Your Reality Is Never About The Situation But Your Thoughts About It

Life is a matter of perspective

Have you ever considered that nothing is ever as it seems? Between what is and what isn’t, life is smack somewhere between truth and reality.

How you perceive your surroundings affect how life will eventually play out. That’s because everything in life is malleable, depending on your perception of it. No matter how similar they appear, no two people ever see or experience life the same way.

If everything in life is truly a matter of perspective, then I may be correct to assume that perspective is the only truth there is.

Whose perspective then, matters the most to me if not mine? After all, who else can view life accurately from my standpoint apart from me?

That thought alone brings much hope and confidence, no matter what situation I find myself in. Regardless of what I’m going through, everything can change based on what I see.

Perspective matters because it enables me to see beyond my current circumstances and the challenges I encounter. If all I do is remain in the narrow, scarcity mindset of self-focus, I risk losing my sense of priorities and the possibility of viewing the world through a different lens.

External factors shape my lens and influence how I ultimately view my world. I allow others’ points of view — what they think is best, and their logic to affect my decisions in life.

There were times I adopted a perspective I had not fully come to terms with, lacking fundamental understanding. I received advice and instruction from others about what seemed acceptable for me without fully considering the implications. I didn’t want to offend them, especially if they were someone in authority.

I made the mistake of assuming since it worked for them, it would undoubtedly work for me too. I entered situations and committed myself with doubt and half-heartedness, expecting someone else’s idea to make up for my lack of confidence. It didn’t take long for me to realize I cannot live by other people’s perspectives on my life.

Some may argue that perspective is not all there is. Instead, we should look at the bigger picture. Of course, no question about that. But how can we see the bigger picture when it does not appear on our radar?

When challenges arise, when uncertainty erects a roadblock on our path, our perspective about what’s going on can either make or mar our life experiences. Despite well-meaning advice, whatever we experience internally will seem more real to us.

We do not accidentally stumble upon positive attributes and character traits that instantly shift our mindset overnight to embrace change. That does not happen by chance. It takes small habitual changes we consciously apply one moment at a time.

I’ve heard people talk about advice they wish they could tell their younger 20 or 30-year-old self. That is a noble thought. Even if that’s possible, I seriously doubt my younger self would listen to what I have to say.

I may speak from years of experience, lessons learned, and through the school of hard knocks. But my younger self doesn’t mind failing and taking risks. Until she experiences a certain degree of inconvenience, she probably won’t learn to value what she has. Her perspective of the world completely differs from mine.

If we don’t define our perspectives, we likely peek through everyone else’s lenses, listening and accepting others’ interpretations. We adopt their version of what is acceptable, what happiness encompasses, and how our lives should be.

We dream about our goals and become hyper-focused on the objectives that we forget to define success for ourselves. After multiple attempts and failures, we stop short, disappointed with ourselves because we have not arrived at someone’s definition of what success means.

My perspective of success is living up to the measure of my expectations. If I gained years of experience but have not attained an upper-class lifestyle, have I failed? If I grew my skills by becoming more confident but didn’t start my own business, did I miss the mark? If I developed my writing voice without earning a five-figure income, does that mean I’m a failure?

What is a failure other than our insistence that we are not who or where we thought we should be? Are those not the opinions of others we have adopted because their perspectives about life is all or nothing?

When we define our perspectives on life, we cultivate a growth mindset, focusing on positive outcomes that support our aspirations. We learn to react positively to challenges and opportunities based on our strengths, weaknesses, and potentials.

Is reality the ultimate truth, or is perspective everything? If you decide perspective is everything, that means changing the way you look at life changes reality itself. By attaining a positive outlook on a negative situation, you’re motivated to keep going, keep pushing and keep reaching towards what you desire.

Life can sometimes be a bitch, often taking off without the courtesy of first seeking our consent. Regardless of the path we’re traversing, nothing in life is ever as good or as bad as it appears. We can still choose our experience by changing the lens we view the world.

One moment, everything is exactly as it appears. Suddenly you look again, and it is entirely different. Perspective is all there is.

I was inspired by Hudson Rennie’s personal story about his perspective on failing.