You’re Not Concerned About Fat People’s Health

There’s a difference between having health risks and having actual health problems.

Every day, I’m faced with constant reminders that my body is not the right body. Sometimes, they come in casual comments I overhear at the office or the grocery store; other times, in movies or on TV. Time after time, I am told that the main reason my body is wrong is because it is unhealthy, and that concerns people.

Stop right there. You are not concerned about me, or any fat person. “Concern” implies that you care about someone’s well-being. If you cared about my health, you might ask how I was doing, or how I was feeling. You might listen to the answer I gave rather than one you’ve already fabricated in your mind.

Recently, I wrote an article about my frustration with how fat people are portrayed in our culture.

When I shared it, comments started to roll in. I expected it, the usual faux-concern that non-fat people seem to have for the “health” of fat people.

“Big heart attacks waiting to happen yuck…”

“no excuse in this day and age to be like that completely disgusting...”

“that picture of the cottage cheese lady how obscene God it’s awful.”

I wonder if anyone experiences being told they are going to die by complete strangers as much as fat people do.

At what point did it become commonplace to walk around looking at strangers and dictating that they’re on the verge of death? Why is it so hard to grasp the concept that you can’t judge someone’s health just by looking at them. I could name 100 diseases off the top of my head that can live in a body of any size. Equating “healthy” with “not fat” is fallacious at best.

Health is not a physical attribute.

Someone in a body that takes up less space can easily be unhealthy, and someone in a body like mine can be healthy. It’s impossible to look at someone and know what benefits or risks their body, health, or habits are presenting.

There are studies that show that overweight people are less likely to die from chronic conditions, that underweight patients are more likely to die from a stroke than heavier people, that obese people are more likely to survive infections and sepsis, that patients hospitalized for pneumonia are less likely to die when overweight. Despite this, the internet is remarkably absent of articles about how morally wrong it is to be skinny.

There’s a difference between having health risks and having actual health problems. Plenty of “obese” people are legitimately healthy. Many of us run, do yoga, go to the gym, eat salads, and do all the things you assume we must not be doing.

People do things every day that carry some level of risk and don’t get judged for it.

But the moment the risk has to do with being fat, it triggers this weird, aggressive compulsion to express “concern.” If you are truly concerned about public health, your focus should widen to the excessive drinking, unhealthy fad diets, opioid crisis, and disordered eating that are so prevalent in our culture. Not only are these risky behaviors accepted, they’re often lauded (at least as long as they’re being done by thin folks).

Where do you draw the line for which risky behaviors are acceptable and which are not? Should people stop driving cars or riding bicycles due to the risk of accidents? Should we not lift weights or do cross-fit to avoid the risk of injury? Should we ban professional football, recognizing the high risk of brain damage? Perhaps we should all stop eating solid foods to avoid the risk of choking. At some point, did someone give us all the right to police other people’s lives?

“listen idc about your weight if you’re big and happy then great however for you to say it doesn’t cause health issues and other complications, you stay that way and I’ll be ripped flat out ...”

“If you’re fully aware of the risks then why are you promoting them? Why are you setting people up to be unhealthy?”

“An your whole page is on about why not to fat shame, however you’re not posting anything on the risks of being overweight. You’re an advocate for obesity.”

Wait. So, in addition to being responsible to the world for making myself “healthier” (read: not as gross to look at), now I am being made responsible for the “unhealthiness” of all people? Insisting that fat people talk about the health risks of being fat is just another empty suggestion to try and control our behavior.

Saying I’m an advocate for obesity is like saying that pro-choice people are advocates for abortion. I’m not supporting or recommending that people go out and purposely become obese. Why would I ever encourage someone to do something that will cause them to be treated as sub-human? I am an advocate for respecting fellow humans, and for not judging them based on a number on a scale. Asking to be treated with the same respect and decency as any other human being is not glorifying anything.

I’ve never heard any fat person say that everyone should be fat.

I’ve certainly never said that being fat is better, more beautiful, more healthy, or more anything. I guarantee you no fat person is reading this, or the comments left below it, and starting to think that they are magically healthier because they’re fat; or that thin people are reading it and thinking, “oh it’s super healthy to be fat, maybe I’ll start packing on some pounds.”

Do you know what is actually dangerous? The attitude that fat people are unhealthy and undesirable and must change. Research shows that when people like me face fat phobia, the stress of being stigmatized and shamed on a daily basis, it makes it nearly impossible to address any health issues we do have that need attention.

You know what they say about assumptions.

Fat people must be lazy. We must be unwilling to put in the work or think it is too hard to take care of ourselves. Our diets must be shitty, and our days must be full of sloth. These ideas about what I have and have not done and how I live are 0% based on reality.

“You weight the same because you’re not willing to change.”

“a society where people think being fat is healthy is a toxic one. An frankly it’s disgusting.”

“you’ve been 300lbs for years and if that’s the case then it shows you’re not willing to loose the weight. It took me 8 months to loose 60lbs and that’s bevuse Ingot off my ass.”

“Nothing says fat is healthy you dope so believe in false hope that fat is healthy and just stick with having issues tying your shoes for fuck sakes or walking 50 yards …my God goodnight Felicia...”

“No. It’s NOT amusing. It is, in fact, detrimental to one’s health to be so overweight. It’s statistically more deadly than smoking. We hear complaints from people who are tragically overweight and addicted to food (which is more addictive than crack, for your information), namely: refined sugars and grains. Anyone can do this! But don’t listen to me. I’m just an ABS-hole. Lol.”

First of all, it’s “Goodbye, Felicia.”

Secondly, I don’t know about you, but being told I am disgusting definitely makes me want to change myself for the person who said it.

Whether or not how much I weigh puts me at risk for certain things is no one else’s business. My body has naturally sat at this weight for years. I haven’t lost weight, but I haven’t gained either. And I have seen zero evidence provided by doctors, scientists, or super concerned commenters that this isn’t just the shape my body is meant to have.

Underlying all of this is the assumption that fat people are stupid.

Couched within all of this “concern” is the not-so-subtle suggestion that I am not only unhealthy but also a complete idiot. Do you really think that fat people don’t already know they are fat, and the health risks that go with it? Of course we do. The idea that we need skinny people to “care” about our health and remind us that we aren’t acceptable is ridiculous.

I have been “obese” for years. I am fully aware of the health risks that CAN come with being overweight. Keyword: CAN. People live for decades in fat bodies all the time without getting morbidly ill or dying. I have never claimed that I’m not fat, or that I am healthier than anyone else. I will, however, claim that I know my body and I do pay attention to it.

My health isn’t anyone’s business but my own.

I could spend hours listing all of my non-concerning test results, my conversations with my doctor, the state of my body. But I won’t. For one thing, my health is nobody’s business, being fat doesn’t negate my right to privacy. The real reason is that, in the end, it won’t do any good anyway. Any mention of my health is met with something like this:

“So you’re telling me your heart doesn’t have triple the work Because of excessive weight? Yea ok you’re to funny ..plus diabetes ok Rachel i have my own views i guess”

If you were actually concerned about my health, it might help to share information about it. But the fact is, you are not concerned. You’re just offended by the way I look.

When I point any of this out, I am met with more assurance that I am going to die, and accusations that I am lying.

“Ok I’m not buying your author bullshit cardiac embolism will catch up don’t worry ..you have half of that in the grave already.”

“I’m sorry but if you’re going to come on to a pubic forum and lie about the benefits of being fat then you’re going to come across people who disagree with you. I dont want to see a world or country where being unhealthy is the norm.”

“You lack the knowledge of how being overweight effects your body. And Ibcan grantee that your or any doctor will tell you your way overweight. I’m sorry you feel the need to write such misleading articles, you’re not helping anyone your just pushing the in the direction that will soon lead to thier down fall. And no this isnt bulling its telling you the truth.”

People who don’t bully other people don’t feel the need to preface their statements with “And no, this isn’t bullying.” It’s hard to distinguish if all of this is concern trolling, or if these people are just too ignorant to understand.

When I point out the logical fallacies, they tell me that I’m brainwashed. Then they insist that I can’t tell them they are wrong because the fact that all fat people are unhealthy is their “opinion” and that opinions can’t be wrong. They tell me that they pity me because I am blind to the truth of my own situation. None of it makes any sense, being told to justify my existence, then to plead my case elsewhere because they “don’t give a shit.”

My eyes are wide open, and I can see right through this so-called concern. It’s time to stop pretending to care about the health of my fat body and admit that you just don’t like fat people. Regardless of whether being fat is healthy or not, no one has the right to treat me and people like me as jokes or as lesser humans. We deserve common decency regardless of our size.