7 Things That You Shouldn’t Do In Your Twenties

If you want to feel good in your forties

Have you ever regretted something bad you did years ago?

Of course, right?

Come from a different country and not at a young age helped me to become aware faster of the differents customs or routines in this country. At the same time, it was harder to get into this culture.

The fact that I was never alone in my country. Always, a lot of friends and family around you. The feeling you still have someone close to you and can join you wherever you are. The fact that you rarely have the time to be alone. It was over here.

When I came to NY and started to look for a job, it was everything weird, no bad, no good, just odd. People only with phones, and going out alone, it was impressed. I remember I said, I will never do that and later I figurated out, How wrong I was.

Another thing that I was impressed by how people walk that fast on the streets. Everyone seems in a rush, and even the time passed faster. I couldn’t believe how time flew here. I was ready to prove that something is going on here that makes the time faster than other countries.

It wasn’t anything wrong with this city. It was me. These are the critical things that I shouldn’t have done in my twenty to live more comfortably in my forties.

1. Spend More Time With Myself

We have a big family in my country. I remember I used to meet people that I never saw before, and my parents introduced them as a cousin. It’s normal in our cultures we have a lot of cousins, aunts that we didn’t even know they exist.

Besides, friends always are ready to join you wherever you are. I always had someone to chill after the job. Sometimes, people used to say no, but the next one was always ready to go out. It was nice at some point. But that is why I never learn to be by myself. And the fact that being with yourself helps us to know you better and think better as a consequence decide better.

2. Learn To Say No With Confidence

It was hard. I remember I didn’t want to hurt feelings saying NO to a particular task that I wasn’t interested in. Just to make the other person feel better. How long times would I have gained saying NO if that activity isn’t in your priorities? You’re helping other people make his goals come true, not yours. If you can help someone, it’s fine. But if that moment interfere the moment that you are working in your stuff, you shouldn’t hesitate to say NO.

“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.”― Anna Taylor

3. Take More Risk

It is clear to us that we love to be comfortable. To think about what can I do to step out of my comfort zone, used to bother me. If my life is good, why should I change? But the truth is, there is always room to improve in life. And a unique way to do that is steeping out from your comfort zone. You will realize that life starts when you overcome the border of your comfort zone.

“What you have to do and the way you have to do it is incredibly simple. Whether you are willing to do it is another matter.” — Peter Drucker

4. Don’t Compare Yourself With Others

This is crucial, I used to do all the time. Let’s start with the fact that everyone has a different life, perceptions, and experience. Different people raised them, so it’s a waste of time to compare yourself with others. Now with social media available 24/7, we watch pictures about the life of others that we would love to have. The only result that you are going to have is to be hurt.

“Comparison paralyzes progress, both of the mind and the society.”― Abhijit Naskar

5. Don’t Be Afraid To Change Directions

I used to love programming, cooking, and the idea of doing something different wasn’t in my mind. My Fixed mindset was always on autopilot, thinking that I couldn’t do something new that wasn’t connected with my regular activities.

It took time to switch my fixed mindset to a growth mindset and realize that there is always something more that you can try. A lot of times, you get a big surprise how this can change the way you see the thing. In the worse case scenarios, you always learn something new. In the best-case scenario, you can find the activities that you will dedicate all your life.

6. Forgive Yourself

This applies to all ages. The point isn’t to live without any regret; the point is not hated ourselves for having them. Everyone makes mistakes, and we just should learn about them and committed to don’t do it again. At least, not the same error. It’s a part of life keep learning and doesn’t kick yourself thinking the thing that you did before. Just favor to yourself and stop. But always study the mistake to be aware of a similar situation in the future.

7. Don’t Spend Money On Thing You Don’t need

It happened when you buy things you don’t need like clothes that you never wear, and finally end up with a considerable debt in your credit card. I remember when I bought a new car, it was expensive and hurt a lot to pay it off. I realized that there were a lot of more affordable options. Everyone has to pass this experience to learn about it.

Now everything that I buy, I try to be aware and ask the questions. Will This bring me some sort of value in my life? Or how many times will I wear these clothes or shoes? Do I want to? or Do I need it?

Finally, It’s easy to pinpoint the things that go wrong; they often leave us feeling frustrated or disillusioned. Whether things go right or wrong, you always learn, and It’s still a good time to improve.

Thank you for reading!

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Godofredo Rojas is a writer, chef, and constant learner from Peru. He studied in Le Cordon Bleu in Lima, Peru. He moved to New York in March 2011. He’s on Facebook and Twiter.