Your Vote Is Not a Valentine
It’s a vote for one of two people you might not love.
When you cast your vote in November, it doesn’t require you like 100% of what the candidate represents. That would be unrealistic, and frankly, silly. You aren’t choosing a spouse; you are choosing a President. Passion may be required to choose a spouse or a career, but love is not a requirement when choosing a POTUS.
You will never like everything about one candidate or another human being, for that matter. Have you ever met someone you agree with on 100% of every issue under the sun? You have a choice between two viable people in November.
When you cast your ballot, it isn’t an all-out 100% endorsement but rather a small step in the better of two directions.
You aren’t courting the candidate for a date, you aren’t sending a love letter, or proposing, you’re not asking the candidate to be your valentine, or to live with you candidate for eternity, just for four to eight years.
You are casting your ballot for the candidate you think will lead the country in a better direction than the other candidate.
The only attribution I could find to the sentence, “your vote is not a valentine,” is Rebecca Solnit, a writer, and activist. “She spoke powerfully about the importance of voting as a strategic choice rather than a solemn duty,” according to PFAW.org.
When you cast your ballot, it isn’t an all-out 100% endorsement but rather a small step in the better of two directions. I’ve been accused of loving Hillary Clinton. And while that accusation is accurate — I admire and have tremendous respect for Hillary Clinton, I proudly voted for her in the 2016 election and would vote for her if she were running against just about anyone — I did not love every political move Hillary Clinton made.
I was disappointed in her VP pick. I thought Tim Kaine a prosaic choice for 2016 — too safe, too middle of the road, too white, too center for me. I was hoping she would pick Julián Castro, a man whose political career I’ve been watching for a decade (I lived in Austin, TX for a stint). I did not hold this unfortunate lapse in judgment against Hillary Clinton or her political advisors.
I voted for her anyway.
I didn’t like how the Hillary Clinton campaign used the slogan, “Love Trumps Hate.” I thought it downright stupid to give Trump more free advertising — the New York Times and Facebook were giving him plenty of publicity wherever he went and reported on every ignorant thing that slipped off his tongue.
I voted for her anyway despite this rookie mistake.
I never judged Hillary Clinton for the choices she’s made in her private life — it is her private life; those choices are none of my business, I’m not her daughter or friend. Nor do I think we will be besties one day, although if we hung in the same circles, I sure would try.
I never held the vote to go to war with Iraq against her; I wasn’t in the room to hear the intel on which she based her vote. Also, she admitted it was a mistake, not many politicians admit when they are wrong, yet she does.
I voted for her anyway.
I voted for her because she knows how to get shit done.
Clinton is a practical politician who knows how to move the needle on a policy. Her expertise on how to drill down as a wonk on policy matters and come up with real solutions appeals to me. She was also humble about working across the aisle with Republican Senators like John McCain and Lindsey Graham before he had a “brain snatch,” during her time as a United States Senator.
She could explain the intricacies of policy on several issues in her sleep, while in heels backward.
In my experience, the very same people who shout the loudest about gridlock in politics are the same people who didn’t vote for Clinton. Clinton knows flexibility is part of the job of politics. The willingness to move to the left or the right on issues is required on The Hill, as is the ability to listen.
Two skills in which Clinton excels. She was the best choice.
If you are part of the privileged few saying Biden is more of the same, more of “the establishment,” it’s a mute and useless argument because your other choice is Trump.
You cannot argue they are the same. Because they are not the same.
Biden will further push policy and politics to the left while in office. Expanding The Affordable Care Act is just one.
He will nominate at least one liberal judge on the Supreme Court.
Trump, well, you know Trump, he is a pathological liar and gaslighter who will seat conservative judges on the Court just like the disastrous pick he made in Kavanaugh.
Supreme Court decisions have the power to shift our society’s fabric to the right or left for decades, depending on who is elected President. Judges don’t have limits on the time they serve on the Court. They stay as long as they like or are removed by impeachment for bad behavior.
If the candidate you wanted to be on the ticket is not on the ticket, like mine is not, your candidate is not a choice. That sucks. I hear that. The fact that I find myself voting for Biden is not ideal for me after witnessing the first female make it on a major party’s ticket. Biden was never the ideal for me, even before Clinton made her historic run the first time. I don’t like the way in which Biden handled the Anita Hill hearings; I watched them at the time. Anita Hill has said she is voting for Biden over Trump.
If Anita Hill can, so can I.
Having to cast a vote for Biden after so many women (thank you, Hillary) and POC ran for the Democratic ticket is a tough pill to swallow. The pill goes down easier though when I think about the most marginalized in our society — those on edges just hanging on — whose very bodies and lives are at stake if we have to endure four more years of Trump Chaos.
I’ll be thinking of my teenage daughter when I cast my vote in November for the only person running against Trump, who has a real shot at beating him.
But that is how it is.
Grown-ups see life as it is, they look at the choices, and they choose for the better of society as a whole. They don’t piss and moan and sit out because their choice wasn’t impactful enough to garner the votes they needed to be on the ticket.
Cast a vote, not a valentine.
Jessica is a writer, an online entrepreneur, and a recovering perfectionist. She lives in Los Angeles with her extrovert daughter, two dogs, and two cats
