video games, the virtual world is filled with NPCs (Non-Player Characters).
These computer-generated characters populate the land. Sometimes offering advice, sometimes attacking, sometimes just taking up space.
But one thing all NPCs lack is free will.
They are simply background fluff, supporting cast to the character with real agency, the human-controlled main character.
Yet sometimes we can feel like NPCs in the real world.
Are you constantly supporting the ups and downs of those around you but never the other way around?
Celebrating your sibling's promotion, supporting your friend through their recent break-up or mishap…
Are you constantly making decisions based on other people?
Passing on your dream school to attend a school closer to family, choosing a job you aren’t passionate about because your family thinks it’s respectable or secure…
Sometimes it feels like we are the supporting cast in our own life story.
The good news is it’s never too late to take back your life.
We only get one shot at this incredible gift of life. We can’t waste it living someone else’s story.
Like everything, there are pros and cons to being the main character.
For some people, the cons seems daunting:
Cons:
- Pressure: Being the main character can come with a great deal of pressure to live up to certain expectations or roles.
- Isolation: Main characters may feel isolated or lonely at times, as they bear the weight of their struggles alone.
- Self-Doubt: Main characters may struggle with self-doubt and uncertainty, questioning whether they are worthy of the spotlight or even capable of achieving their goals. They are often vulnerable to criticism and judgment from others, as their actions and decisions are scrutinized by those around them.
- Sacrifice: Being the main character often requires making sacrifices and tough decisions… like saying “no.”
- Character Development: Main characters may face challenges in their character development, as they struggle to overcome their flaws and grow as individuals.
I’m sure this list hits home for a lot of us. Especially if you aren’t someone comfortable with the limelight.
Jerry Seinfeld used to hang photos from the Hubble Space Telescope in the Seinfeld writers’ room. Staring at the vast expanse of the universe removed some of the anxiety he had over being the main character in his life (and on the show 😉).
It can be daunting to be the main character.
If you fail at your goal it can make you feel like a failure.
If you embarrass yourself, it can feel like the whole world takes note.
If you make a wrong turn or decision, it can feel like you have only yourself to blame.
But the alternative is far worse.
It is better to try and fail than to never even make the attempt. And oftentimes failure can even be good for us, as long as we learn from our mistakes.
After all, you may fail at your goal, but there is one way to guarantee 100% failure… Never try.
You may choose a school or job that isn’t in line with what your family wants. But guess what? They already have their life. They don’t need another one.
Your life is not a bonus life for anyone else. Regardless if it’s a friend, a mentor, or a family member.
While they might be nudging you in a direction they think would help you, ultimately it is not their life to experiment with.
You ultimately know what’s best for you.
Your life is your life, and you should guard it more fiercely than your favorite possession.
After all, possessions can be replaced. But your time, your one life, cannot be replaced.
You only have one shot.
So what if it doesn’t end up perfectly? Who cares if you mess up? That is how you grow, become more resilient and self-aware.
Take control of your own destiny.
Build your life story around your own values and aspirations.
Become the main character of your own story.
Startup Lab
Want to stay up to date on Startup Lab articles? Please consider Subscribing for updates here Following us here Or using our referral link to sign up for Medium here