THE QUEST FOR QUALITY, PART 1

10 Quality Quotes About Quality

A guide to amuse and confuse you

People have been trying to unravel the meaning of quality since ancient times.

You could almost say it’s a tradition of heritage.¹

Here are ten quotes by nine brilliant people and one celebrity about quality.

To paraphrase Bill and Ted, this should be a most excellent adventure.

1. Sun Tzu

Unlike most modern bloggers, the author of The Art of War was an expert in his field. And unlike m̶o̶s̶t̶ all generals since that time, Sun Tzu used force as a last resort:

“His works focus much more on alternatives to battle, such as stratagem, delay, the use of spies and alternatives to war itself, the making and keeping of alliances, the uses of deceit and a willingness to submit, at least temporarily, to more powerful foes.”

But when it came to understanding quality, he doesn’t provide much insight for writers:

“The quality of decision is like the well-timed swoop of a falcon which enables it to strike and destroy its victim.” — Sun Tzu

I’ll remember that gem if I ever go to assassin school.

2. Aristotle

There are a lot of good things I could say about Aristotle, but I won’t mention them here.

All I can see is the quote that launched a thousand terrible, tedious, mind-numbing, awful self-help articles.

“Quality is not an act. It is a habit.” — Aristotle

This non-definition reminds me of a joke that might be as old as Aristotle:

A man goes to prison and the first night he’s laying in bed contemplating his situation. He hears someone yell out, “44!” followed by laughter from the other prisoners.

He thought that was pretty odd, then he heard someone else yell out, “72!” Followed by even more laughter.

“What’s going on?” he asked his cellmate.

“Well, we’ve all heard every joke so many times, we’ve given them each a number to make it easier.”

“Oh,” he says, “can I try?”

“Sure, go ahead.”

So, he yells out “102!” and the place is dead quiet save for a few groans. Confused, he looks at his cellmate who is shaking his head.

“Hey, what happened?”

“Well, some people can tell a joke, some people can’t.”

Next time I have an idea for a story, I’ll write a number in place of the text.

Think of how much time I’ll save!

3. Seneca the Younger

Once again, we must visit ancient Rome.

(Don’t worry — there will be no tedious regurgitation of Marcus Aurelius.)

Here’s a famous quote that has inspired countless numbers of “experts” writing online today.

“It is quality rather than quantity that matters.” — Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Seneca must not have read those brilliant how-to articles that encourage you to post three times a day.

4. Leonardo da Vinci

If you think getting recognition on this site is tough, don’t hold your breath about getting into heaven. Even the great Leonardo felt frustrated by the eternal Curator of his soul.

“I have offended God and mankind because my work didn’t reach the quality it should have.” — Leonardo da Vinci

The lesson here is we need to find a better definition for the word quality.

And learning about humility wouldn’t be a bad idea, either.

5. Herman Melville

Like the Great White Whale, the meaning of quality continues to elude us. This great literary figure skirts around the edges of quality the same way astronomers try to measure a black hole.

“Is there some principal of nature which states that we never know the quality of what we have until it is gone?” — Herman Melville

If Melville could carry a tune he could have been his era’s Joni Mitchell:

Don’t it always seem to go, That you don’t know what you’ve got Til its gone They paved paradise And put up a parking lot

6. Johan Cruyff

One of soccer’s greatest players and coaches, voted European Player of the Century, and second behind Pelé for World Player of the Century, Cruyff was an athlete, an artist, and a social advocate.²

“Quality without results is pointless. Results without quality is boring.” — Johan Cruyff

I feel so warm and fuzzy.

Even if he couldn’t define quality, his quote captures our collective existence on this site.

As wordsmiths, we slave over words in anonymity and question the purpose of our work.

As readers, we try to stay awake, wading through a literary landfill of mega-popular self-help articles, in the hopes of finding something valuable.

7. Henry Ford

If anybody represented a break from the past, it was Henry Ford.

He was like the Elon Musk of his time, except Ford worked to put cars in the hands of every American, instead of building spaceship rides for billionaires.

The assembly line led him to dream of a system that could guarantee a consistent level of quality.

Maybe we should think of him as the McDonald’s of automobiles.

“Quality means doing it right when no one is looking.” — Henry Ford

While the assembly line increased production efficiency, there was little connection with quality. By 1924, General Motors invented planned obsolescence and all the others followed soon after.

Do you remember what Ford and Firestone did, even though everyone was looking?

8. Tony Robbins

Is there anything better than listening to self-help gurus tell us about the virtues of successful people?

Especially the ones who berate rape victims and allegedly sexually harass women.

“Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.” — Anthony Robbins

I know that thousands of people swear by this guy, so I can’t call him a snake oil salesman. Fuck it, I will.

Giving people hope and draining their bank accounts are not mutually exclusive — look at every homophobic closeted TV preacher who lives like a sultan off the backs of thousands of poor believers.

Robbins defines quality as success, so I have to ask:

• Why is it scientifically proven that rich people are more likely to be selfish assholes who don’t think the rules apply to them?
• Why are so many CEOs borderline sociopaths?
• Why does 30% of our population admire a lying, immoral, scamming, pussy-grabbing miscreant?

Tony World turned out to be just another bogus journey.

9. Steve Jobs

The founder of Apple used a symbol as American as mom and apple pie and turned it into something about as decipherable as Russian.

“Quality is more important than quantity. One home run is much better than two doubles.” — Steve Jobs

While Jobs was a tech genius, he had no understanding of baseball, as two doubles drive in the same number of runs as a home run and a strikeout. Even worse, it downplays the psychological pressure put on a pitcher when there are no outs with a man on second. (And pardon the baseball aside, but a long at-bat leading to a walk will give a team a better chance at a big rally than a lead-off home run.)

10. George Carlin

I prefer George Carlin’s take on “One man’s meat is another man’s poison.” He’s my go-to guy when it comes to understanding the absurd, arbitrary algorithm that rules us on the site.

Here is that most triumphant quote from his classic set:

“Have you noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?” — George Carlin

Not only was he a brilliant comedian, but he really knew his shit.

In the end, we might all be better off watching Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure than trying to figure out the meaning of quality.

Because deep down, when you stop listening to all that outside noise, you know quality when you see it.

After all, wouldn’t you ditch one of Europe’s greatest leaders in San Dimas if he was being a dick?

Be excellent to each other!

If you enjoyed this article, you might want to read part 2:

FOOTNOTES:

¹A Simpsons reference to the motto of the Rommelwood Military Academy.

²Cruyff is not well known to Americans. He transcended his sport by boycotting the 1978 World Cup in Argentina because of dictator Jorge Videla.