The Authentic Eclectic

You Will Never Control 2 of These 3 Things so Get the Chip Off Your Shoulder

Unpack the extra stress that erodes your mental health

Humans are fascinating.

We don’t have to hide quietly behind trees to spy on the behaviors they exhibit in their natural habitat.

They just do it.

Anywhere and everywhere.

Oblivious or not, they carry on as if the world revolves around them.

They whine, pontificate, wave a fist, or stomp their feet over issues that don’t pertain to them.

The anger comes out while they finger point and insist on how right they are and how wrong you are.

“Angry people are not always wise.” ~ Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

So much anger.

So much wasted energy.

I want to hug them, pull them in close to whisper softly in their ear. Gentle pats on their backs would accompany my words.

Now, now, here, here. Breathe, just breathe; it’s going to be okay.

I would pour them a big glass of Cabernet. I’d light them a cigarette even if they don’t smoke and put their feet up on an ottoman.

The tone would be set as I quietly explained some vital things they have missed in life.

I may even lightly rub their temples.

My velvety, husky voice would use words that caressed their souls into sedation.

I’ll talk, you just relax.

Together, we can unpack the emotional boulders that weigh you down and erode your mental health.

We can start small.

Let’s get rid of anger starting with an easy concept.

Opinions

Who cares?

Yours, mine, or theirs.

None of them ultimately matter. You can think anything you want, about anything in the entire world, and leave others to do the same.

Obsessing over 2 out of the 3 will slowly suffocate your happiness.

Let’s go through these, one by one.

Your Opinion

Congratulations!

Your opinion is the easiest one. Be the King or Queen of your very own brain castle.

You have total, exclusive control of your own opinions.

You have that right to think. Make the choices that work for you. Fill your brain with love, hate, inane nothingness, or even new scientific equations.

It’s your brain castle. Dig out a moat if you’re fearful of hearing differing views from others.

Do the backstroke in your water barrier. Wear a swim cap with flowers and skinny dip if you’re so inclined.

A speedo, why not?

It’s your moat. Just don’t come out to scream your thoughts at everyone else, especially in your speedo. It’s distracting.

Relax.

Feel all the feels, and wallow in your loveliness of thought. Float. After all, it is your brain. Do with it what you will.

Never feel pressured to share, though. Hold onto your opinion and let it roll between your ears to give it a proper smoothed polish.

You are not required to listen to another person’s opinion, either, or even react to any of them. If you think you may fly off the handle at a dissenting view, then please refrain from crossing over your moat.

You are the King or Queen of your very own brain castle.

You have 100% control over your opinion.

My Opinion

Never let my opinion bother you. I am not asking you to think like me. Please don’t read between the lines.

Never insert your narrative to discount mine.

You won’t find me shoving my finely tuned thought processes down your throat.

I formed them for me.

My life, my views, are mine, and I like them.

The nice thing is that you don’t even need to understand them. You simply don’t need to care.

Isn’t that great?

You can concentrate on yourself more and guilt-free.

I won’t tell you that you’re wrong in your life choices, either, so please reciprocate with the same respectful silence.

Personally, I can handle hearing a variety of viewpoints.

Some can’t.

No one can simply wake up doing this. I cultivated my Zen-like serenity after years of banging my head into brick walls and letting the blood blind me as it ran into my eyes.

I am conditioned after much hard work.

Do not listen to me if you are not ready to openly receive my words without vocalizing judgment. You simply are not ready if I am talking, and you are compelled to interject.

What you deem to be bigger, better, a more schooled opinion, doesn’t matter.

Foisting your unsolicited advice and thoughts on me is not only uncomfortable but just plain rude.

Your need to be heard and catered to, screams of underlying anger and control issues.

Get back to floating in the serenity of your mental moat.

Remember, you have zero control of my brain.

Their Opinion

It isn’t recommended that you use your mental wellness energy beyond your own thoughts.

No stress over my opinion. No anxiety over their opinion.

Their opinions and views are theirs, and again, you have zero control.

None.

Zippo.

I recently read what posed as a movie review about Encanto. Disney has outdone itself with the music, imagery, cultural flavor, family dynamics, and fantasy according to the preschool children.

It’s aimed at children, so the depth would be age-appropriate.

Encanto captivates all generations for what it's worth. It’s a kid’s glorified musical in film.

Both my grandson and I have watched it numerous times. Each time we watched had us laughing, crying, and dancing.

The reviewer, however, had to be exhausted. I could feel her mental drain. Her entire focus kept circling back to her disappointment with the underpinnings of the characters.

Bruno never explained his apology, Mirabel was unfairly treated, gaslighting prevailed, and emotional abuse ran rampant trickling down from Abuela.

She went on and on, like a backseat psych driver, ranting about what the moviemakers missed in coming full circle.

This writer was obviously triggered by the lack of closure on individual multi-layered concepts that would easily add another few hours to complete.

Did the family have issues?

Yes.

Conflict is a given in most movie storylines.

She shaded her 1800-word ‘review’ of the movie, however, with everything lacking in her personal care, I suppose. I felt worse for her than the movie could ever make me feel.

Nothing was redeemable in Encanto based on her personal experiences and opinions.

Maybe I missed something.

It was a movie.

Let it go.

The world doesn’t key in on our personal psychiatric needs. No one is required to give closure to things we need.

Encanto was not an instructional video to assist those who may require counseling.

It was a movie.

Let it go.

It was a Disney story.

The writers, producers, designers, and directors put together a fantasy tale for entertainment. It was their opinion as they put forth their vision.

“Peace of mind and inner peace come when you resolve conflicts that you have with yourself.” ~ Germany Kent

Our mental health can easily tip from healthy to unhealthy. There is no shortlist of reasons that fits everyone.

We all have our own paths.

However, the obvious booby-traps for emotional distress can be addressed starting now. Baby steps help.

• Stay in your lane.
• Be, and let others be.
• Embrace what you can control, which is you.

You.

Your opinions, thoughts, and emotional reactions are exclusively yours. Respect yourself by respecting others.

There’s no need to whine, pontificate, wave a fist, or stomp your feet over issues that don’t pertain to you.

Walk away from emotional static and mental noise, physically and metaphorically. It’s not your business, your worry, or in your control anyway.

It never was.

Recognizing that alone will help you unpack the extra stress and pent-up anger that erodes your mental health.

Let it go.

If you are concerned about your need to control or feel your anger is unmanageable there are many resources at your fingertips.

If you’re interested in joining Medium, please consider clicking on my link below. You’ll gain access to thousands of stories and creative writers.

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