10 Things I Hope to Do When I Feel Better
My hope-to-do list
Now that I’m unwell, isolating and bedridden, I have a yearning to do so much. Isn’t that always the case? I feel so guilty to be sleeping all day as the medications I take make me drowsy.
This is my wishful thinking list. I achieved this during the pandemic but haven’t had the will or energy to do it since.
- Wake up at 6 am and go for a walk. I won’t terrorise myself too much to achieve any number of steps as that seems so military.
- Play the piano and enjoy it
- Read an actual book. Perhaps a chapter. I have been listening to audio books but I desperately miss reading a book the old way.
- Have greens. Raw spinach is best. I prefer salads to cooked green vegetables which I find bitter. Maybe it’s a hangover from childhood.
- Visit my nieces and nephews. Pure joy. I miss it so much.
- Go with my partner to old and new places. I have less anxiety when we are out exploring. My mind needs it.
- Make that dentist appointment I’ve been dreading. I just don’t trust the dentist even though I have zero cavities. I have weak gums though. I’m pretty worried about my receding gums as my cousin recently had to have dentures made. Similar genes but I’m terrified to go down that route.
- Just go out and not be confined to the home. Being stuck indoors makes you feel more sick.
- To have more energy to mop the floor and declutter. Always feel loads better after I do this. It’s therapeutic.
- Read and write more on Medium. This I never stopped doing but I just haven’t been writing as much. I need to be more organised when it comes to my writing. Right now it’s whenever inspiration strikes.
Even after reading the above list, it seems like it’s not enough. I have this relentless need to be productive and feelings of deficiency when I’m not. I know it’s so unhealthy to think this way. The result of growing up in a society which punishingly demands you constantly grind.
Is there anything you hope to do but just can’t seem to get done yet?
Maybe I should try to be ok with doing nothing. Just the thought of that gives me the shudders if I’m being completely honest with you.
I’m so excited that Eva MacInnes attempted this list too. She writes so beautifully.