24 Nuggets of Wisdom I've Learned in 24 years

All of my life lessons so far ranging from food to books

I had a birthday a fair few months ago, and it feels slightly late to write this. However, I've had some time to reflect on what I've learned in the twenty-four years that I have been alive.

It's a cliche to want to avoid ageing or growing up. But, if you're anything like me, once you hit over twenty-one, birthday's suddenly start to lose their sparkle. Ageing has now become a depressing factor of life, rather than something to get excited about.

I like birthdays for their sense of accomplishment and reflection. Another year older, another year wiser, as they say. Here's everything I've learned along the way.

Try and do a small about of something you love every day

Life is short. Increasingly so as you age. I learnt that the hard way when I lost my brother in 2020. He was only 24. Although it was a horrendous nightmare I never thought would happen to me, it taught me about perspective and priorities. From that point, I always made sure to read or write at least once a day.

The best things in life really are free

Cliche's are cliches for a reason. This one doesn't get an exemption. All of my favourite things are free. Sunrises, sunsets, walking, autumn leaves, a winter frost, laughing, seeing my partner's smile. The more I get older, the more I realise that money cannot buy happiness; that's why we have to see the potential in every day.

Reading is always worth it

In my late teens, I lost my way with reading. At university, I never read for pleasure as my degree course was reliant on getting through dense, academic texts. Now that I'm out of that, I've allowed myself to fall in love with reading again, and it adds so much value to my life.

Education in all forms is invaluable

Fiction, poetry, reality TV, podcasts, documentaries, self-help books, art, films, and academic degrees — are all valuable and help build our worldview. Education isn't just numbers, facts or figures, but expanding our horizons and challenging our preconceptions. So many different mediums can do that.

Death makes you realise who you're real friends are

Losing people is horrible. But it's an unavoidable part of life. When you first have your real experience of losing someone, it can be hard to cope. It also tests your relationship with others. You'll soon find out who reaches out and who doesn't bother. That's a lesson all in itself.

Coffee is the only drug worth submitting to

Been there, done that, tried it and came out on the worse side of it. After a particularly bad experience with cannabis — which resulted in long term disassociation and losing touch with reality — it's safe to say that drugs are never worth it. Coffee, on the other hand, is. It helps me feel energised, alive and has other health benefits.

Mental health should always come first

This is non-negotiable. We all have mental health, but too many of us neglect to please others rather than ourselves. Anxiety and people-pleasing go hand in hand. But there are moments in life where you must put yourself first. I'm still working on this one, but it's so important.

Alcohol is overrated

Although it revolves around any occasion, social gathering, or event, it's not worth it. If you don't want to drink, you don't have to. You don't have to conform to societal expectations. If you feel better without it, then go for it. It is up to others need to accept and respect that decision.

Family is far more than blood

Biology can only go so far. But when you haven't known your biological parents your whole life, it's meaningless. The family are the people that raised you and have been there for you throughout your life. There are the people you go to for support. It goes beyond blood.

You are more than your problematic skin

Imperfections are beautiful. Flawless skin would be nice, but it's far from reality. Sleepless nights, problematic hormones, a tad too much sugar, that's more realistic. It's not what's on the surface that counts, but underneath. Anyone worth knowing will not take a second look at your skin but appreciate you for who you are as a person.

Communication is imperative for any relationship

Friendships, relationships, work colleagues, and everything in between is dependent on communication. Miscommunication can break hearts, cause arguments and unnecessary disagreements. It's so easy to do nowadays as we speak more over text and messaging. But clear communication will keep every relationship strong.

Never underestimate the power of a good pillow

It took me months of convincing myself I had a brain tumour to realise my severe neck pain and constant aches were from sleeping on a crappy pillow. We spend the equivalent of 26 years asleep, so it's imperative we give ourselves a supportive pillow to sleep on.

Food is fuel and something to be enjoyed

You need food to live. Never deprive yourself of something because you 'overindulged' the day before. Eat that slice of cake. Have that takeaway if you fancy it. Health isn't binary. Everything should be enjoyed in moderation. Ignore the bullshit that diet culture has fed us since we were old enough to be walking. Eat that bread. Eat that cake. Enjoy every mouthful.

You don't need to wash your hair every other day

The less you wash it, the better. Your hair needs to know when to get dirty on its own and replenish its own oils. By overwashing it, it can't do this, so it will get greasier quicker. It may feel or look greasy to you, but chances are, nobody else will notice. I used to wash my hair every other day as a teenager, and it was as dry as a bail of hay.

People will judge you for whatever you do (good and bad)

You can never please everybody. There will always be people who don't like you. Being yourself is hard, but made easier when you realise you are never going to make everybody happy.

It's not about wealth, but having enough to live

There's more to life than having an endless supply of money. We all need enough to comfortably live and be able to do the things we want to do, but an excess has never done anybody any good. Striving for wealth is going to set you up for disappointment and unhappiness in the long run.

Caring about politics is important, but you can't let it overwhelm your life

Use your vote. Have meaningful conversations with people in your life who may differ from you politically. Keep up to date and be aware of what's happening in the world and how it affects you. But don't let it take over your life. Turn off twenty-four-hour news notifications and tune in when you can.

Social media should be consumed mindfully

Easier said than done, but every social media platform is essentially a form of bragging, a highlight real and a FOMO inducer. It doesn't do any of us any good. In fact, it causes a lot of harm. Try to distance yourself from it, or have an afternoon or day where you don't use it at all. You'll feel better. Doomscrolling is never a good idea, regardless of how bad you feel.

A good book can change the world

Fiction, memoir, non-fiction or poetry collections — books are wonderful because they can change how we think. They are beautiful moments and thought processes bound together by pages and chapters. They transport us away from the world when we need it and also force us to confront it. Reading is not a luxury but a necessity. Everybody has time for it if they let it into their lives.

It's okay to be selfish

Sometimes we can be so concerned with the happiness of others that we forget about ourselves. It's important to take a step back sometimes and put ourselves first. We know when we feel burnt out, tired or tun down. On those days or even weeks, it's completely okay to be selfish.

Exercise shouldn't be a form of punishment

It's not about the distance we run or the calories we burn but about moving our bodies in a way that makes us feel good. For years, I viewed exercise as a form of punishment. A way of targeting a body I hated or expressing the frustration I had for overeating that day. Exercising is about improving your mind first and foremost; breaking the cycle is essential to form a good relationship with it.

Never underestimate the power of sleep

I've had my fair share of sleepless nights and bouts of insomnia, usually when I'm at my lowest and my anxiety is at an all-time high. When this hits, I always appreciate a good nights sleep and how important it is. We need sleep to live, concentrate and be amicable beings — remember that.

This has been sitting in my drafts folder untouched for a few months, but I'm glad it's now out in the world. I'm not particularly keen on the whole ageing thing anymore, but it's nice to reflect on how far I've come.

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