4 Ways Communication Influences Dating Success and Relationships
People we can talk and relate to are more attractive
I can’t think of anything worse than two people who have nothing to say to each other on a date. Both are staring at the wall, checking the time, their phone, while politely smiling at each other, while wishing they could just stand up and leave.
Have you ever been there? I certainly have. After going through this once, I vowed never to go out for dinner on a first date.
However, it’s in these moments where communication as a contributing factor for budding romances arises. We like people who understand us, we can share laughs with, and that say interesting things. Especially when it comes to dating, communication plays a key role. We can not not communicate. Our body language continuously sends signals to the other person, finding their way into exchanging words.
Especially with online dating, new studies have shown how important a personal meeting is to find out whether you can imagine a future with someone or not. Unfortunately, that’s also the reason why first dates always make us a little nervous: We don’t know what we’re getting ourselves into.
Good conversational partners are more attractive.
Research into online dating showed that people find their future dates more attractive after a good in-person meeting. Although dating platforms like Tinder heavily focus on visuals, swiping through many profiles by seemingly picking the most attractive people, rating someone’s attractiveness by judging their profile pictures is not the best possible way to find a partner. We might miss crucial aspects such as who might make a great partner.
People who we perceive as good conversational partners are more attractive to us. This is mainly because good communicators can have a good influence on us — we feel strengthened, beautiful and significantly enhance our self-confidence.
Confidence in communication has a positive effect on body language.
In dating and attraction, body language is a crucial communication tool. It’s a complex subconscious signal system with the ability to provide unique insight into how your data is truly progressing and the important but unsaid signals being exchanged.
Body language can arguably speak louder than verbal communication. It’s simple to see the relevance of body language, attractiveness, and communication styles when dating since individuals constantly scan and evaluate the unspoken information being communicated. When we express ourselves well and receive appropriate signals from our date, we automatically enjoy ourselves more. This positive cycle further cements our desire to meet up again since we’d love to spend more time with our date.
Good communicators radiate safety and security.
But it’s not just how well we communicate that affects our date’s appeal; it’s also if the individual exudes a sense of stability and commitment. We want to know how our date feels about us and their objectives while dating and in relationships. This is why, at least to some part, uncertainty is a relationship killer.
According to several studies, it’s this sense of security we need. Furthermore, being unclear about a possible love partner’s interest in you may make you less sexually attracted to them. We tend to trick ourselves into thinking that someone is less appealing because we are frightened of disappointment. We want to know how much our date loves us, and if they don’t tell us, we’re more likely to dismiss them.
Communication goes a long way.
Good communication greatly influences the first phase of getting to know each other and later in a strengthened relationship. Only those who know themselves well, admit their own mistakes, deal with them openly, can fully commit to a relationship and live and enjoy it properly.
Other central points, which have a lot to do with a living communication culture, are continuous interest in the partner, the introduction and reception of wishes and needs, and the preservation of emotional closeness. All these things are only achievable with an understanding of each other and clear communication of this mutual understanding and support. This allows us to reveal vulnerability within a protected framework.
For me, nothing is more attractive than someone aware of their mistakes and can communicate when something is missing or when they feel stuck. Communication can be funny, profound, superficial, trite, but also sensitive and funny. Its beauty is that we can connect with people and reveal ourselves through feeling, speaking, and showing.
In my opinion, the key to a fulfilled life is to understand the world we emerged ourselves in. It’s about understanding our vulnerabilities and having the ability to voice and share them in a good way and at the right time with wonderful people. Only when we feel safe, understood, and appreciated can we imagine a relationship in the first place.
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