Your Burdens Aren’t Even Heavy: The Secret Behind The Liberation in Responsibility

I haven’t written in days.

I was struggling to find that something again.

I thought it was because I didn’t have a topic I was passionate about that I didn’t have that spark.

And the more I tried, the more I failed.

Again and again, when writing, I tried to find that “zone”.

That feeling.

That something.

But who knew all I needed was to remind myself why?

Unsurmountable wall.

When you face a wall you can’t surpass, what do you do?

How do you move forward?

How do you progress?

When you can’t find anything in you to keep going?

When it’s too hard to start?

When it’s too hard to try?

When it’s just too hard to overcome it?

That barrier you can’t seem to break.

Whether that be a mental or an inspirational block.

How do you tackle the unsurmountable wall?

Change your focus.

Start with how you’re looking at the wall.

It isn’t insurmountable.

I was so focused on how hard it was for me to write to a standard I was proud of that, I forgot what carried me there in the first place.

Something outside of my own desires.

Look at the root of your purpose.

My purpose is to give.

That is my “to and for”.

And Ryan Holiday writes that purpose is “something outside of yourself.”

And I’m aware of this, yet I still forgot.

The reason I found it so hard to write was because I was focused on myself.

Desire took my giving and twisted it into desire.

It made me greedy.

It made me self-centred.

It felt so much harder to write.

I wasn’t satisfied.

I was uninspired.

There was so much expectation.

Because it was all about me.

I was doing it to feel good, not to give.

And here’s the problem with that:

I feel alive when I write because it’s an opportunity to give.

I feel excited about a topic because I can’t wait to share it and change somebody’s worldview.

Not to be told, I can write well.

Not to be told, my writing’s perfect.

I love it because it’s ROOTED in my purpose.

A world without purpose.

Here’s how I dragged myself out the depths of desire:

A letter to myself.

Hey.

Never forget this.

Every time you choose yourself, you sacrifice someone else.

Someone who could’ve heard.

Someone who could’ve benefitted.

Someone who could’ve grown.

Their potential is in the palm of your hand.

And you crush it every single time you choose you.

When you choose recognition, somebody dies.

When you choose perfection, somebody dies.

When you allow pride, procrastination, satisfaction or greed to twist your purpose into desire.

You look at someone’s potential to grow, and spit on it.

Is that what you want from your writing?

Is that what you want to live for?

Is that the reason you’re sacrificing?

To trample on the potential someone has entrusted you with?

Of course not.

But that’s what it means to live passionately.

Now that you understand what it means, don’t ever let go of your purpose.

It is your responsibility to shoulder the pain in order to give to them.

Never forget that.

That is the responsibility on your shoulders.

YOU HAVE NO CHOICE.

YOU HAVE TO WRITE.

EVERY SINGLE DAY.

It doesn’t matter how hard it feels, it’s worse to fail and give up on someone.

As long as you’re giving, you’re living.

That is your why.

Never forget that.

It sounds extreme, but that is the reality.

Every time I choose myself instead of writing, somebody is short-changed.

All so I can feel good for 30 minutes.

Pathetic.

But that letter was all it took.

To break my writer’s block, all I needed was to understand that my purpose is bigger than my desire.

Suddenly the wall wasn’t so insurmountable.

Suddenly it wasn’t so hard to write.

Suddenly giving something I was proud of became so easy.

Suddenly the big and scary barrier to my writing was so small.

Why?

Because I tipped the balance.

That’s all it took.

I created a reality, where there was nothing more important than writing.

A reality where the most important thing was my why.

Rest wasn’t more important.

My feelings weren’t more important.

My relaxation wasn’t more important.

Because my why was bigger than my why not.

Of course I’d find a way.

When your why is bigger than anything, you’ll soon realise that Your Burdens Aren’t Even Heavy.

They’re fitting.

LM.