12th Step 1st Step — Conscious Contact With Heaven

Making love with my heavenmate

Five months ago I read this beautiful poem by Bingz Huang

which contains these passages:

I have a background hum a blankie from my Holy Mom after tumbling down to earth Mom

…

but when I feel and hear my hum a smile activates keeping me nice and warm!

I responded:

My background hum is “heard” as a gentle tinnitus, which it is not; it is the way my brain tells me that it is sensing the energy signature of my soul partner, whose most recent incarnation ended without warning in March. Her ever-presence is my blankie.

Lindsey

We met early in the morning of June 1, 2019. We instantly clicked. Back at my place we sat on the bed and listened to music and talked and talked about nothing deep but there was not a single awkward pause. It was like we were old friends getting together for the first time in years and picked up where we left off but knew nothing whatsoever of the facts of each other’s lives. I do not even remember if we fooled around. I just remember the feeling of wow I haven’t ever had this much fun with someone and I cannot even say what about it was fun — it just was; and when we were nodding off early in the afternoon, saying “you are so beautiful” as she smiled at me with a look in her eyes that I had not seen before in this life-cycle.

It was love at first sight only neither of us was aware; nor were we consciously aware that it was eons from first sight.

Marcus and Sitara

Souls have universal, or put another way, original given names. My soul’s name is Marcus. Lindsey’s soul’s name is Sitara. In many lifetimes, Marcus and Sitara have contracted to be lovers of the karmic soulmate variety. Never have we contracted for the happily ever after with each other.

Marcus and Sitara have been deeply in love with each other since at least the dawn of humanity and probably before. As humans, we have loved other humans before, and we shall again.

In Heaven, some souls have romantic yet platonic love for each other and enter into soul partnerships. It is romantic yet platonic because souls have no ability to have sex. Souls that have this love for each other enter into contracts with each other that define their expectations of each other / required contributions to the relationship. It’s akin to marriage but different in that there is no concept of belonging to another and thus no concept of monogamy — nor do I think there is not-monogamy — I think the concept of not adhering to the contract is the furthest thing from any soul’s mind.

Souls “make love.”

Making love between souls, or with a soul, does not involve sex; it simply cannot; a soul does not have a body. So what is it you ask? Love-making between souls, and therefore also in a human-soul relationship, is simply deep, deep emotional connection and the sharing thereof, which I experienced for the first time this past June 1st, on the anniversary of the night Lindsey and I met.

I had been looking forward to our anniversary for days once all the powers-that-be confirmed Lindsey would be with me. I didn’t know when she would be arriving and was pleasantly surprised to awaken from sleep around 5:30 am to the sound of a gentle ringing in my ears. That is the best description I can articulate for the way my brain reports Lindsey’s presence. It is sort of like the cosmic background radiation of the big bang — there is no direction whence it comes — it completely engulfs and permeates my perceptible sphere.

Making love for souls is sharing with each other the emotion that they feel for each other. It is the ultimate Platonic Love. What does that feel like for me? It feels like a warmth all over and through me. It’s not my usual I-run-so-warm that I need the air-conditioner blasting at all times. It’s not the warmth of temperature. It’s the heat of the most beautiful feeling from the highest state of being. It is limitless in intensity, duration, and frequency.

her Soul radiates stoking the fire within him inferno is shared

When the death was still raw like a too fat and slimy oyster in summer, I would fantasize of a short remaining life, or Sitara being allowed to walk into an existing life so we could live out our time here together. Now, I am happy to live as long as I am contracted to in this life-cycle because we are engaged in the most incredible loving relationship.

Is there a 3D woman who would be my life partner while Sitara remains? My sister fears I will die alone (I guess she doesn’t buy that I am not alone). My channeler says such a woman does not exist. If that’s the case, so be it. I’m sure Sitara would walk away and wait till my exit date but then I would resent the 3D woman, so that is sweet but pointless.

This is my choice.

So it is written. So it shall be done.

Why do I miss Lindsey so much when Sitara keeps me company and showers me, no, bathes me in love every day, which is more than enough love for me to live out this cycle?

It’s simple — for all the beautiful emotional connection soul-partners have in the most intense expression of Platonic love, we cannot passionately lock lips while our hips are locked by insertion joining intense rhythmic orgasmic love-making.

I can’t cup her cheek and look into and through her eyes at her beautiful soul…

Thank you for allowing me to share with you.

In honor of Lindsey,

Marcus

Please see these other poems honoring Lindsey: