5 Steps To Turn Your “Break Up” Into A “Wake Up” In Life

If someone leaves you and you find yourself, you’ve won.

In the Japanese art of Kintsugi, artists repair broken portraits using dust from gold or other precious metals.

The idea is that by embracing flaws and imperfections, you can create an even stronger and more beautiful work of art.

Each break is unique, and instead of repairing an object as new, the Kintsugi art technique emphasizes “scars” as part of the design.

Similarly, we can apply this lesson to our healing process. Sometimes, we create something unique, more beautiful, and more resistant while fixing broken things.

When you experience a break in your heart, you have the choice of whether you will forever view it as a wound or turn it into art.

You can use the lessons from your broken heart and teach others. You can turn your broken heart into a service to others. You can take your broken heart and create a business out of it.

The point is to take a tragedy and use it in a productive way that will positively impact the lives of others.

If you are experiencing heartbreak, here are five things you can do to grow through your grief.

Write down your emotions

There have been several times in my life when I have felt consumed by my emotions. So many thoughts, doubts, and fears were going through my head at once.

Instead of letting them run free in my head, jotting down how I felt gave me the opportunity to get out of myself to find peace.

Writing down your thoughts with pen and paper is a way to recognize past experiences that may hurt you and re-integrate them into your life so that they become a part of you.

Move into your body

Awakening your self-healing power helps you perform exercises effectively in a way that will not hurt you but will only improve your well-being.

Self-healing is basically an effort to heal inner wounds. Self-healing can be done in various ways, such as relaxation through breathing, contemplation with meditation, or yoga.

And create positive emotions that will impact the release of endorphins, also known as “happiness hormones,” which help us sleep better and feel more energy and vitality so that our current reality doesn’t seem so dark.

Shift your thoughts to thankfulness

When we are feeling heartbroken, it’s hard to think of anything but how we are hurting.

Instead of focusing on the relationship ending or the anxiety post-breakup, redirect your energy to appreciating what you have.

You can be thankful for something small. It could be you are grateful for having a certain friend, or maybe you appreciate your influence on others.

Make a gratitude list to shift your thoughts from the negative by focusing on three things you are grateful for. But don’t just list them. Give the details. Be as specific as possible.

Think of people and experiences that have brought real meaning and joy into your life. And day by day, you feel ready to make a new start.

Change your tone

Music improves certain parts of the brain, especially the amygdala and hippocampus, by calming the nervous system and stimulating powerful memories and strong emotions.

Listening to music also increases the production of dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin in the brain, which lowers cortisol levels and induces feelings of happiness.

We try to minimize our sadness with songs that amplify our pain when we feel pain. But the music that fits our melancholy mood only makes us sad and tired.

Instead, choose uplifting songs to lift your spirit. Get energized. Get inspired. Turn to songs that are empowering and make you feel alive.

Set your pain free

The hardest thing about a breakup is actually releasing the person. It’s difficult to release all the possibilities projected unto them.

Holding onto the good times is a completely normal part of grieving the end of a relationship. However, thinking only about the good times can make getting over the relationship harder.

When you think so much about the good times and possibilities of what might have been, your thoughts about the relationship can become skewed, sometimes allowing fantasy to overtake reality.

But here is the thing, those fantasies were never a reality. So it’s time to release them in favor of what can actually be.

When your hold on to your past, your present will pass you by. It’s time to let them go so your real future can arrive.

Parting words

Everyone goes through tough times, and living a life of perfection isn’t necessarily realistic.

Kintsugi reveals how to heal and shows you that you are better off with your golden cracks.

You won’t realize your full potential until you go through tough times. By embracing your imperfection, you celebrate your strengths.

This shift in mindset, from striving for an impossible ideal to accepting our strengths, leads to a more positive and strength-oriented mindset.

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