30 Timeless Life Lessons in 30 Years

#12. Compliments are free, be generous with them

Last month, I entered a new decade in my life.

So it was only right that I take a long look back at my twenties.

Here are 30 timeless life lessons from my 30 years on earth that I will carry forward. I hope you find meaning and inspiration in them as well.

1. Gratitude changes your life. It keeps you grounded in a positive mental space. I became a grateful person after my accident which shook me to the core and made me realize just how privileged I am in my life — I have a home, a functioning body, food on the table, financial security, family and friends who love me. Why do I complain about insignificant things when there are 65,000,000 million refugees on earth? A conscious practice of gratitude will open your eyes to the vast abundance in your life and that will change your perspective on it.
2. Travel makes you more human. Travel has allowed me to connect with the world on a deeper level and to understand what it means to feel alive. It broadened my horizons and allowed me to fall in love with this planet we call home. This made me more human, an advocate for human rights, a conscious environmentalist, and of course, more grateful for the gift of life.
3. Taking care of yourself is a priority. Self-care is necessary for your sanity and your health. It simply means that you are consciously living a lifestyle that feeds your soul, nourishes your mind, and nurtures your body. It means loving yourself for who you are today and forgiving yourself for your past because we all make mistakes and that’s what makes us human.
4. Meditation works wonders. Two years ago I spent a week in silence on top of a mountain in Sri Lanka. It was one of the most powerful experiences of my life. Meditation will help you surface the innate power within you to control your mind. It trains you to focus your attention on what’s important for you.
5. Time is precious, don’t waste it. We all have 24 hours per day. Yet, whenever we’re questioned on why we aren’t doing what it is we say we want to do, the excuse we turn to is “I don’t have time” . It’s not that you don’t have the time — it’s just that you don’t prioritize. If something really matters to you, you’ll make time for it.
6. Journaling allows you to learn more about yourself. My journal is my most valued asset. It’s worthless to you, but it’s golden to me. My journal unfolds my story. And it’s only through regular writing that I have managed to develop a deeper level of self-awareness and a better understanding of myself. Keep a journal — it’s a form of reflective meditation and a medium to tap in and converse with yourself.
7. Write down your goals. Seriously. I only began achieving my goals when I began inking them in my journal. And one central theme that has always resurfaced in my habit of journaling is how written goals of the past manifest themselves as achievements in the future.
8. It’s okay to be lost. Everyone is just “figuring it out”. No one has the answers. Life is a series of phases. When you’re in college, you’re figuring out how to be a young adult. When you become a parent, you’re figuring out how to be one. So it’s okay to be lost — everyone is or was at some point. But what’s important is that you don’t use “being lost” as an excuse to fall into the trap of indecision.
9. It’s not about the how, it’s about the where. Sailing has taught me that in life, it’s important to be decisive and point in a direction and say, I want to go there. Because it is only when you have a destination in mind that you begin to adjust your sails and tack with the wind until you get there. You need to be moving towards something in life — a goal, a direction or destination. Don’t dwell on the details, just get started. How you’ll get there is something that will unravel as you begin the journey towards that destination.
10. Be a doer, not a talker. With time you will realize that there are people who only talk about their dreams and people who are actively working for the chance of realizing those dreams. Choose to be the latter. Discussing ideas is wonderful, but the magic happens in doing, not in talking.
11. Have fun — don’t take everything so seriously. Life is a blessing. Enjoy it, celebrate it. Laugh more. Dance more. Sing more. Smile more. See that joy in living and have fun doing what you do. Stop taking yourself or your circumstances too seriously.
12. Compliments are free, be generous with them. It’s so easy to criticize. But excessive criticism will get you in a habit of negative thinking. Instead, learn to give more compliments — they’re free, they’re likeable and they help you manifest a positive mindset.
13. Appreciate the present. Because any one moment in time can change the course of your life, forever. That’s because change is inevitable; it’s the only constant in life. Be present — with your friends and family — and learn to appreciate what you have today because at any moment tomorrow it can be taken away from you.
14. Stop complaining — if you don’t like something, change it. Seriously. If you’re unhappy with certain circumstances, ask yourself how can I get out of it, not why did this happen to me? Rather than complain about not having what you want, choose to go after it.
15. What you do today is a reflection of who you will become tomorrow. Want to know where you’ll be in a year’s time? Look at what you’re doing today. You aspire to be a writer? Well, are you writing today? You want to be in the best shape of your life. That’s great, but did you exercise today? You become your habits — you are what you repeatedly do.
16. Self-awareness is the first step toward positive change. Learn to dedicate some alone time so you can spend it with yourself to learn more about who you are. This helps you better understand yourself, your place in this world and what value you can contribute to it.
17. Change happens at the 1%. If you want to succeed in building a new habit, you need to understand that sustainable change only happens when you are consistent over a long period of time. Focus on small, consistent, tiny gains. If you put in the daily work in to get 1% better each day, you’ll end up 37x better by the end of that year. Good things take time. Move slowly, move steadily and eventually, you’ll get there.
18. Negative circles can bring you down — stay out of them. You are the average of the five people you spend your most time with. If your circle is negative, life-sucking, dream-crushing, energy-draining, always-complaining group of “friends”, then take a guess as to where you’ll be heading in your life. If you think that same circle will propel you upwards, think again.
19. Collect experiences not things. Things break. They collect dust. They might even be forgotten over time. Experiences live with you forever. You will always remember the day you went skydiving, the travels with your friends, the week you volunteered at an orphanage. Through experiences, you grow, curate memories, build relationships and gain wisdom in life.
20. Change is hard, but it’s necessary. If you wish to grow, stay out of your comfort zone. Because that’s the space where personal growth happens. That’s where you will be pushed to learn more about yourself: who you are, what you enjoy doing and what’s important to you in your life — what really matters.
21. Fulfillment happens when you give more in life. That’s another benefit of experiences. When you volunteer, you give your time to help someone in need. When you travel to a new country and chat with locals, you give them an opportunity to learn more about your culture. Give more to the world than you take from it and you will feel more fulfilled.
22. The greatest healers in life are free. Nature. Hugs. And laughter. They are free, they cure, and they bring warmth into your heart. Nature calms you, laughter has the magic to revive you and one hug from a close friend will remind you that you are loved.
23. Living with less will allow you to live with more. This only happens when you become aware of your mindless consumption habits. Rid yourself of needless plastic, needless waste, and needless spending. You’ll save more money and you’ll reduce your impact on the environment. It’s a win-win!
24. Be kind, be real, be you. You don’t know what troubles people are going through. Injuries are silent — just because you can’t see scars, doesn’t mean they doesn’t exist. Be mindful of that. Be kind to others and to yourself. Be authentic. Seriously. No one is perfect and no one has it all figured out, so don’t act like you do. We are all human and what makes us that is emotion: vulnerability, joy, passion, love. Show it and share it.
25. Befriend fear, don’t fight it. Fear is omnipresent. It is not something to be overcome, because somehow, somewhere it always resurfaces. The secret to fear is to make it your friend, not your enemy. Become allies with it — that’s how you reduce the friction with fear — and channel it into an action. With time, the more wins you can accumulate with fear, the more fearless you will become.
26. You only learn by doing — so keep exploring your creative ideas. You are a high school student for four years but a student of the school of life until the day you die. So never stop learning. And the best way to learn is to explore your creative ideas. Test them out! You might fall and fail. But that’s fine. You’ll just get back up again and try it in another way. Only this time, you’ll have more experience, and thus, you’re more likely to succeed.
27. Sacrifice is part of the equation to get to where you want — reward is on the other side of it. That’s because there’s always a trade-off. You want financial security? You’ll need to trade-in your freedom of lavish spending and start saving. You want to launch a successful company? You need to trade-in a certain comfortable lifestyle. You want to have 10% body fat? You need to sacrifice laziness and comfort for a commitment to healthy eating and exercise.
28. You always have a choice. The secret to meaningful growth in life is to utilize your finite energy in the most efficient, optimal and positive way possible. It’s that simple. In any given situation, there will be factors that you can control and and others that you can’t — which ones will you focus your energy on?
29. You define success — not society — so the less you care about what people think, the happier you’ll be. I’m 30. I have little savings but I’ve lived in 6 countries, traveled half the world, and currently striving to build a successful business. My friend has lived in one country and worked since college, but he has $20,000 in his bank account and owns a house. Who is more successful? It doesn’t matter what society thinks. You do you, and you stay true to your calling. That’s what makes you successful — and happy.
30. Everything will be okay. Life is beautiful, and then it is ordinary. There are ups, and there are downs, but everything is going to be okay. It’s normal to go through tough patches. Just remember that somewhere over the dense grey clouds, the sun is shining. We will always be faced with heavy winds and rough seas, all we can do is adjust our sails and journey on.

Wherever you are in your life’s journey, just make sure you stay true to yourself, create good for the people and the planet, and enjoy this gift of life while doing so.