Aging — Positive & Negative Change
A couple, one fearless, the other afraid. Aging changes one positively and the other negatively.
Change is a necessary part of life. It also comes with a reason. Many humans aren’t aware of the changes on their bodies, in their lives, in their actions, choices, and decisions.
Life and death forces change on the living. Humans influence change in us in good and bad ways. Laws demand change. Fate, destiny, weather, wealth, poverty, parenthood, friendship, relationships, everything demands some sort of change from us.
Most changes we can’t control.
Many we can.
As we age, we find ourselves at a crossroads, as life forces us to make certain decisions that will affect our lives into aging.
One thing is for sure, the elderly don’t want to be alone. They will need the help of others. For some, they would rather have their children or a family member.
Sometimes a stranger is better.
The life changes that aging demands are painful and difficult for many, but have reasons.
Studying a couple who have been married for thirty-five years. Been together for thirty-nine.
Carol is easy-going, kind, and soft-spoken all of her life. She allows everyone to walk all over her and take advantage of her generosity. She keeps silent about everything that was done to her, good and bad. She never complains about how cruel her family, friends, and others were. She doesn’t fight or stand up for herself and her rights. She is shy and stays away from most people. Carol is considered an easy walkover. She is liked by everyone and isn’t seen as a threat to anyone.
Frank, her husband, is the opposite. No one walks over him. In fact, most people fear him. He is honest without meaning to be. He acts on impulses and tells everyone the truth. He has more enemies than friends and everyone is careful how they deal with him. They think twice before they approach him.
Both are kind people. No one uses Frank or takes advantage of him.
Frank is in his early sixties. Carol is in her late fifties.
Change demands a say.
Who do you think is aware of the change and is in control?
Some would say that Carol has picked up her husband’s personality and he picked up hers. They switched personalities.
Carol has been transformed into someone who will not allow anyone to take her for a fool. She has become outspoken and isn’t afraid to defend herself when she feels as if she has been taken advantage of. Carol stands up to Frank and tells him how she feels about everything he does. She became fearless and demanded a better life, and more respect while taking control of her life. Being assertive, while refusing to take crap from anyone, is what Carol is now.
Frank is getting soft, refusing to stand up for himself. He says, “I must choose my battles carefully.”
“So, you have become wiser,” Carol said when he didn’t stand up against the dishonesty one of his friends did to her. Which he wouldn’t have allowed years ago.
“What do you want me to do?” he defends.
“The right thing,” she suggested.
“For whom?”
“All parties involved.”
“I am not young anymore. I can’t fight everything,” he explained.
“True,” Carol agreed. “You just said you must choose your battles carefully. This isn’t worth fighting for?”
“Sorry but I am too old for many things,” he defends.
“So, you are afraid,” Carol said in realization. “All of your life you defend yourself without fear and whatever you think is right for you and other nonsense.”
“I was young, silly and can handle anything.”
“Now you are old and can’t handle anything?” Carol asked.
“Aging is my disability,” he said.
“So is fear,” Carol adds.
The realization caused the blood to rush to his face as he looked as if he was going to pass out.
“You have become afraid, Frank,” Carol alerts him of change he wasn’t aware of.
“And you have become a warrior,” he said, eyeing her in fear and suspicion.
“I must Frank. I have put up with a lot from humanity and life. I can’t anymore. I have no place to put the pain and it must come out,” Carol shared.
“And I am keeping mine inside,” Frank said in regret. “I hate change.”
“I can’t,” Carol said. “I change for better.”
“And I didn’t,” more regret poured from Frank.
“You can change back,” Carol suggests.
“I am too old,” his fear spoke.
A couple, one fearless, the other afraid. Aging changes one positively and the other negatively.
Carol changed to protect and stand up for herself and others. Frank allowed fear to disable his life.
This is one of the major reasons for divorce in long-term marriages. One person gives up. The other decides to fight life. Aging does come with many difficult changes and decisions. As we age, we should become wiser and don’t allow fear to intimidate us. Fear destroy us from deep within our body, mind and soul. It’s prevents healthy and happy living. Aging isn’t a disability, but with fear, it will be.
Change is good, do it positively.
Do it wisely!
Do it for personal improvement!
Do it right!
Do it fearlessly!
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09YBM8R47?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860
Thank you for reading this piece. I hope you enjoy it and will savor more from some talented writers on this platform, whose links are below.
Taste more from Cedric Johnson, PhD
Savor more from Aliya🦋
Feast on more from Hifreequencyvibez
Savor more from James Boylan