4 Powerful Approaches to Help You Shape a Mindful Minimalist Lifestyle

Expand what excites you while releasing unhelpful social conditioning.

Two years ago, I said my final goodbyes to coworkers at Facebook. I was burning out and began questioning my entire career with technology. My boss had wanted to promote me, and my friends and family would probably never understand my decision to leave.

But I’ve made a habit of pursuing alternative lifestyles that resonate more. In this case, I left the “rat race” to explore a spiritual journey.

My boldness habit began eight years ago when I discovered minimalism. I was in college, in a new dorm room, and had a claustrophobic reaction. Piles and boxes of clothes surrounded me, and after I finished crying, I knew it was time for significant changes.

Mindful minimalism means shaping an intentional, authentic lifestyle. I’ll define minimalism as a counter-cultural choice to simplify your physical and emotional space. You’re removing the unnecessary to make space for what you value most.

Within minimalism, you might emphasize things like aesthetics, frugality, extreme minimalism, or environmental sustainability. But with mindful minimalism specifically, it’s less about owning only five shirts and more about being intentional with all your lifestyle choices.

These four approaches have been highly impactful in my journey. I regularly question and release the parts of my life that don’t feel right. Whether that’s a job, a relationship, or a shirt I don’t need. Rather than striving to meet external expectations, we can make more aligned life choices.

1. Explore “happiness islands”

Some life seasons or areas of your life feel happier than others. These times are your “happiness islands.” You reflect on the parts of your life that you enjoy the most, then look for ways to expand these areas.

For example, I love being able to walk or bike everywhere. So I moved to San Francisco, which is one of the most walkable and bikeable cities in America.

I also love being physically active, so I’ve prioritized having time to do workouts and physical activities nearly every day.

The concept comes from “The 80/20 Principle” book by Richard Koch. It means about 80 percent of our happiness comes from roughly 20 percent of our activities, environments, or relationships.

The same exercise works for “achievement islands.” You can create a list of satisfying elements in your work life. Then, brainstorm ways to expand those areas and experiment.

2. Eliminate strong negatives

“Happiness is a subtraction problem. Happy people have a knack for avoiding things that make them unhappy,” — Psychologist Nick Wignall.

Sometimes it’s easier to remove things you hate. For example, if you feel excess stress while stuck in traffic, start reimagining your commute to reduce or remove that experience. Maybe you drive during different times, take remote days, work from another office, start biking, or even find a new home or job.

You can always get creative and experiment with adjustments.

This approach also works for relationships, negative thinking, or worries. For example, I rarely read the news or get involved in politics. The negative energy I experience with these activities doesn’t feel worth the potential positive impact.

3. Turn up “money dials”

Some types of spending feel way more exciting than other categories. When you discover your “money dials,” you can turn them way up. Your spending values might be convenience, freedom, relationships, self-improvement, health/fitness, generosity, or experiences.

You can usually identify your values by reflecting on spending patterns.

I found this concept in Ramit Sethi’s book, “I Will Teach You To Be Rich.” I’ve shared the idea several times because money dials have been so impactful. Here are the main steps:

• Choose your top two spending values.
• Reduce spending in less exciting areas.
• Brainstorm ways to turn up your “money dials.”

Imagine you suddenly had $25,000 to spend on anything. Your instinctive answers probably reflect your top spending values.

Most desires have been more attainable than I imagined. For example, self-improvement used to be a top spending value, and I wanted to work with a tutor for multiple life skills. That’s when I found Masterclass, an online platform with “A-list” instructors covering numerous topics for $180 per year, with unlimited class access.

This exercise motivated me to reduce non-exciting spending and feel less guilty about more aligned purchases. For example, I rarely eat at restaurants or purchase alcohol. But I’ve spent hundreds on dance classes and experiences.

4. Embrace your shadows

Shadow work refers to exploring your unconscious mind and unraveling social conditioning. You learn to separate others’ moral codes and expectations while embracing your personal beliefs and strengths. You’ll reintegrate the parts of yourself that you’ve repressed.

You can “do” shadow work using numerous approaches. For someone new to the topic, I recommend using active imagination exercises such as dancing, writing poetry, or drawing. You start with a situation or emotion, then interpret it using creativity and reflective questions:

• What does this represent?
• What does your interpretation mean?
• Are there aspects of expression that feel repressed in your daily life?
• Did you behave differently or surprise yourself?
• What are your takeaways?

Depending on your background, you may have many layers of repressed trauma. That was definitely my experience. If possible, I recommend giving yourself some accountability and support, either with a depth therapist or someone experienced who you trust.

Though it’s a more in-depth process, exploring my shadows has definitely helped me separate my more authentic self from an outward-facing role self.

Many people develop “role selves” in childhood to feel more loved or accepted in their environment. For example, I used to over-emphasize beauty and intelligence while suppressing my creativity and leadership skills.

Being intentional in shaping your lifestyle feels simpler when you know yourself more.

You always know what’s best for you. I recommend noticing which approach most resonates with you. Then, start experimenting. Also, for each lifestyle exercise I described, you can find numerous online resources if you want to dig deeper.

From moving to a walkable city to reconstructing my finances and unraveling childhood trauma, I’ve enjoyed mindful minimalism so much. Last year I took pole dance classes, an expensive hobby I never imagined I’d be doing. I also spent a year and a half with no formal job and focused on writing and engaging in soul work.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you tried any similar approaches to lifestyle design that you enjoyed? What are you hoping to make more space for in your life?

I write inspiring, uplifting, and empowering content on transformative topics. Join the Weekly Love News on my website to receive free newsletters each Tuesday in your inbox.