3 Pointers to Stop a Playboy in His Tracks Before It’s Too Late

The only arsenal you need in your checkbox.

Falling in love has never been easier. Online dating has made love so accessible that it’s as easy as filling out a compatibility quiz or swiping left to pick a date.

But before you enter into a relationship with someone, they have to meet some criteria on your list.

Is he tall, athletic, and has a sense of humor? Does he show compassion to the stranger sitting next to him on a bus? Is he confident about himself, his goal, and his decisions? Does he respect the barista who serves him at the coffee shop?

Too often, the players meet our list. The problem is we narrow our searches to a specific group of people so we miss the chances of attracting the right people — the ones with genuine feelings.

If you are on a search for a long-term partner, you may be missing a few steps on your check-mate list. So stick around to know what those are to avoid making an irreversible mistake.

How to outsmart a deceitful person without trying so hard

Getting to know a person behind their words requires a critical analogy that most people don’t practice. Players hit us with the right words, but their actions speak more volumes if you are paying attention.

You will have to separate your emotions to know if someone is real, or not. But what if you are a love-struck person and can’t trust your feelings to guide you?

What then?

Well, don’t worry. I’m here to reveal some questions that get the players out of their shelves and expose the real person behind the mask. So to know if you are dealing with a man of integrity or a player, asking these questions can help you know who they are.

#1. Check how he rates his friends

You know what they say, show me your friends, and I will tell you who you are. This statement works too often.

I’m a friendly person, but I have two people I value dearly and that is because we all have similar personalities. We don’t envy each other, we focus on ourselves and our careers, and we aren’t afraid to call a thing ‘white or black’ as it is.

Friends are people we can trust and are loyal to. And not people we benefit from. That’s why most people do not have friends.

We feel happier without friends if the people around us show no concern about us — our problems and our aspiration but have no qualms dumping theirs on us.

If you want to know whether the person you are dating is sincere about their feelings or if they are playing you, take their response about friendship seriously.

You can tell if a person values their friends or not by the way they describe their friends. If they say only nice things about their friends, do not believe them. No one is that good without flaws.

If they say only bad things about their friends, then you should be concerned because it’s either they are bad friends or they have no friends at all. And you rarely see a trustworthy person without friends.

#2. Find out his greatest accomplishment

If you’ve ever dated a player, you will know they are all about themselves and their success.

Well, it won’t hurt to feed their ego if you dig deeper. When someone is trying to impress you, they can easily slip and reveal a side of them most people don’t see.

When I ask my dates what accomplishments made a difference in their lives, honest people usually relate a story about humanity. How they saved a dying friend, a job, or an award that taught them some moral value.

Too often, honest people are more about changing themselves or improving their careers. They do not spend their time wondering how to look appealing to the latest chic on the block.

But the players will rant about the awards or success that boost their ego. Their game is to look irresistible, so faking accomplishment that makes them look grounded sells their ego.

If you want to know if someone is honest about their feelings, when you ask about their accomplishment, watch out for compliments that exaggerate the story they tell.

If he tells you how he won an award as the best humanitarian person in the world and yet, he is arrogant to you and everyone else, that is enough to open your eyes to his true character. It’s wise to expect one’s accomplishment to match their true character.

3. What is his reaction to expensive jokes?

I’m sure you will agree that calling someone ‘fatty’ or ‘fat’ is rude. Some fat people are insecure about their bodies, so calling them fat is like adding salt to the injury.

What if the person doesn’t call you fat, but says “I’d love to hug you now but, my ribs will probably crack before I can wrap my arms around you.”

That may sound cute, however, it’s an indirect way of calling the person fat. Isn’t it?

When someone is pretending to be friendly, they use sarcasm a lot to hide a direct attack on your image or body.

You may think their compliment is cute but when you take a close look at the meaning of what they said, you will notice you do feel awful if the statement is described in one or two words.

When someone insults you, the perfect reaction will be to call them out immediately. Like the GI Jane joke, Chris pulled on Jada Smith about her shaved hair.

We impulsively react to abuse even when they are framed as jokes. We get offended and may fire back with a similar joke, or take things extreme and hit them as Will Smith did to Chris.

If his responses show that he doesn’t take sarcastically disguised abuse seriously, you can bet he is either an abuser or he expects you not to take insults personally when he does it.

And if he retaliates verbally or physically, there is a possibility he has some unresolved temper issues. This doesn’t mean he’s inherently a bad person.

How a person reacts in a certain situation can tell how disciplined they are towards their emotions. If they go off the book repeatedly, that’s who they are, and you should be worried about your safety.

But if they always act unbothered, then they’re possibly pretending not to be offended, and that should be a sign they are not honest about themselves.

Casual relationships often take out the complication in deciding if a person is right for you or not. When you’re dating someone casually, you may not be interested in who they are because you don’t want to attach any feelings to them.

But it doesn’t hurt to know more about the person you’re dating. And if you are looking to take your casual relationship to a permanent phase, then you will need an ace up your sleeve when choosing a life partner.

Some people are indeed good at faking their character, but no one can stay fake for so long if you communicate in the right direction.

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