PSYCHOLOGY|MENTAL HEALTH

An Open Letter To Everyone Who Gets The Winter Blues

I used to hate winters and felt they hated me too, but then something happened

September and October tend to be beautiful months in the northeastern part of the United States and in many parts of the northern hemisphere.

I have oftentimes missed autumn in Philadelphia when I have lived in other parts of the world like I do now (my current home is in northern Germany).

The weather is usually a comfortable temperature and the leaves of trees start turning all sorts of spectacular colors.

Life seems to return to some degree of normalcy (with the exception of COVID-19) in September with students of all ages returning to school and people back from whatever vacations they took.

I’ve always looked forward to the return of a predictable rush hour pattern and knowing which days, areas, and times I was less likely to encounter crowds of people.

For example, on Sundays and bank holidays, I never went to this huge park by my home in Philly that I enjoyed walking and biking through, especially when the weather was nice. It would be hell to find parking, and the peace and quiet I sought there were seldom found on such days.

September and October are optimal times to prepare yourself for the onslaught of what is “the holiday season”, particularly in America.

Starting with Halloween on October 31st and lasting through New Year’s Day on January 1st, the holiday season, especially in the United States, is a force to be reckoned.

Thanksgiving is always the 3rd Thursday in November, usually somewhere between November 21st and November 30th. Christmas is the 25th of December and New Years is just 1 week later.

I don’t know much about Yom Kippur nor Kwanzaa, but those holidays are around Christmas as well.

That is a lot of major holidays in just 8 weeks!

Routines are disrupted. Arrangements must be made. The days get shorter and shorter and many people become anxious, overwhelmed, and depressed.

Even if you don’t celebrate ANY of these holidays, you are sure to be affected by them if you live in America, or know anyone who does.

Oh, and football (basketball and hockey) season makes an impact as well.

Why?

Because supermarkets oftentimes become more crowded before a games start (usually on Saturday or Sunday, sometimes on Monday also), which means there are more drivers on the road and cars in parking lots.

I used to follow game days and times when I lived in Philly and worked in the suburbs so I could try to avoid traffic, especially after the games when more drunk (sometimes pissed off) drivers were on the road.

The holiday season also means more out-of-state drivers driving around not knowing where they’re going, or not used to the flow of traffic in the area.

People are oftentimes returning home or going somewhere to spend time with someone during the third week of November.

I would remind myself of this and allow myself more time to get places. I also tried to have more patience so I didn’t give someone the finger, which was not always easy!

Let’s not forget “Black Friday” either, which in recent years has started ON Thanksgiving Day (it is technically the day after Thanksgiving), which is shopping madness at its finest.

I try to stay home that day, or only go to places I need to go. Many people have off of work and it can feel like pure chaos on the street, and in stores.

Shall I mention the inescapable holiday music blaring from outdoor and indoor speakers, at countless businesses?

When I was working as a massage therapist at an upscale spa near Philly, I had a talk with the manager who wanted to play instrumental Christmas music for us all, clients and therapists, because she thought it would be nice.

I quickly convinced her that for many, it is not “nice” to come into a place where people go to escape their reality for an hour or two and relax.

I actually like a lot of Christmas songs and enjoy singing along to them, however, it can be a very stressful time of year that can sometimes feel more like an endurance sport than a festive celebration.

You don’t have to get overwhelmed during the holidays, though it’s perfectly understandable to become so.

I think that the level of consumerism in America and the degree to which a sense of community or family is downplayed can make the entire holiday season feel pretty intense.

September and October can be a wonderful time of year to savor life and settle into the changes that are happening now and in the near future.

Try new things and find comfort in the old things that soother. Embrace the changes and go with the inevitable tide that is to come.

It can truly be a magical time of year, especially if you’re open to that possibility.

I dare, encourage, and support you.

With love,

KL Simmons

There are some tried and true strategies I have tested that can help you feel the real joy, connection and peace that are commonly espoused when it comes to the holiday season in America and abroad.

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