Summary

The article discusses how adults can learn from the perseverance of a toddler to overcome the barriers to success created by their own rationalizing minds.

Abstract

The author reflects on the unwavering determination of their 8-month-old daughter, who persistently attempts new skills like crawling and standing without the hesitation or self-doubt that often plagues adults. The article pinpoints the "age of reason," around ages 6 to 7, as the critical period when children begin to rationalize and worry, potentially hindering their willingness to try and fail. The author argues that while rationalization is a necessary adult skill for considering future consequences, it can also lead to excessive worry and avoidance of challenges. To counteract this, the author suggests adopting a "toddler thinking" approach, emphasizing action over motivation. By forcing oneself to take incremental steps towards a goal, one can overcome initial resistance and eventually achieve a state of flow and success, much like a child learning to walk.

Opinions

The author believes that the development of rational thinking during the "age of reason" can lead to increased worry and hesitation in adults, which often prevents them from pursuing their goals.
They suggest that taking action, even when not motivated, is more important than waiting for motivation to strike, as action can lead to motivation rather than the other way around.
The author posits that success in any endeavor can be achieved by consistently taking small, incremental actions, drawing a parallel to how a toddler learns through persistent attempts and gradual progress.
They imply that the ability to worry, while protective, is often unfounded since most worries never materialize, and this worry can be a significant obstacle to success.
The author encourages readers to support them by leaving comments, clapping for the article, and even buying them a coffee, indicating a desire for community engagement and support for their work.

Your Brain is Stopping You From Being Successful!

Why does my 8-month-old daughter experience more success than you

In the last 2 months, my 8-month-old daughter has gone from bouncing around on her hands and knees to crawling to standing up.

She has failed at all of those stages countless times within that progression.

Did she ever once give up and say; “maybe crawling isn’t for me? Maybe walking is just something I’m not meant to do?”

No, of course not. She didn’t even give it a second thought! She got straight back up after taking a number of pretty hefty tumbles and persevered!

When do we lose that?

When do we start considering things too much?

When are we able to get too much into our own heads and talk ourselves out of things?

How can we utilize toddler thinking to be more successful?

These are questions I will answer in this article. Let’s dive in!

The age of reason

This is an interesting part of a child’s development that happens between the ages of 6 and 7.

At this stage:

“Children suddenly begin feeling more detached from their parents and have the potential to be less certain of many things.” (Source: motherforlife.com).

They suddenly seem to realise that situations that seemed so simple to begin with “now have more nuance to them” (Source: scholastic.com).

So it seems this is the stage at which life begins to seem less straightforward, less black and white.

Interestingly, children start to have a much better understanding of right and wrong, good and bad and are able to understand these concepts rationally (Source: motherforlife.com).

It stops being “If I want to do this; I keep trying until it happens” and becomes; “It’s hard, do I really want to do this?”

Rationalisation. The double-edged sword

The ability to rationalise and consider future events seems to also lead to the ability to worry. After all, if we can’t consider the future, there would be nothing to worry about!

Of course, as adults, we need this ability.

Worry is intended to mitigate negative circumstances and feelings resulting from events or situations in the future. It protects us mentally and physically when we get to the stage of making our own decisions (Source: Psychologytoday.com).

Unfortunately, it is also a huge hindrance to success because;

“Most of what we worry about never happens”

(Source: Psychologytoday.com).

From talking to people who are aiming for a large goal, it is much easier to rationalise all the reasons why you shouldn’t start, and subsequently talk yourself out of it than it is to just start!

So how can use the Jedi toddler thought process?

How to think like a toddler

My daughter never contemplated standing up. She took action! She tried, but she failed. She tried again, but she failed. Over and over again, Each time getting a little bit closer, until she succeeded.

I have found the secret to being successful in anything you are aiming to achieve is to take action.

Many people believe that you have to be motivated to take action.

I have not found this to be the case.

Action trumps motivation!

I get up at 5 a.m. every morning to write articles. I was nowhere near motivated when I started writing at that time — anyone who tells you differently is trying to sell you something!

So, I force myself to take action.

I force myself to write a sentence. Then I force myself to write a paragraph. Gradually (admittedly, also after a couple of coffees) I am in the flow state and the words start to flow more naturally and I end up with an article.

Force yourself to take small incremental actions that eventually lead to the ultimate goal!

That is the secret!

You can apply this to any goal you have.

Don’t let your rational adult mind talk you out of taking action before you have even started.

Force yourself to take that first step, whatever it might be. Then take a slightly bigger step — it will start to feel a little easier. Keep going until you don’t have to force yourself anymore.

Going to the gym — first step: Force yourself to walk out the door. Second step: walk/drive to the gym
Starting a freelance business — first step: Force yourself to sign up for an account on Fiverr. Second step: create your profile
Saving $100 per month to go on holiday — first step: Tomorrow create a holiday account in your bank and add $3.50. Second step: Add the same every day for the next month.
Trying to get a new job — first step: Sit down and plan out your CV. Second step: write the first sentence of your cv…

… and then the next small step and the next until you reach your goal.

Hey, if my 8-month-old daughter can do it, you can do it too, right!?

For more advice on taking action check out this article:

Stop Setting Definite Goals!

Focus on this instead

medium.com

OK guys, that’s what I have for you this time. I hope you enjoyed the read. If you got value from the article, I would greatly appreciate it if you would leave me a clap and a comment as that really helps me grow on the platform!

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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and support me it is greatly greatly appreciated!

Speak soon,

Christian