About Me — Edward John
I’m not who you think I am. But I’m probably not who I think I am either.
I use a pen name here, for the same reason Zulie Rane does — I want the freedom to write about personal things without friends and family reading it. But I go a step further than Zulie — that’s not even a photo of me. I’m older than the man in that stock photo probably is, but I look younger. I’m 43 but I look about 23.
Some quick facts about me:
- I meditate every day using the NSR method — it’s basically a cheaper version of Transcendental Meditation.
- For over 2 years I led an outdoor mindfulness group as an experiment, even though I wasn’t sure what I was doing.
- I don’t believe in free will.
- I once dated someone with Paranoid Schizophrenia.
- I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome in 2012.
- I don’t like social media and smartphones.
- On a first date, she leaned over and spat on the floor.
- In my 20s, I made 8 CDs of electronic music in 3 years.
- I once had some of my photos included in a magazine.
- I enjoy using predictive text to write silly stories.
- I once witnessed an old lady’s car go up at a 45-degree angle after she crashed into a parked car because she’d sneezed.
- Some of my happiest times were when I was unemployed.
- I was there the day before it happened. What am I referring to? Ask me if you’re curious.
- Joining an improv group turned me into a better version of myself.
I like trying to understand what the rules are and then seeing if I can do something different. After reading several About Me’s of other people, I noticed that none of them ended with a limerick. So, why don’t I end with a limerick? I mean, who’s going to stop me? I saw nothing in the publication rules about not including limericks, so if this doesn’t get accepted, I shall write a strongly worded letter of complaint (in my private journal).
Anyway, here’s the limerick:
There once was a man not called Ed Who kept his bike in the shed. The shed often leaked, The bike sometimes squeaked, So he’d often go walking instead.
Or how about a haiku?
My About Me page. Why not have some fun with it? We only live once.