4 Traits of Irresistibly Attractive Men
How you can be a complete charmer.
According to Psychology Today, a pickup artist is a person who practices finding, attracting, and seducing sexual partners.
I first met Dan two years ago at a club. Because he was a friend of a friend, his pickup artist mode was off when he met me. I met him again a few months ago at that friend’s party and we got talking about our personal lives.
Dan has travelled the world and has attracted female companions wherever he goes. He’s been home since lockdown, and dating apps didn’t do too well for him because his ‘game’ is offline.
According to The Guardian,
Teaching men how to approach women they don’t know is a $100m industry.
Dan learnt his tips and tricks from a YouTube channel and used it for years to become an expert at picking up companions everywhere he goes. Here’s what I learnt from him that makes pickup artists different and at ease to attract the opposite sex.
The Bulletproof Attitude
I asked Dan if he fears getting rejected when he approaches a woman. He told me he doesn’t because he’s bulletproof.
I asked him if he’s scared of falling in love, he told me he isn’t because he’s bulletproof and is yet to experience such emotion.
For me, this is the opposite attitude. I wholeheartedly believe in love and love the butterflies I get in my tummy. I love the idea of having somebody to share your life with, and shower them with emotions. Safe to say, I am anything but ‘bulletproof’.
But being bulletproof is a pickup artist’s attitude of exploring life’s joys without dwelling on complications. It’s being fearless. It helps them open to life without living with any fears.
They’re Impromptu, unless…
Ask Dan to go on a trip with you and he’ll be game. Ask Dan to help you be a wingman and he’ll do everything in his capacity to be a good one. Speak to Dan about relationship complications and he’d take days to come up with a solution, and it won’t be the best one.
This is why they’re pickup experts and not relationship experts.
Their expertise and experience lays in doing courageous things in the moment's spur, which is why they don’t think twice about an impromptu activity.
But for a relationship, they may give you shitty advice because that’s not how they’re wired.
Go to them for the right advice.
They’re Carefree In a Way You Haven’t Seen Before
Dan is so carefree about life. And while I love that attitude of not stressing out on life’s small tensions, he’s extra too carefree.
I comprehend it’s because they live life to create the most out of these moments of joy without caring what the world thinks of them.
They’re extra confident in their skills. They’re extroverts because it’s their speaking skills that make them experts. They’re okay sitting for multiple interviews and meeting multiple women and getting rejected… and doing this all over again.
Before I met Dan, I’d never seen anybody who was so carefree and indifferent. He just never worried about his future as much as people around me stress about theirs.
Their Hormones Overpower Their Heart
This one time Dan got in a relationship, the only serious relationship he’d been in. He told me he had a fight with her and realised this isn’t the ‘headache’ he wants to sign up for.
He was definitely into the girl. He thought of them having a future together. But once he got pissed off, none of that mattered, and his emotions vanished.
This was a side to Dan I didn’t know before because to me he’s been a great friend and as a friend, he’s everything you’d want in one.
But this story gave me a boyfriend lens that was rather unpleasant, but that's because I have fairytale beliefs about relationships.
He told me it took him a week to get his emotions off the first girl he ever fell for, and now he’s ready to get back to his game. For me, it’s unimaginable to stop feeling for a person in a week who you imagined spending your life with.
According to Psychology Today,
Pickup artists can be differentiated from the bulk of the population in that they turn this normal human activity into a game — and aim to distill it down to an art form that can be improved through knowledge and rehearsal, often with a clear end-point.
But that’s what makes pickup artists stand out, a lower emotional attachment.
Conclusion
Dan’s name is obviously confidential, and this is a view of how differently many people like Dan function. The following traits make them different from other people:
- The bulletproof attitude makes them confident
- Their impromptu behaviour to take things as they come
- They’re carefree about how they live their life
- Their hormones overpower their heart
I think these skills of a pickup artist give Dan more leverage than just ‘picking up’.
It gives them the confidence to pursue life without fear and overthinking. It makes them full of life in a world we stress too much about things that don’t matter.
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