4 Acute Fears in Life That (if You Overcome) Will Make You Stronger

Fear should never hold you back. Perhaps you should hold your fear back.

Plato often said:

“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”

An average human being passes through 6–8 generations in their lifetime. For suppose, 80-year-olds went through:

• 1928–1945: Silent generation
• 1946–1964: Baby Boomer
• 1965–80: Generation X
• 1981–94: Millenials
• 1995–2014: Generation Z
• 2015–2030: Generation Alpha

Each generation brings along a striking discovery.

For suppose, Millenials invented social media platforms. Generation Z people like Zendaya and Mille Bobbie brown make a difference on the stage.

(Not to mention, I am from Generation Z too.) For someone who is 6 generations old lives with fear. Do you know why? Because technology is new to them!

You might have seen:

• Older people typing with thumbs
• Young people disrespect money
• … and so on…

Each generation comes with its fear/confidence quota.

The good news: these simple fears, if understood, can help us turn them into blessings. How?

Below are 6 fears (if understood) that will make a big difference in your life.

1. Breaking things

The older generations fear breaking: mobile phones, tell, and smart objects.

The current generation fears breaking: relationships, bonds, and trust.

(Harsh truth!)

Not to mention that smart objects can be repaired and restored, but relationships and bonds can never. This means all of us fear breaking things.

Though we always had this fear, we never knew what to do about it. A simple solution to this fear is to analyze the type of thing we’re dealing with and categorize them:

• Fragile
• Hard
• High maintenance
• Easy going

Classify all your problems and people in the categories above. We people can never live our lives in fear.

Knowing what type we’re dealing with gives us ease in responding and managing. Before you meet someone or order a new item, know how much effort it requires.

2. Sounding wrong

• English is the most spoken language in the world.
• English is also the second-most native language in the world.

This means that more than half of the people on this planet know English as a second language.

English is easy to learn. Believe me, English isn’t the same as what they taught us in school.

Schools will never teach you English to:

• Fight
• Sound better
• Apologize
• Much more

When the situation gets out of hand, most people stare at your face because they don’t know how to respond. It’s the same way that we dream in one language.

We rehearse fights. And if it’s not enough, there’s a slight fear. How do we combat this?

The English language is less about (is, am, was, and were) and more about using the right words in the right place. Grammar is (not) essential anymore.

• Step #1: Focus on your vocabulary—especially idioms, analogies, and phrases.
• Step #2: Use the knowledge to stop the fear of sounding naïve or childish.

3. Taking a risk

All successful people chose to take a risk, including:

• Steve Jobs
• Elon Musk
• (me)
• And (you)

Ever thought about why? Taking risks is our instinct.

For example, look at a tiny kitten who tries to jump or a bird that spreads its wings to fly. Or a caterpillar who swims on the leaves even when it’s raining.

We take risks. It’s okay if something doesn’t work out. Never be afraid to take risks. Sure. People have an ingrained fear of losing. If you never take a risk, you will never know the right path.

How can you take risks with less loss?

• Think it through.

One of the best pieces of advice I have ever gained from “When” by Daniel Pink is to think everything through.

Most people waste time selecting the right outfit. If you waste time making the right decisions, you will have a life where you won’t have to waste time on outfits.

Means: you can have a wardrobe full of clothing right at your disposal. But you have to select the time you want to spend.

Is it on:

• Outfits?
• Or decisions?

4. Say “no.”

Devrupa Rakshit wrote:

“The fear of saying no also stems from the urge to avoid conflicts or confrontations.”

Most people say “yes” and end up regretting it. Do you know why?

Because we only have a shared proportion of experiences we can have in our lives. This means that for every experience, you can either say “yes” or “no.”

For example:

When you said “yes” to an office party and “no” to your daughter’s parent-teacher meeting seminar, you lost a chance to:

• Meet with teachers
• Maybe have 1-1 conversation
• Meet your daughter’s friend
• Sound like a good father.
• Saying “no” is problematic.

Who says you have to say “no?” Sydney Nordquist wrote about interesting ways a person can say “no”:

• No, I am not interested
• Unfortunately, it’s not a good time
• I wish I could make it work
• Sounds tempting, but I have to pass
• Maybe another time

People are often used to “yes” and ‘no.” They already have a speech prepared to depend on your answer.

So you don’t agree/disagree! Use the above phrases or add more to catch people off guard. This will help you stay on your “no” grounds without fighting.

5. Remembering what to say

Are you the person who?:

• Characterizes a fight inside your head only to forget when the time comes.

For me, always!

Suppose you had a family matter, and you wanted to say many things that happened in the past, but memories won’t just pop up in your head right now.

Oh my!

People like me are too poor to remember things when a fight picks itself. After that, I wept and wailed because I thought I could have said better. So, first of all:

• Stop romanticizing situations that will never happen.

We think of situations that never occur. We’re prepared for a fight that will never happen. How can we fight with someone having remembered everything they did with us?

Psychology presents quite a few options:

• Buying time: when someone is yelling, take the time to think. Or use filler words like “umm,” “you think that?” and “shame on you” to buy some time.
• Pity looking: when someone is yelling loudly in front of people, ask them, “are you alright?” in a soft voice.
• Look at the forehand: look at the opponent’s forehead to make them uncomfortable.

Buying time gets easier with these 3 psychological tips.

Quickly use the bought time to analyze the fight and prepare memory fireballs in your head.

6. Clarity

I often said to my mom:

“Indian dramas have ruined your generation’s clarity.”

To which she replies:

“And your generation’s clarity is ruined by Netflix.”

(How touchy…)

My mother is right.

For generations, we have suffered to find clarity in the hands of soap operas. Because most people are either:

• Novel fans
• Netflix fans
• Drama fans
• Movie fans

Which, in short, is all fiction. We cannot drop fiction. Fiction is a part of our lives that brings hope, creativity, and intelligence.

How should we deal with hardship?

• Stop believing it’s true: fiction is hardly true.
• Limit screen time: only see fiction stories that are small and end well
• Stop adapting: don’t copy them

Fiction helps us refine our creativity.

Over the past few years, I’ve realized that writers spark their imagination from fiction. But it’s possible to remember the silver lining between fiction and the real world.

Just watch it for fun. Because fiction isn’t real life.

For clarity, stop adapting them. Instead, spend your time reading non-fiction books instead of watching real-life programs.

Final thoughts:

• Fear should never hold you back.
• Perhaps you should hold your fear back.

Do you know what I am saying?

Fear, if used correctly, can help you boost self-confidence, integrity, and boldness quickly.

Work on your fears and polish them to make them stronger. A person without fears is stronger.

Don’t you want to become one?

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