Summary

The article discusses the importance of leveraging the "Last Resort" strategy to effect personal change by setting high stakes and involving others for accountability.

Abstract

The author emphasizes that change is difficult because the brain resists leaving its comfort zone. To overcome this, one must treat their brain as a separate entity and create significant stakes, akin to an ultimatum, to motivate change. The article suggests that simply creating an ultimatum for oneself is insufficient due to the lack of external pressure. Instead, involving a third party, such as an accountability partner or building in public, can increase the fear of embarrassment and thus the commitment to change. The author challenges readers to set a deadline for their personal transformation, using their own experience as an example, and invites support for their writing career through follows, newsletters, and subscriptions.

Opinions

Change is challenging because the brain prefers familiarity over the unknown.
Creating an ultimatum for oneself is often ineffective without external enforcement.
Involving a third party for accountability can significantly increase one's commitment to change due to the fear of public embarrassment.
The author uses their personal aversion to being perceived as a "loser" as motivation to change.
Setting a deadline, such as January 1st, is recommended to start the change process immediately rather than waiting for a symbolic new beginning.
The author practices what they preach by asking others to hold them accountable for their goals.
Supporting the author's dream of becoming a full-time writer is encouraged through various means, including following on Medium, subscribing to the newsletter, and purchasing a Medium subscription.

You Didn’t Manage To Accomplish It Again? Use the Last Resort

The last resort is not only for saving your relationships

Staying in the darkness and not liking the place…

It’s so hard to change even if you don’t admit it, your brain is fighting it.

It doesn’t want to leave the comfort of familiarity.

When everything is in the known, you’re fighting tooth and nail to stay.

So, what can you do to remove that grip?

The relationship between you

Look at your brain as a separate entity.

Another person, if you will.

When you want the other person to change, usually you go:

“Change or else.”

Or else… What?

Exactly, create the stakes or else.

What are you afraid of?

Channel it.

If you don’t want it to happen, if you would rather change than for it to happen, that’s when you know you chose the right thing.

For example, I set out to change because I didn’t want to be a loser.

Being an embarrassment forever is worse than trying and failing.

I’d rather do something to escape the “losership”.

You could say I was already living my “or else” part but it didn’t end yet.

The “or else” was “change or you will be an embarrassment forever.”

I want to be someone I can be proud of.

I want to brag to people about my accomplishments.

So, I did it.

I pulled the “Last Resort” card.

But is it enough?

The ultimatum alone is weak

So, what if you created an ultimatum for yourself?

You did it to yourself, you can just skip the part where you do the “or else” bit and continue living life.

The fact is, when you’re your own boss, you can just not listen to yourself.

What are you going to do?

It’s not like you’ll fear the confrontation or facing yourself after you fail.

It’s not like you’ll lose yourself.

I recommend upping the stakes.

Create a deadline.

“I will [blank] until [blank] or else I’ll have to [blank].”

Doesn’t that sound threatening?

No?

I just told you the problem with it.

You have to fix it.

Involving a third party

When you do something, it’s an excellent idea to ask for feedback.

So, when you commit to something, it’s wise to grab an accountability partner.

Or you can build in public, where everyone will see your failures, everyone will know if you kept your word.

If you fail and break the promise.

Isn’t that embarrassing?

Everyone will know you aren’t trustworthy.

They won’t be able to trust your word from now on.

Because if you broke a promise to yourself, what will ensure you won’t break the promise to them?

Oh, the embarrassment.

Enough hesitation

Now you have all the parts of commitment, what are you going to do about it?

I believe you have something you want to change.

There’s no way you’re perfect.

(If you are… Wow, congrats)

I CHALLENGE YOU:

make the deadline on January 1st.

Don’t wait for the New Year, start right now.

Think as long as you want but know that you’re going to have less time to execute it.

I did it already on X, asking people to keep me accountable. I set out to do it so you can as well.

And of course, If you liked the article, support my dream of becoming a full-time writer by doing any of these:

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