Life-Lessons

5 Frequent Reasons Why People Tend To Secretly Hate You

There is no such thing as “being hated for no particular reason.”

Don’t want to be hated?

Then just sit on the sidelines, do nothing, don’t reach your goals, be average, boring and no one will hate you! It’s that easy.

I can’t do that though. I am a warrior. Therefore, I have haters.

The more successful, happier, healthier I am — the more haters I gain.

We share the same “fears”: missing out on life, desire to look great and feel amazing, lead a better life.

But there is one crucial difference between me and my haters — I am taking the steps to achieve these things and I am living my dream, while they are over-consumed by their fear, frustration, and misery.

I used to think “Why I am being hated? There is no reason for these people to hate me!” Poor me, right?

I was wrong — there is a reason, there is more than just one reason for people hating me. I found 5 of them, here they are.

1. They Hate You Because You Have Choices, While They Don’t

Many would like to have a “good” life. But not everybody will put an effort to have it.

Just recently I received an envious text message which said “not everyone can have multiple vacations throughout the year as you do”. No? Of course they can, just look at Tom Kuegler he is doing just fine.

The point is, you can have multiple vacations during the year, you choose not to; you stay at your mundane job, waste time trying to drag me to your own low level, and you think I was just born privileged.

Well, I wasn’t born privileged. I worked hard in order to afford to have a vacation every month if I please so. And you know what I do during my vacation?

I work anyway, because work is fun and passion to me, not just a “must”, tedious, hard, boring mean to receive a payment at the end of the month and pay the rent to the landlord.

To the average person, becoming “successful” is so out of reach that their first thought is to discredit anyone that has great things going on.

They would rather come up with various reasons how you’ve gotten this lucky, in order to justify the impossibility of such a thing happening to them. Because that’s something they can live with.

How could a hater live with a “logical,” explanation such as “that person put in hard work, effort, and determination and reached great success? If he can do it, maybe I could do?”

By improving your life every single day, you’re telling your haters: “Look at everything I’ve done that you’ll never do” and they hate you for that.

2. They Hate You Because Secretly They are Obsessed with You

Haters actually adore you. Think about it, these people “hate” you so much that they want to learn every single thing about you. They will desperately scramble for an angle through whatever means to find out where you live, what you do for a living.

They may use this information to spread gossip about you, all the while not even knowing what’s really going on in your life. And will even go as far as stalking your workplace and the area you live in. Digging through your personal things for any information they can find on you, all types of desperate things that make them look even crazier than they already are.

No one exhausts that much energy if they really don’t like you! In fact, a person who genuinely doesn’t like you knows nothing about you and frankly doesn’t care.

They are plainly obsessed because they would like to be you.

3. They Hate You Because You’ve Moved On

This is a very common scenario in romantic relationships, but also can be found in professional life.

For example, your hater showed a romantic interest in you, you didn’t return it; you found someone better; you moved on and the hater got angry. Now they are hurt and they wish to make your life living hell.

Or in business. I remember when I was at the start of my career and I was trying to get in touch with various companies to work on certain cool AR projects, one particular person put me down in front of others stating “that their company doesn’t associate with nobodies”.

Few years passed, and I ended up working with some of the biggest and most reputable companies in the industry and a letter from this same person ended up in my mailbox, acting as if nothing happened and asking me to partner up with them, now when I am somebody.

I declined, not because of a grudge but because the timing wasn’t right, but that person didn’t take it well. Haters hate you when you move on, and especially when you prove them wrong.

4. You’ve Defeated All the Odds and You Keep Winning

When you have difficulties in your life, some people usually abandon you. But what if you turn things around? What if you stand up against all odds and emerge as a winner? What happens then?

Haters explode with envy!

After all, you are doing amazing. You’ve surpassed haters, you didn’t fail and you are reaching heights. Haters can’t stand winners.

5. You Can’t be Tamed or Controlled Anymore

If you have haters — that means that you are free. Free from fear of being judged, controlled, manipulated and you have an independent mind.

That is something a hater can’t grasp.

They would like to control things and other people, by inflicting hatred — they are trying to control you and set you up for failure. But you don't care. You can see through the game.

You’re not playing by the rules. You are setting the rules. You’re not playing to the crowd. You are speaking to them. You’re not open to manipulation. You are free.

In short, haters hate you because you are not susceptible to pathetic hatred anymore. You have better things to do. For example, use haters as an inspiration for your next bestseller novel while booking that Philippines vacation that you’ve always dreamed about!

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