America’s Got Talent: The Champions Finals review and final rankings

Shin Lim, Susan Boyle, and Darci Lynne headline a star-studded AGT finale as 12 acts duke it out for the ultimate prize.

Well everyone, we made it. It’s the America’s Got Talent: The Champions Finals, and it’s going to be awesome. AGT brought back 50 of the best acts from over a decade of the show around the world, and we’re down to a final 10. We’ve got magician Shin Lim, British viral sensation Susan Boyle, child ventriloquist Darci Lynne, opera singer Paul Potts, comedian Preacher Lawson, and more. It’s an absolutely star-studded finale, even with way too many singers in the mix.

This is the moment we’ve waited for all these weeks. These are the best acts in the world and it’s going to be a great show, maybe even great enough to curb some of my usual cynicism (narrator: it wasn’t). Let’s review every act, rank them all, and pick a winner. Spoilers abound, so be sure to watch first. Leave your rankings and winner pick in the comments at the bottom!

Introduction of Judges and Rules

Things are a bit different tonight. We have 12 acts instead of 10, thanks to a “big surprise” Terry promises us, one we’ve already known for weeks on social media and one the show itself just spoiled a few minutes ago in the intro. AGT chose two wildcard acts to join the other 10 competitors in the finals: ventriloquist Darci Lynne and magician Jon Dorenbos. They’re predictable but strong choices. I’d have chosen Dorenbos and teen rock star Courtney Hadwin, but I’m not exactly going to stand in the way of a non-singer.

The wildcard thing is all a bit hokey anyway. This entire show was pre-taped in September and October, including the finals. AGT introduced its surprise wildcard twist and its Twitter vote hashtags, but it was all a giant charade. They’ve still never explained who the mythical superfan voters are either, but apparently “they” will pick the winner. The whole setup is a bit disingenuous. This is Simon’s show, and it’s mostly just a winter TV slot and a chance for Simon to show off his favorite acts and re-up some publicity.

Tonight will be just the 12 acts. We’ll have to tune in next Monday for a two-hour result show featuring 117 minutes of advertising and three minutes of actual results. Heading into the performances, my prediction for the final three is Shin Lim, Darci Lynne, and Brian Justin Crum, and I’ll stick with Shin as my winner.

Alright, that was almost as much preamble as AGT. Let’s get to the acts.

The 12 Finalists

Cristina Ramos

Cristina is a surprising opener but her act is a good energizer. She starts in a ridiculous cocoon inches in front of the judges with some opera hooey before a quick change of costume and genre, much like last time. Ramos rocks Blondie but gets a bit self-indulgent toward the end with a lot of yelling at various albeit talented pitches. She should stand out amongst the other singers, but that was a rock show, not AGT.

Preacher Lawson

Preacher’s intro video is hilarious as he discovers the return of Darci Lynne, the act that beat him in the finals. Lawson is delightful and uproarious as always, with plenty of punchlines and entertaining voices. This is what a modern-day Eddie Murphy looks like, with a bit of Jim Carrey wide eyes and body humor thrown in. He ends on a high note, ripping off his shirt to show up Terry with a pec flex while also crushing a “That joke just cost me $6.95” line that got my biggest laugh. Preacher Lawson is just a funny, funny dude. I need him on TV, and I need his Netflix special, like, yesterday. Churches would be a lot more full if every Preacher were this funny.

Darci Lynne

I suddenly realize during Darci’s intro video that she has a real shot to win this thing. What does a child ventriloquist save for a performance with everything on the line? It turns out the answer to that is opera, and holy cow did she bring it. That girl just sang pitch-perfect opera on national TV without moving her lips. Paul Potts shouldn’t even come out. I write in my notes that if Darci hits a final note, it’s all over, and there’s that final note. Darci Lynne is back. She’s a sure-thing top three after that, and we might have a wildcard winner.

Deadly Games

We have Heidi to blame for putting this danger act into the finals, and they’re not at their finest tonight. Alfredo misses two early throws, and as he lines up an arrow at Anna’s head, I am actually scared. I honestly thought they might stop the act. Instead, Alfredo shoots an arrow at her head twice, and Deadly Games wins the finals by still being alive post-act. AGT gives them an extended judges trick and a commercial break, which instinctively strikes me as unfair even though this whole thing happened four months ago. Whatever.

Kechi

Kechi’s in the finals because of her story, not her voice, and I get sad as I realize we have only eight acts remaining this season and Kechi, Susan, and Paul are three of them. Sigh. Kechi has a lovely voice, but this is an unexciting performance, and Simon admits as much, using the word “inspiration” to describe her. Once more for the people in the back: this is not America’s Got Inspiration! Kechi is Simon’s golden buzzer, and this was not a winning performance, so if she ends up near the top, this is super rigged.

Brian Justin Crum

BJC is the one singer I’m excited to see tonight, and he really brings it. I don’t love the song choice from The Greatest Showman, but Brian wanted to have his Broadway moment, and boy did he have it. He had that holy crap key change, and he hit every note. Brian Justin Crum has the best voice of anyone in the finals, I’m sure of it. He blew Kechi and Cristina out of the water and I think he has a shot, though by the look on Brian’s face, this was already a winning night for him.

Jon Dorenbos

I’m torn. I am always happy to see Jon Dorenbos but also torn because I’m worried he’ll split the magician vote with Shin Lim. As Dorenbos is coming out, it strikes me that he could win this thing. AGT loves magic, and if he outshines Shin with a big moment, he could make everyone else disappear. The act is classic Dorenbos with a slow build chalkboard trick we’ve seen before but a whopper of a payoff that brings his AGT journey full circle. Jon is such a good storyteller, and that really elevates his performances, and he kicks the extra point by revealing to the crowd that he and his wife are newly pregnant, too. Best wildcard pick since the Philadelphia Eagles.

Angelica Hale

Ah, I forgot we still had Angelica too. She sings “Impossible,” the answer to the age-old question of “Can AGT turn down a cute kid singing?” and she’s fine but I like her personality more than her performance. The song is overproduced with backup singers that overshadow Angelica’s voice. The best parts are the Mariah Carey-esque ooOOoohs. I’m just going to pretend that was Tape Face. Yay! Good job, Tape Face.

Kseniya Simonova

Sand art strikes me as a tough act for a talent show finals — how do you hit that memorable, finals-high moment? — but holy cow was I wrong. Simonova is absolutely mesmerizing. She manages to give us an entire movie of a story in three or four minutes of sand art and left me grabbing for Kleenex at the end. That is an incredible storytelling ability to do that much that fast with that level of detail and nothing but sand and music. Stunning. Kseniya surely made Ukraine proud with that performance, bringing her story to life before our eyes, a real WOW moment. I’m not convinced sand art can win, but I am rooting for her.

Paul Potts

Potts is outstanding, but I’m bored anyway. Why does it feel like all opera singers pick one of like four song choices? My TV is so bored it even mercifully cuts out the audio for a few seconds. Poor Paul got beat at his own game tonight by a 14-year-old who didn’t move her mouth. But I’m sure all will be well when he returns home to his wife, who I can only assume is the talking teapot from Beauty and the Beast. Tell Chip hey.

Shin Lim

I’m bummed Shin doesn’t get the hammer to end tonight’s show, but I quickly forget my disappointment because SHIN THA GOD IS BACK. How can Shin do so much with so little, just a deck of cards and some tense music?! It’s all a bit familiar but still unbelievably mesmerizing, and the cup trick moment at the end makes me scream in delighted shock. Shin immediately gets the rewind-and-rewatch treatment. What a performer. That’s my champion, right there.

Susan Boyle

I suppose it makes sense Susan goes last, since she’s probably the most viral Got Talent star. Boyle sings “I Dreamed a Dream” again, which feels appropriate because we’ve all seen this before. Everyone literally watched her sing this song on YouTube a decade ago. I find myself scrolling through my phone, a disappointing end to a mostly electric finale. If it turns out this whole thing was a vehicle for Susan Boyle to win, it’ll be so disappointing.

My personal rankings

Champions? More like chumpions.

12. Angelica Hale 11. Susan Boyle 10. Cristina Ramos 9. Kechi 8. Paul Potts

I was going to update the subhead to reflect the fact that these folks are all finalists, but you know what? No. We could’ve had a perfectly wonderful finale without any of those acts. Go ahead, pick your favorite and get rid of the other four. Did finale night change? It’s the next morning — do you even remember what any of them sang? Trade out three of those acts for Samuel J. Comroe, Courtney Hadwin, and Brian King Joseph and tell me this night isn’t exponentially better. Come on, this isn’t that hard.

Worthy of consideration

7. Deadly Games 6. Brian Justin Crum

These were finale-worthy acts but didn’t feel like winners. No shame in that with the strength of the acts we had at the top.

My top five

5. Jon Dorenbos 4. Preacher Lawson 3. Kseniya Simonova 2. Darci Lynne 1. Shin Lim

I’m going with a top five instead of a top three tonight, mostly because that’s how I assume they’ll do the results show. But it’s really a top three in the end. I really like Dorenbos and Preacher, but there’s no question which three acts I’ll remember most from the night.

Simonova was so good, and that was probably the act I’ll remember most, but it feels like Shin or Darci will win this thing — though I would be genuinely excited for anyone in this top five to be crowned champion. I’d love to see any of them perform, but if I only get to buy one ticket, Shin Lim is getting my money. He was my winner pick going in, and I’m sticking with him.

My Predictions

Normally this is where we discuss results, but we won’t get the results until next Monday even though, again, this whole thing happened four months ago. Did NBC really manage to keep 12 acts, four judges, and tens of thousands of fans silent this entire time without the winner news getting out? I’m not even mad. That’s amazing.

In lieu of results, let’s make some predictions. The rankings above are my own, but you can bet your sweet bippy AGT isn’t putting its six singer finalists in the bottom seven. I was bored by Paul Potts, but I feel like there’s a very good chance he’s among the final choices. I suspect Susan Boyle will be in a final five too, just because she’s Susan Boyle.

If I had to bet my life on one performer making the final five, Darci Lynne is the one I’m most certain of — though the superfans didn’t vote for her last time. I also expect Shin Lim to be among the final contestants out there. So that’s four. The fifth spot should go to Simonova based on tonight, and my heart wants to see Preacher, but I’ll go with my gut and pick Jon Dorenbos to round out the final five.

So that’s Paul Potts, Susan Boyle, Darci Lynne, Shin Lim, and Jon Dorenbos as my predicted final five in no particular order, and I’m going with Darci Lynne as my predicted winner pick.

The results show is two hours of fluff with one final reveal, so this will be my last AGT recap, at least until the summer. But first, some news! AGT announced that Mel B and Heidi will be replaced on the judges panel by Gabrielle Union and Julianne Hough. Union is absolutely stunning, and I have no idea who Hough is, but she can’t bring much less to the table than Heidi Klum. We’re also getting Terry Crews as the permanent new host, and I’m always happy to have more Crews in my life.

After all, no matter what the final results are, remember who the real AGT winner is: it’s all of us for avoiding Tyra Banks for an entire season and apparently forever going forward. #blessed

Enjoy the golden confetti, y’all.

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