# 02 The point of no return

Love is what it’s all about Part 1.

“I need to know, she said, do you want to have children?”

I had met her a couple of weeks earlier.

Now she was lying next to me. Close, looking at me with a question in her eyes.

I had the feeling she was going to say something important, something that was not trivial.

«Before we go on with this,» she said.

«Yes?»

«I need to know — do you want to have children?»

I lent back, looked her deep into the eyes.

My thoughts went a couple of weeks back in time. That night out in the city, in the club where we met.

I saw her standing on the floor, talking with a woman. I remember it as if it was yesterday. From that very moment I had no doubt at all. I knew there was something. There was something in her, and the one thing I knew for sure was that I did not want to lose sight of her.

I approached, I asked her to dance. She turned her head, looked quickly at me.

«Just wait a moment!» she said. And she continued the conversation with the person on the other side.

I stood there behind her, waiting. Three minutes, five minutes, perhaps six, seven. Then, suddenly, she turned towards me. As if she saw me for the first time. She seemed a little surprised.

«Oh! You are still there!»

I did not know what to reply. I could not find the appropriate answer. I nodded, I smiled. A slightly foolish smile, I guess.

After that moment we started to be together every possible moment. After four days she came at lunch time with me to my apartment. I made coffee. We had a small meal. We talked. I reached out to her. We talked a lot. She met me. I felt perfect. We were perfectly relaxed. I liked her eyes, I loved to look at her face. A mixture of seriousness and joy, a warming smile.

She stayed over the night. Then she stayed the following night, and the nights thereafter.

It was one of those nights she lent back and looked at me. A serious look, and she was waiting for an answer:

«Before we go on with this,» she said.

«Yes?»

«I need to know,» she said, «do you want to have children?»

«Yes, I do,» I said, without hesitation.

She looked at me. Directly, as if she was going to see through me. She gave me a long glance.

Then she smiled. She approached, gave me a hug.

That was the decisive moment, the point of no return. I liked her. Neither I nor she wanted to stop, to pause or end what we had started.

Since that moment, during these two weeks and much of our time ever since, we have been together almost 24/7. When I think back it is like something unreal, like some fairy tale I’ve heard or read. During the few hours when we were separated because she went to her university course, or I had to go to work, I felt alone and lost like I had never felt before. I was thinking of her incessantly, I felt incomplete when I was not with her.

Thank you for reading!

This is a chapter in a novel I am publishing here on Medium, work title Love is what it’s all about. Writing a novel (online or in a traditional way) is a rather lonely task. I would very much appreciate your response. Comments are welcome!

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