21 Sure Signs You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Are you in an abusive relationship?

If you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship, you may not even realize it. Many victims are in denial or simply don’t want to see the signs. Others think that things will change or that they can make things work.

Unfortunately, this is not usually the case.

There are warning signs present in emotionally abusive relationships, and if you can identify them, you’re well on your way to getting out of the relationship safely and permanently.

Being in an abusive relationship is incredibly dangerous. Don’t wait until it’s too late. Get help today. You deserve better than this.

Here are 21 signs that you’re involved with an emotionally abusive partner.

1. You’re always walking on eggshells

In an abusive relationship, you should never be made to feel guilty or ashamed. Yet somehow, your partner always finds a way to make it seem like everything is your fault.

If you take a look back at the past few weeks and pinpoint every argument you’ve had, there’s a good chance that you did something to provoke your partner.

2. You’re always apologizing

If you can’t remember the last time you had a real apology from your partner, something is very wrong. If you can’t express your own feelings without getting yelled at, talked over, or threatened, the relationship is emotionally abusive.

3. You’re always making excuses for your partner’s behavior

There’s a difference between defending yourself and making excuses for someone else. You can’t make up for another person’s actions and behaviors. If your partner is doing something wrong (i.e., cheating or lying), it’s your job to call them out on it.

4. You’re made to feel inferior

Once again, you should never be made to feel like your partner is better than you in any way. If this person constantly puts you down or makes belittling jokes, it’s time for them to go. There’s no reason why you should make excuses for this kind of bad behavior.

5. Your partner doesn’t respect your boundaries

If you’ve told your partner several times that you don’t like it when they do something (i.e., checking up on you, reading your texts), and they still do it anyway, then there’s a problem. You should feel comfortable enough to tell your partner how you really feel without the fear of being yelled at or made to feel guilty.

6. You don’t know where they are when they’re out with friends

If you don’t know where your partner is, this could be a sign that they’re either cheating or trying to hide something from you. Either way, it’s not acceptable and definitely not okay. If your partner cannot bring themselves to be honest with you, then the relationship is probably going to fail eventually anyway.

7. This person makes constant threats

Threats are a huge red flag in any relationship. But if your partner uses them on you, then there’s a problem. You don’t deserve to be threatened with physical or emotional pain because you’re not holding up your end of the deal. If this person is resorting to these kinds of tactics, then that’s unacceptable and it’s time for you to go.

8. They’re always checking up on you

There’s an old saying that goes, “If you love someone set them free.” This isn’t only true in romantic relationships, but also in friendships and other types of relationships.

No one has the right to keep tabs on your every move, yet this is exactly what happens in an abusive relationship. If your partner demands to know where you are at all times, then something is very wrong.

9. They always have an excuse for their abuse

There’s never an acceptable reason for being physically and emotionally abusive towards someone. If your partner has tried to convince you that it’s okay, then they’re just making excuses for their behavior and you should drop them immediately.

10. Your partner doesn’t trust you

Intimacy is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, but this person’s lack of trust might be a red flag. You might feel like you’re constantly being watched and interrogated. But this kind of behavior is unacceptable after a certain point. You don’t need someone to make you feel guilty for something that isn’t your fault.

11. They have problems controlling their anger

Everyone is prone to having a temper at times, but your partner can’t control it when they get angry. If this person is directing their rage towards you instead of taking responsibility for it, then that’s different from what healthy relationships are like.

You don’t deserve to be on the receiving end of this kind of abuse, so you should leave if they don’t intend to change.

12. You don’t believe that this person could love you

It might seem unusual to say that a partner doesn’t love their significant other, but it happens more often than you think. If your partner shows no interest in getting to know you or accepts you for who you are, then there’s a problem. You deserve someone that loves and respects you unconditionally — don’t let this person convince you otherwise.

13. This person thinks too highly of themselves

If this person has delusions of grandeur, it might be a sign of emotional abuse. This kind of behavior is an attempt to control your life because they don’t think that you deserve to have your own opinions or interests. You have the right to be respected just as much as anyone else, so if this person doesn’t see that, then it’s time for them to go.

14. Your partner doesn’t think that they’ve done anything wrong

If your partner can brush off their behavior as nothing, then you should really question the kind of person they are. Abuse is never acceptable, and if this person truly believes that it’s not a problem, then they aren’t worth your time.

15. You feel like you can’t do anything right

You might be in an emotionally abusive relationship if you feel like everything is your fault. You should never blame yourself for the abuse that this person inflicts upon you, so it’s time to take your leave if they won’t accept accountability for their actions.

16. Your significant other tries to make you feel guilty about everything

Abusive partners are constantly trying to make you feel like the victim in this situation, but that’s not true. You don’t deserve to feel guilty for something that isn’t your fault, and you especially don’t deserve to be constantly interrogated about it. Your partner needs to respect your boundaries, and if they can’t do that, then they aren’t worth staying with.

17. They constantly try to control you

Abusive partners don’t like it when you do anything that they disapprove of, and that’s not okay. You deserve to make your own decisions without having someone else telling you how to live your life. If this person can’t respect your choices, then you should take a critical review of the relationship.

18. This person isn’t willing to compromise

Compromise is an essential part of any healthy relationship, but this person just doesn’t want to meet you halfway. You might feel like you’re constantly fighting for what’s important to you because your partner can’t be bothered with making these sacrifices.

19. They constantly try to change the subject

If this person keeps changing the subject even when you’re trying to have a serious conversation, then they might be an abuser. Abusers only want to talk about certain things, so if your partner can’t stand talking about a serious issue, there’s a problem.

You deserve someone that’s willing to have mature conversations with you, so you should take your leave if this person can’t do that.

20. You can never trust them

You might be in an emotionally abusive relationship if you feel like you can’t trust your partner even one bit. It’s important for everyone to have a degree of transparency within their relationships because it builds trust, but if this person is hiding things from you, then that’s a sign of trouble.

You deserve someone that respects your right to privacy as much as you do theirs, so it’s time for you to leave this harmful situation.

21. You’ve lost all of your confidence

If you’ve felt like something is wrong for a while but can’t explain why then it’s time to assess the situation. Confidence is a huge part of your character because it dictates how you behave around others, and if this person has eroded all of that away from you, then there’s a problem. You might be in an emotionally abusive relationship if you feel like you can’t do anything right.

And the bottom line is…

If an abusive person has made you feel like you’re not worth anything, then they don’t deserve your time. It might be difficult to say goodbye to someone after months or years of dating, but if this person can’t see your value, then it’s all for the best. You deserve better than an emotionally abusive relationship, so make the smart choice and take your leave.

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