7 “Weird” Things That Make You More Attractive to Women

Young men are quick to preach that being an attractive man is all about looks, money, and confidence.

Believe what you believe. But what if one day you realise that YOU have become a good-looking guy with some money and confidence? You’re going to freak out if you’re not attracting anyone!

Sooner or later you learn that attraction is more complex than looks, money, and confidence.

The guys that preach about those things are either clueless or are telling themselves a comforting lie, as it’s easier than asking themselves why some men doing worse than them are still attracting more women than them.

‘29-year-old guys with a secure job and $100k salary will say “Women won’t date me because I’ve never had a girlfriend.” While jobless and broke dudes hooked on meth have three girlfriends at once. Bro, you can get a girlfriend. Just learn what women want.’— Adam Lane Smith, Attachment Specialist

When you start caring less about attracting women to focus on yourself, your dating life can change for the better in a matter of months. And along the way, you realise some things sparked attraction.

You don’t understand why they made you more attractive at first. But after learning more about attraction, it’s not weird at all. It makes perfect sense.

1. Sharing an insecurity, fear, or weakness

I’ve accidentally blurted out an insecurity on a date many times thanks to my #1 poison: alcohol. My heart sank and I immediately regretted it but I shouldn’t have. She liked it.

“Understand: you are one of a kind. Your character traits are a kind of chemical mix that will never be repeated in history. There are ideas unique to you, a specific rhythm and perspective that are your strengths, not your weaknesses. You must not be afraid of your uniqueness and you must care less and less what people think of you.” — Robert Greene, Author

Think about this: the girl you’re talking to has probably had many dates in her life where the guy is trying to come across as flawless. Great… but nobody is perfect and we all know it.

You come off as a try-hard, maybe even a little untrustworthy or creepy if you don’t have any flaws or insecurities.

Sharing an embarrassing story, like the time you puked during a job interview or telling her about your phobia of boats — things like this can do wonders. It shows a bit of vulnerability and that you’re not trying too hard to impress her. It’s refreshing.

It also takes some pressure off her shoulders. Because she has insecurities, fears, and weaknesses too.

(There’s a limit to this: don’t overdo it.)

2. Talking less and never interrupt

I remember hearing the singer of Slipknot, Corey Taylor, talking about one of his band members, Craig Jones; known for being the most mysterious member as he never says anything.

Corey was asked about this and he said that Craig talks, just not very often. But when he does talk, people hang onto his every word. Obviously this guy sounds like an extreme case and I don’t recommend that you stop talking but there’s something to learn here.

Your words hold more weight when you’re not rushing to fill every quiet gap with the sound of your voice. If you pay attention to the conversations around you, people interrupt each other all the time.

Stamp this behaviour out and your conversations with women will be so much better.

“Looking back, you realize that everything would have explained itself if you had only stopped interrupting.” — Robert Breault, Operatic Tenor

So why is this in a “weird” list? Because it’s weird that it even needs to be said.

Too many men tell women their entire life story on the first date and interrupt them every few sentences along the way.

Just take a breath and listen.

3. Sharing a surprising passion, hobby, or interest of yours

Some men hide their passions from the world as a lot of male friendships consist of “banter” (borderline bullying). So men tend to keep their passions to themselves unless it’s playing football, boxing, or something else “manly”. (We’re a strange bunch.)

Men fear getting mocked for being strange but this is where it’s at. When a woman thinks that she’s got you figured out but then learns you’re into something that she’d never have guessed, it makes her more interested in you.

And if she was already a little attracted, now she’s even MORE attracted as there’s another layer to you that she didn’t know about.

“Be the flame, not the moth.”― Giacomo Casanova, Adventurer & Author

I worked at an entertainment store once and I put on a mixed martial arts DVD to watch on my lunch break. This girl walked in that I’d been flirting with for weeks and she moaned, “Who put this on? I don’t want to watch this!”.

She was amazed when she found out that I put it on, even more so when I told her that I was obsessed with combat sports.

I was a nerdy, shy, feminine, indie guy back then — and she was shocked to learn that I loved the most violent combat sport there is. You should have seen her face when I told her that I put it on. She seemed to like me even more after that.

Like sharing an insecurity, people fear doing this as they don’t want to be seen as weird. But the biggest complaint I hear from women on the dating scene is that they struggle to find a connection with men.

And how are they going to find it if you don’t let them in on your passions, hobbies, and interests?

4. Absence

“How can I miss you if you won’t go away?” — Dan Hicks, Singer

If diamonds started growing from every tree today they’d lose value overnight. A similar thing happens to you when you’re around too much. You lose some shine in others’ eyes as you become part of the furniture.

You’re a little more mundane to those who don’t know you and the ones that do know you may start taking you for granted a little because you’re always around.

Should you go missing for a few days/weeks, they clock that they haven’t seen you in a while and they start wondering about you.

Once I went on holiday alone and I swear every day my phone lit up with girls that I hadn’t spoken to in a while. Female friends, girls on social media — once they saw me on holiday, they started getting in contact with me again.

You become more attractive when there’s some mystery about you. And if someone is already crushing on you, missing you will boost that attraction up a notch or two.

5. Keeping your biggest wins to yourself, unless asked

Imagine if some guy you met told you within minutes of meeting him that he’s an amazing singer and it’s just a matter of time before he’s famous. You’d be like, okay dude… kinda weird that you said that right away. And you wouldn’t believe he was that good.

Now imagine instead, people keep coming up to you and say, “Oh that guy you were just talking to, he’s an AMAZING singer! I swear he’s going to be famous soon. He’s SO good! It was one of the best gigs I’ve ever been to.”

You’d be thinking, damn! He must be good. What a cool guy. I spoke to him for ages and he didn’t mention that he sang.

If you tried to impress a woman by telling her about the most impressive things about you, it comes off as needy.

But if a girl learns from someone else that you’re a successful musician and are about to tour America, or something like that, it’s attractive that she got to learn this about you. You didn’t lead with it.

“Humility is the secret of success. The humble person is more liked, more trusted, and more successful in all aspects of life.” — John C. Maxwell, Author

6. Sharing wild experiences and stories

Once I went out for drinks after work with some colleagues I didn’t know too well. I didn’t like one of the guys I was with at all. He was trying too hard to be funny and it was exhausting.

The conversation was dry, then out of nowhere one of the girls shared a gross story. So I chimed in with some gross stories of my own as I used to work on cruise ships and saw some wild things. I shared story after story and everyone was laughing apart from the guy that was doing my head in.

Mr buzzkill was looking at me like I was crazy; he couldn’t believe I was sharing these gross stories with people I hardly knew. After that night, one of the girls who pretty much ignored me before then tried making a move on me a few times.

I write this in many stories of mine but people want to have a good time. They want to laugh. How shocking…

“Stories are the creative conversion of life itself into a more powerful, clearer, more meaningful experience. They are the currency of human contact.” — Robert McKee, Author

The crazier and weirder your stories are, the better. (Just test the water first. Make sure your audience can handle it.)

7. Not being too available

Check out this CRAZY story from a guy that left a comment (edited) on one of my other Stories, A Simple Way to Attract Women That Most Guys Never Learn:

“This super hot girl started hanging out with my friends (guys and girls) one street racing weekend. She was too hot for me, I thought. So I never gave her much thought. One night we get busted by the police on our hang-out spot, and her girlfriends bailed out on her during the frenzy. She asked if she could go with me and I told her, no, as I’m going to race more later on and I can’t have extra person weight. So she went with another couple guys. Somehow she found this incredibly attractive and next day asked me on a date. I was mindblown. She is my wife now for 20 years.”

…Wild! (And I do NOT condone street racing by the way.)

Why did this work? I’m guessing this girl wasn’t used to hearing “No” very often.

He said no because — although it’s awfully reckless, dangerous, and ILLEGAL!— street racing was important to him and he wouldn’t let anyone distract him from his mission. Not even a “super hot girl” that he thought was too hot for him.

He must have stood out from the other guys that melted in her presence on a daily basis.

Should you use these tactics to make yourself more attractive to women? No. The attraction sparked by the things in this list is a byproduct of pursuing what excites you in life and showing more interest in others. How “weird”…

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